Match #21: The Duel!

Esco vs Metal

*Master Hand's Domain: A darkened room illuminated only by a small light source within the center of the chamber's ceiling. Metal appears from the darkness and looks towards the light*

Metal: Hey, uh... powers of the great beyond. I have a request for you!

*Silence*

Metal: Hey! Don't ignore me! I'm the Tool of Destiny! You know, the Fantom Flying Fists of Fury!

*A loud, gutteral sound eminates from above, causing the entire room to vibrate*

Metal: What do you mean it's "phantom"? How can you tell that I'm intending to say a misspelling of a word based off of only the sounds that I'm speaking?

*More guttural sounds*

Metal: C'mon, cut the nonsense and show yourself already!

*Master Hand appears, and the room instantly lights up with streaks of vibrant colors*

Master Hand: I'm just trying to make myself more imposing, what with being the creator of this universe and all.

Metal: You call that imposing? THIS is imposing! *Strikes a quick pose as a seizure-inducing red-blue strobe effect flashes in the background and a dire choir sings distorted glitch noises*

Master Hand: Damnit Metal, I don't have time for such foolishness! You should be glad I'm not epileptic or I would have personally wiped all trace of you out of existence! Now, what is your request?

Metal: I require access to the Endless Battlefield, of course!

Master Hand: ... Why do you think I would grant such a request? The Forbidden Zone is not something to be taken lightly!

Metal: Pah. It's nothing compared to the X-Zone, the Y-Zone, the I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Zone, the Zone of Alienation, Ender's Pachinko Machine Zone-

Master Hand: All right! You made your point! Here's the code to the debug menu. *Gives Metal a scrap of paper with a string of numbers and letters written on it*

Metal: Heh heh heh. You HANDed me a scrap of paper.

*Master Hand visibly cringes at the horribleness of that pun*

Master Hand: That scrap will allow you full access to the Stadium's controls. DON'T DO ANYTHING STUPID.

*Master Hand vanishes, and the room returns to its darkened state*

Metal: Stupid? Don't be silly. I'm the smartest one in this room! Surely nothing bad will happen if I hack into the fighter data and-

*The room is flooded with intense metallic sounds, causing Metal to flee quickly to the nearest exit*

*Back in the Commentator's Booth...*

Digi: Come on, Esco! There must be something going on! You want to fight in the Endless Battlefield?! You're acting even more extreme than usual!

Esco: Who says I have been acting normally in the first place? All I want right now is to fight Metal.

Kevin: Can't go wrong with that logic. I think everyone wanted to beat Metal senseless at some point.

Yesman: I didn't!

Pat: This is different. Esco's entire being is focused on this upcoming fight. I felt the same way when confronting Rex all those years ago, though that was for a righteous cause.

*Enter Metal*

Metal: I have returned... with GIFTS! ...Nah, not really. I don't get what the big deal is, anyway. After last match, it's quite clear I'm in a class of my own. Now, watch this!

*Metal walks up to a computer and begins bashing random keys with his fists*

Metal: With this code, I am the MASTER OF MY OWN DESTINY!!

Digi: *mutters* That is totally not how you do it...

ENTER PASSWORD: VBF7-P9Y6-2788D TDA5-YA0R-8947W

LOADING MATCH... LOAD COMPLETE.

*The stage appears, an endless field of grass beneath a perpetual storm*

Esco: Perfect.

Pat: Just as bleak as ever. A fitting location for a serious battle.

Metal: Well, it's time to start! The match won't begin by itself, you know! *Exits the booth*

Esco: *Turns to leave* Kevin, I give you control over the commentary during the match. You can do whatever you want with it. *Leaves*

Kevin: Thanks, Esco... Now... *Faces the crowd of SPs* I figure that it wouldn't be a problem if all of us commentate at once!

Digi: Actually, it's probably a good idea if all of us are here to watch over the match. With it taking place in the Endless Battlefield, the stakes are much higher because the damage accumulated is permanent.

Pat: Right. Let's begin the match.

*Pat, Digi, Kevin, Yesman, Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Light Bear, and Mash all gather around the thrice-reinstalled protective window, watching as the fighters enter the arena from opposing sides*

Esco: Is there anything you want to say before we begin?

