Fighters for Jungle Japes: Peach vs. Zelda
*One week after Metal's death and Esco's disappearance, the remaining superpowers, Mash Toady, and Rainbow Dash are gathered in the staff lounge, standing in a circle as they discuss the results of Pat's first view days as Head SP*
Light Bear: Well, Pat, I've got to hand it to you, you've really outdone yourself.
Yesman: Yeah, we're starting to actually gain income!
Kevin: We've even been able to start paying the fighters' salaries again!
Mash: I'm just glad things aren't looking as apocalyptic as they were last week.
Rainbow Dash: I'll second that.
Digi: For once, I'll have to agree with Dash on this one.
Pat: Thanks guys. Just doing my job.
Twilight: Oh come on, Pat, don't be so modest! Thanks to you, the stadium doesn't look like it's being run by-
Mewtwo: *teleports into the room with a huge purple flash, hovering above all present* IDIOTS! COMPLETE IDIOTS! Do you realize the gravity of your utter failure!?
Twilight: *noticeably terrified* Um. Hi again...Mr. Alternate Mewtwo...sir.
Digi: Ah jeez, here we go.
Pat: Is there a problem, Mewtwo? I assume that something has stirred you from your everlasting sleep?
Mewtwo: A problem? A PROBLEM? How could Metal Man be so stupid as to keep a man with obvious intent to kill him employed? How could all of you brainless troglodytes do nothing but add to the stupidity? Do you have any idea how far the repercussions of a man with as much undeserved power and influence as Metal could reach?
Yesman: Not really, no.
Mewtwo: THE ENTIRE MULTIVERSE IS NOW AT RISK! Metal Man's disregard for his own safety has put all of reality at risk! It didn't use to be this way! Stadium matters were simple, once! Wolfman sent the morons on missions, and then I punished the morons when they inevitably screwed up!
Light Bear: ...Wolfman?
Digi: One of VGW's...other selves. It's kind of complicated.
Mewtwo: But no! Wolfman chose a tin can with tapioca for brains to succeed him and... ARGH!!! You managed to get my other self in this realm obliterated, too, didn't you?
Kevin: Nope, he's still breathing.
Mash: Meditating, even.
Mewtwo: Well, I suppose even a stopped clock is right twice a day... Speaking of time, I've wasted enough of it as is. I'm taking over... starting with those irritating ponies! *His eyes start to flash yellow* Obey my whims, imbeciles!
Rainbow Dash: What a joke! We're not going let this dork treat us like a bunch of puppets, right Twilight?
Rainbow Dash: Uh...Twi?
Twilight: *scowls unnaturally* Shut up, Dash! No one calls my master a dork!
Rainbow Dash: That...wasn't the answer I was looking for. Oh well...Here I go! *takes flight, charges at Mewtwo and headbutts him in the stomach*
Mewtwo: Urgh! How dare you defy me! How are you even resisting? *grabs Rainbow Dash with his telekinesis*
Rainbow Dash: Heh...it only worked last time because I was out of my head. My will is stronger now...the only reason Twi was left vulnerable was because she instantly respected you. *smirks* You ain't earned any respect from me! *struggles for a few moments before breaking his hold on her and charging at him*
Mewtwo: I'm going to take all your coins away for this, you arrogant blue pest!
*Rainbow Dash and Mewtwo charge at each other, Dash covered in a rainbow colored battle aura, and Mewtwo in a deep, rage filled crimson one, the two of them colliding in midair, pressing their foreheads against each other*
Pat: KAMEHAME...HA! *creates a gust of wind between his hands, then ignites it with burning light, creating a beam that sails towards Rainbow Dash and Mewtwo, knocking both of them to the ground*
Twilight: *shakes her head and blinks her eyes, phasing out of Mewtwo's mind control*
Rainbow Dash: Ugh...*slowly rises to her feet and looks at Pat* What was that?
Pat: The most advanced of all air bending techniques...the Kamehameha Wave.
Mewtwo: *manages to float up to his feet, with some difficulty* Grrrr... It seems that you've gained some strength since I last saw you, Pat of SSS.
Pat: I need to be prepared for anything. Dash, I appreciate your willingness to defend our cause, but your anger is misplaced. Right now, I need Mewtwo just as much as I need you.