Metal: I've fought horrifying super-saiyan dragons and time traveling demons. What can you POSSIBLY DO that is deadlier than them?

Esco: ...

Metal: I'm waaaaiting!

Esco: Fine. Let this be an honorable battle. It may just be your last. *Gets into a fighting stance*

Metal: If I had a nickel for every time I heard that...

Twilight Sparkle: Esco's not wasting any time, running right at Metal, and leaping in with a simple but strong jump kick! But it looks Metal counters with even greater speed, striking with his mach punches!

Metal: So much for your "mastery in concealing arts"!

Esco: Silence!

Twilight Sparkle: Esco's turning up the heat with a huge jet of green fire! But Metal's still putting on the fancy footwork, dodging with complete and total ease! It's like this is all a game to Metal...doesn't he realize how serious this is!?

Digi: Well, Esco's going to try something else, but Metal's put enough distance to leave himself out of range...and well, the ones that can reach Metal are too predictable to use effectively!

Metal: What's the matter? Can't hit me? The slow, clumsy tank that is me? All talk and no walk, eh ED?

Esco: Shut up... Just SHUT UP!!

Digi: Well, there we go, Esco gets some air and goes for Metal with a fist on fire! But Metal crouches under the move and grabs Esco by his feet. He swings him head-first into the ground repeatedly before throwing him away.

Metal: Just face it, you're not even dust compared to me. Julian Sawyer would smash you into bits with his first attack. Tell me again, just how many people have you killed again? Oh, you didn't even break a thousand? I'm not even trying and I've killed far more than you will in your lifetime! You're not even a tenth of my greatness until you've accidentally destroyed an entire dimension!

Yesman: Esco really seems to be hurting now. It seems that he was not as much of a threat to us as we thought, if Metal can take him out this easily! Why, I bet even Digi could even beat him.... Maybe.

Digi: Hey!

Light Bear: Esco barely climbs back onto his knees. He's just sitting there...

Metal: To think, of all the people that could have challenged me to a one-on-one duel, I have to fight the one who can't even fight back! There is nothing that could allow you to make even the slightest of comebacks right now!

Esco: Tell that to the wall of fire behind you.

Metal: *Turns around* Mr. Wall of fire! Esco really, really su-

Twilight Sparkle: I don't believe it! Esco is attacking with every fireball that Metal avoided before! How did he plan ahead that far? It must have taken some study.

Metal: *Wipes soot off his visor* Was that supposed to hurt?

Light Bear: No dice! Metal emerges unfazed! Looks like Esco's done for... but wait... wait, why is he unafraid, and how did he rise to his feet so suddenly?

Esco: It took a while, but I'm finally back. My assassin blood has returned to me, so now I will not lose this battle.

Metal: Bah, I drink the blood of assassins for breakfast! Your honor's going to be lost in a quick moment, silly ninja.

Digi: *mutters* Nice one, Illian Sheen...

Esco: I lost my honor a long time ago. *Takes out a kunai* But through defeating you, I will be one step closer to reclaiming it.

Yesman: Esco sinks down into the tall grass... I can't see him anymore! Oh nevermind, there he is! He reappears behind Metal and throws several ku... at Metal...

Digi: Kunai.

Yesman: Yeah... knife thingys.

Metal: Gardening tools? C'mon, you should know already. I am the master of gardening tools. You can't kill ME with them!

Rainbow Dash: I hate to admit it, but Metal's got reflexes that put me to shame, swatting that kunai right out of the sky with quick flick o' the wrist! But Esco's back in the grass again...Metal better watch himself!

Digi: There's another wave of kunai flying towards Metal, this time from the other side! Metal swats those as well, but here comes another set of them to fly at him from behind!

Metal: Go ahead and hide. I'll just charge up an attack large enough to destroy this entire arena. After all, as long as you remain hidden out there, there's no way for you to even try to hurt me!

Esco: *Rises suddenly from the grass right in front of metal* I know.

Kevin: SHAZAM!! Esco lands a perfect Mortal Kombat-style uppercut directly under the visor of Metal's helmet!

Rainbow Dash: With a satisfying clang, Metal is sent flying onto his back with that one punch. Could this be it? Unfortunately for Esco, Metal easily rises back onto his feet.

Metal: Hey! You dented my helmet! Do you know how much it's going to cost to get this fixed?

Esco: Damnit. It looks like brute force is not enough to defeat someone like Metal. There has to be a way to pry off that armor of his...

Metal: That money is going to come straight out of your paycheck!

Esco: Wait. You mean we get paid?

Digi: We get paid?

Pat: We get paid?

Yesman: *Shrugs* I thought you all knew.

Kevin: Wait, if we have salaries, then how come I haven't seen a single cent of that money?

*Wario's Secret Vault*

Wario: Wa-ha-ha! Ever since I beat that little runt in a game of poker, I've-a been living in style! *The camera pans out, revealing an landscape of riches stretching out as far as the eye can see*

Yesman: I... kinda... gambled away the Stadium funds. I have a slight problem...

Pat: You WHAT?! I'm going to report you after this match ends.

Yesman: Oh, Metal already knows about that.

Metal: *Out of earshot of the announcers* I do? ...It's not like I care, I already stole the other portion of the--er, nothing! *Does a bunch of random moves to distract people from what he just said*

Light Bear: Settle down, gentlemen! The combatants are at it again!

Rainbow Dash: Metal pulls out his TT33, which fires a monster of a slug out of it! How is that even possible, anyway? The barrel of that gun is way too small--

Digi: That bullet doesn't even come close to Esco! Either he used his telekinetic powers again, or Metal has really poor aim...considering his driving habits I wouldn't count the latter out--Esco just grabbed Metal! Now it looks like he's trying to remove Metal's armor with his TK powers! This might not be legal!

Yesman: I'm not sure either... the rules tend to change in a situation like this.

Esco: *Straining* Almost there...!

Metal: I'm not like that Samus hussy, you freak. This armor's a part of me! Although at this rate, even the remnants of my upper flesh torso could still beat you. Unarmed. Especially when you keep letting your guard down like THIS!

Rainbow Dash: Metal breaks out of the grab and quickly cuts Esco down with his laser axe! What the Hell is he thinking!?

Kevin: Esco!!

*Esco falls to the floor, a deep gash running across his chest, bleeding profusely*

Metal: Mess with the best, die like the rest! Another win for the Questers! Yeee-haw! *Shoots into the air, taking out several Stadium lights*

Esco: Damnit, it's not supposed to end like this...

*A black void; Esco floats into a patch of light, in perfect isolation from the rest of the world*

Esco: No... Not this place again... Why won't you leave me alone?

I am not the one who brought you here. You are.

Esco: What? Why would I do that?

Heh heh heh... I think you know why.

Esco: I had no other choice. If I did not come here, I would have died.

Don't tell me... you WANT me... you THOUGHT of me...

Esco: I won't!

Why must you lie and pretend? It is obvious that you need me. As you said, you have no other choice.

*Black tendrils appear and wrap around Esco, pulling him out of the light*

Esco: Agh! What are you-

Do not fight it. You shall awaken soon. Now, embrace your inner darkness, once again...

Light Bear: Hold on just a sec! He's getting back up!

*Esco slowly levitates back to his feet, his green aura now blackened, his eyes a piercing red, and his wound gone completely*

Metal: Hey! I'm the only one who's supposed to be cheating here! Oh well. I can just shoot you to death... again...

Esco: Ha... ha... haaa...

*The 2 light beings in the commentator's booth collapse to the ground in pain*

Digi: *gasps* What is it?!

Twilight Sparkle: Evil energy... overwhelming...

Rainbow Dash: Ugh...something's wrong with Esco! It's like he's overloading... he's giving me a headache in my whole body!

*Esco stares down Metal, a wild look in his eye*

Yesman: I've never seen Esco like this before! Sure, he's always been kinda dark... and scary, but never like this!

Light Bear: Metal must have finally gotten into his head... He's officially out to lunch!

Esco: Metal... Your insanity has plagued the Stadium for too long, and now it will end here.

Metal: Y'know, Garrick said that to me, and then the Questers stopped him. Mewtwo also said that, and I wound up taking the control of his Stadium from him. SIMBER tried that last time and also failed. By now, the chances of you winning are astronomically small.

Esco: You have no clue what I am capable of!

Metal: All I see is someone who wants to be like me, but can't walk the walk or talk the talk! My insanity serves a purpose here. Maybe some day you'll learn the power of paradoxical leadersh-

Esco: I kept order, Metal! Through my efforts, all of the insanity will be vanquished!

Metal: What are you, some sort of Time Cop? They said the same thing, but they couldn't catch me. You can't even control yourself, let alone me. What makes you think you can destroy my eternal insanity, anyway?

Esco: Enough of this. *Sinks into a low fighting stance*

Metal: Is that how it's gonna be? Very Well. Prepare to have your silly face smashed into a pancake! *Presses a code into his wristpad and his Time Device powers up, causing him to glow with an eerie red glow*

Light Bear: And we're back, folks! Esco starts by firing a black wisp of smoke from his palms-OH! But Metal teleports past it and grabs onto Esco, jumping into the air for a dramatic throw!

Metal: DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

Light Bear: Esco is slammed into the ground once again, only this time he's stuck! Metal gets a free hit!

Metal: DISCOKEN!!

Light Bear: Esco is singed by Metal's flaming arm, though he quickly recovers and retaliates with a spinning drill kick!

Metal: And hey, while we're cheating, how about SOME OF THIS!

Light Bear: Metal spawns his own flaming golf club. Wait, isn't that-

Metal: Digi's is a cut-rate ripoff of the real thing. Let me introduce you to the art of--FORE!!!

Digi: o_O

Twilight Sparkle: Urgh...gonna...try to...commentate...Metal's jumping at Esco...who tries to dodge...but Metal's...warping behind him and smashing that weird...fire golf club thing into Esco's backside...And this might just be because my head's spinning, but it looks like...there's two Metals...shooting sharpened...DVDs...of Gigli? Out of...some kind of weird black gun. Oh horse apples, I think I'm going to puke! *grabs paper sack from under the control panel in the booth and loses her lunch*

Digi: Uh huh...anyways, Esco's mask and hood are shredded by the DVDs and his shirt is set on fire by the golf club. Metal's making a mess out of him! There he is bleeding, and he doesn't even get a chance to move as Metal uses the time device to warp his fist into Esco's chest...who knows how many times?! The red glow fades slightly and Metal's standing over him...looks pretty exhausted.

Metal: So... y'see... you can't... beat... ME!

Yesman: Esco jumps back and prepares his next attack-

Digi: Metal's too fast! He gets a burst of speed to zoom right behind Esco! He takes out his Deathmachine--uh oh...

*At this moment, a draconic-looking wing emerges from Esco's left shoulder and swats Metal away with a quick flap*

Yesman: This is definitely not like Esco... he's like a nightmare!

Metal: Bwa? You should be dead! DEAD! Not using yet more tricks! Fine, FINE, you made me do THIS! You can tell your grandchildren about it, because I don't do this for any mere lame wad!

Digi: Hang on, Metal takes out his Star Board and starts flying around! Esco leaps around trying to get at him, only to be hit in the face with a Tri-Attack! However, Esco recovers and knocks Metal off with a nice kick, but then Metal warps above Esco and falls on him! Ouch! And to top is off, Metal smashes the rocket fire part of the skateboard into Esco's neck!

*Metal gets up, dusting his hands off, only for Esco to float back onto his feet, not even bothered by the fact that skateboard should have killed him*

Metal: Wait a minute. WAIT A MINUTE HERE. What could POSSIBLY keep you alive after that? I've killed Boba Fett Rejects with less!

Esco: Ha... ha... HA!

Light Bear: The jig is up! Esco reveals that he's been charging up several attacks this whole time! He pelts Metal with an absolute RAIN of fireballs, then violently throws him around the arena, smashing bits of his armor off of him. Metal goes to punch him again, but Esco smashes his right hand so hard it flies off entirely, leaving a sparking socket. No blood is lost, though.

Esco: ...?

Metal: Did you REALLY think my hands were made of flesh? Yes? ... ...Well then you're gonna get a SHOCK out of this!

Light Bear: Ah!! Metal stabs Esco with the socket, electrifying Esco so much he catches on fire and, for a split second, falls over, twitching.

Metal: Yeah. That's more like it. No one beats me. Not even me! You... annoying... persistent... NINJA!

Are you really that weak, Esco? To let a man with no soul and no brain smash you to death with mechanical toys?

Esco: No... no! I will not be defeated this way! Not by you, not ever!

Metal: Mwa ha ha ha ha haaa! You have no clue, do you? I am the killer of worlds! Now surrender and we can go have coffee and laugh at how foolish this was.

*Esco floats up again. Though heavily wounded, he doesn't act it at all.*

Metal: *For the first time, his smile turns to a scowl* Are you serious? You... you're like... no. You can't be him. You... you're going to DIE!

Esco: I tire of you. Time to finish this. *Pulls out a black katana, then disappears into a wall of fire*

Metal: No, no! You can't run away from me! Anyone who makes a mockery of me must di-

*Metal is suddenly impaled by a sword. Esco reappears beside Metal, clutching onto the sword in a death grip.*

Metal: URGH!

Esco: Deathblow.

Kevin: E-Esco?!

Light Bear:... DEAR ANIMATOR. He's using his Final Smash! ...In this arena, he's going to kill Metal!

*A black liquid escapes from the wound caused by the sword, slowly enveloping Metal*

Metal: Well... this is... strangely familiar... was it antimatter last time? *Bloody cough* You... can't... be... serious. I... don't.. d-*Goes limp*

Twilight Sparkle: Esco... what are you doing...?

Rainbow Dash: LISTEN, Esco! STOP RIGHT NOW! YOU'RE GOING TO KILL METAL!!

*Esco slowly distorts his face into a grotesque smile*

Esco: I KNOW.

*An explosion of a tormented energy, a physical embodiment of pain itself, fills the arena, completely blotting out the two fighters and disintegrating the protective window of the booth*

Kevin: Esco, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!?

Light Bear: AAAA

Digi: ESCOOOOOOO!!

15 Years Earlier...

...I'll never hurt them again.

*The black cloud dissipates, leaving a normal Esco standing alone in the feild as a spray of red mist rains down from above*

Esco: I did it. I AAAAing did it. He's dead.

*The arena vanishes, and the other SPs rush into the chamber*

Pat: So you finally got your wish. Are you satisfied?

Esco: . . .

Digi: ARE YOU?!

Esco: . . .

Kevin: Esco... I don't know you anymore...

Esco: Everyone get out. Leave me alone.

Light Bear: E-Esco, it doesn't have to be this way-

Esco: I WANT EVERYONE TO GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!! NOW, OR I'LL KILL YOU TOO!!

Yesman: Guys we should listen to him. There's no point in trying to save him now. He's long gone.

*All the SPs leave, save for one*

Twilight Sparkle: Esco... I know it's not your fault. You are not the same as that curse-spawned nightmare that killed Metal. I want to forgive...

Esco: ... How in the Hell can you possibly forgive me? After all the Hell I put you through!

Twilight Sparkle: I know it sounds strange, but I-

*Esco grips Twilight Sparkle by the neck and holds her up to his face, locking his eyes with hers*

Esco: I DESPISE YOU. YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME. YOU WILL NEVER REPLACE XALESS. REMEMBER THIS, AND LEAVE.

*Esco throws her violently to the ground*

Twilight Sparkle: *Shaken up* Just when I thought I believed in you...

*Exit Twilight Sparkle*

*Rainbow Dash flies in Esco's face, looks angry, opens her mouth like she's going to say something....but then just frowns sadly, before slowly flying away.*

Esco: ... *starts singing melancholically to himself* Daybreak, at the bottom of a lake it's a hundred degrees I can't breathe...

*Digi, Pat, Light Bear, Yesman, and Kevin are in Metal's Office, trying to let the prior events sink in*

Digi: I can't believe it. Just as I was finally starting to get used to him, bam. He's gone.

Pat: Yeah. I knew that Esco was trouble from the beginning, but I didn't expect him to be able to kill Metal. Damnit...

Light Bear: W-well, wait a second! Didn't the Time Lord kill him earlier? Maybe we could just get Master Hand to revive him again!

Pat: It won't work.

Kevin: Why not?

Digi: Interdimensional conflict. He used a technique that was so blatantly defiant towards the laws of this world that it rejects the very concept of revival. Several Questers have been wiped out completely by the same kinds of techniques. Hey Pat, remember Gibby?

Pat: Yeah. He showed so much potential, too. A shame.

Kevin: Well, what do we do now?

Digi: The only thing we can do. We have to keep the Stadium running. It's what Metal would have wanted.

Yesman: Well, I can't work without someone to work for! Who will be the new head SP?

Pat: I'll do it.

Digi: Pat? I thought you didn't like being the leader.

Pat: I don't, but for Metal's sake, I have to. I'm the only remaining SP from the VGW era, so I'm the only one who knows the extent of Metal's vision for the Stadium.

Light Bear: ...Whatever the case, I refuse to allow the Stadium to fall into disrepair again! You have my word.

Kevin: It sounds like a good idea. You have my support.

Yesman: And my axe!

*Digi smacks Yesman upside the head*

Digi: Come on Yesman, this is serious!

Yesman: Sorry.

Pat: All right, I will begin my duties as Head SP. Now that that's settled, you are all dismissed.

*Everyone leaves except for Kevin*

Kevin: Hey Pat, no hard feelings after that match earlier today, right?

Pat: I suppose.

Kevin: Now, I know that this might not be a good time, but I was wondering if I could be an SP. Metal said he would do something after his match, but...

Pat: I understand. I will grant you full SP-ship.

Kevin: Wait, really?

Pat: Yes. Now that Esco's off doing God knows what, there's an empty space that you'll fit perfectly into. If we want to keep the Stadium alive, we'll need all the help we can get.

Kevin: Thank you, Pat! I owe you one! *Leaves*

Pat: *Sigh*... Now, where to begin...

*Mario and Luigi are walking down a hallway in the deepest depths of the Stadium, discussing their future*

Luigi: Mama mia! Ever since-a those new guys showed up, we've-a been reduced to bit parts!

Mario: I know what you mean-a, Luigi. We need to get-a back into the spotlight!

Luigi: Wait a second... I think I hear-a something down-a the hall.

Mario: You're right!

*Esco's Room*

Esco: *Facing Ridley* Why are you here?

Ridley: You should know why I'm here. I must congratulate you, Ninja. You have finally killed the one man who stood between us and our ambitions. As promised, I present to you my... tampered sample.

*Ridley hands Esco a small syringe with a black liquid-like substance inside*

Ridley: With this, all of your troubles will go away, just like that. *snaps his claws*

Esco: Very well. *Inserts the syringe into his arm, absorbing its contents into his body* So this is how it feels to be without a single care in the world... Ack!

*Esco collapses to the floor and starts convulsing intensely*

Ridley: As I speak, these nanoparasites are feeding off of your dark energy. Within the next few hours, I will be in possession of the very thing that keeps you alive.

Esco: *Succumbing to an intense pain corsing through his entire body* W-why... did... you...?!

Ridley: You should've learned never to trust the word of a Space Pirate! Now that the Metal Man is out of the way, I have no need for you. As such, I no longer care whether you live or die, as long as I am able to complete the mission I was assigned. If, for some reason, you manage to survive, I recommend that you stay out of my business from now on.

*Ridley exits the chamber, leaving Esco to suffer alone in the darkness*

*Back outside, Mario and Luigi take cover behind a corner*

Luigi: *Whispering* I don't-a think he saw us.

Mario: Good. Luigi, you know what-a this means? We have a-something on our hands!

Luigi: We have-a to go tell the others!

*Mario and Luigi rush towards the nearest elevator, eager to become important in the Stadium once again.*

*Meanwhile, in an unknown location, a cloaked figure surrounded by a black cloud creeps through the night into a nondescript opening inside a small alcove beneath a small stone spire*

?: *Coming from within* Ah, I see you have finally returned. Tell me, how went the attack on the White Lands?

????: Perfectly. These parasites contain great powers; an entire population's worth in light energy!

?: Excellent. This has gone far better than I could have possibly comprehended.

????: Oh, there's more... *Produces a small brown bag from his cloak*

?: What's this? *Opens it up* My, you really have outdone yourself this time! Tell the others to prepare their weaponry. Tomorrow morning, we shall set out for Smashtopia.

*The camera focuses on the eyes of the leader; two sharp, pale, unforgiving eyes, permanently fixated on the chamber's entrance, waiting for the rising sun to signal the beginning of the end.*