Rainbow Dash: Hmm...all right. Fair enough.
Pat: Mewtwo, I will pass on the title of Head SP to you. You are better suited for it. But keep in mind that you cannot function alone. A leader is nothing without anyone to lead. It's acceptable for you to be strict, but you'll doom us all if you're reckless.
Mewtwo: Those are my words you are using, Pat. Are you just repeating everything I say like you used to do? I am going to get very angry if you do that aga--
Pat: You are going to get very angry if--er, whoops! *Tugs his collar nervously*
Mewtwo: Now, as much as I loathe you parroting my own advice back to me, I have no other logical choice but to heed my own words. With that in mind, I shall arrange a new match immediately.
*Mario and Luigi burst into the room*
Mario: Guys, there's big trouble going down!
Luigi: Yeah, there's big a danger cooking a up with Ridl-
Mewtwo: NOT NOW! THIS IS A PRIVATE MEETING! *teleports Mario and Luigi out of the Stadium and creates the infamous giant purple barrier he uses to keep out intruders around it*
Pat: *raises an eyebrow, frowning in slight annoyance at Mewtwo*
Mewtwo: *looks over at Pat* You know what happens to people who annoy me. You yourself tasted my barrier, and now that I have it back, I have no reason not to use it again. But enough of that. Let us continue. *looks over at Twilight* You there! Purple being! Twilight Splash, or whatever your name is?
Twilight: Uh...yes sir?
Mewtwo: Set up a match between Princess Zelda and Princess Peach in the Melee arena known as Jungle Japes. Allow no items or extra life. I want a short, sweet throwback to Wolfman's time at Melee Stadium, where my word was law.
Twilight: S...Sure. Would it be all right if-
Mewtwo: I have already read your mind and know your response. Commentate on the battle yourself, or get someone else to do it, I don't care. Just get out of my sight and make sure the broadcast occurs. Or else you'll join the other rejects on the wrong side of my anti-intruder field!
Twilight: *smiling nervously* Er...righty...o! Bye! *winks out of the room with a bang and a flash*
*Meanwhile, Mario and Luigi are shooting fireballs at the force field Mewtwo set up, to no avail*
Mario: Mama Mia! It's a thicker than a clogged a drain pipe!
Luigi: What do we do now Mario?
Mario: We've got to a find another way in, somehow!
Sonic: *bursts onto the scene, making a thunderous sonic boom as he does, skidding to a halt near where Mario and Luigi are* The heck you guys doing out here?
Tails: *floats into view* They must be spies sent by Mewtwo to stop us!
Mario: Hey, you're a the spies! *leaps in the air, performing his Super Jump Punch*
Sonic: We'll see about that! *performs his Triple Spin, rotating his body twice in a midair somersault before creating a small force field around him on the third spin*
Luigi: I'm a knocking you down! Here's a one from the original neglected a sidekick! *launches headfirst into his Green Missile attack
Tails: *glares angrily at Luigi* Hey, I'm more neglected than you are, these days! *Spin Dashes at Luigi*
*Mario and Sonic crash into each other, as do Luigi and Tails. The four fighters groan as they are knocked to the ground*
Tails: Ow...ow...um, guys...I think there's been a little misunderstanding.
Luigi: I think I broke my everything.
Sonic: Nah, it just feels that way. *runs over to Luigi and helps him up*
Luigi: Thanks, I a needed that.
Mario: *leaps to his feet and helps Tails up*
Tails: Thanks Mario...so, um...the first order of business is figuring out why we're all out here in the first place.
Mario: Did you guys get thrown out by Mewtwo like we did?
Sonic: Yeah, we told him where the staff lounge was, and then he warped us like, six kilometers from here. We're pretty fast, so it didn't take us long to get back, but geez...that was a real jerk move to punish us for helping. I don't understand people like that.
Mario: I can get behind that, but there's a bigger a problems to worry about.
Tails: Bigger problems?
Luigi: Ridley, that dragon guy, he's a planning to put us all six feet under!
Tails: I always had a bad feeling about him. He was a real pain during that match back in Cloudsdale.
Sonic: Yeah, Pixel Brain's right, that guy's been a bad egg since day one. We need to be ready to stop him.
Tails: But how are we going to do that if we can't get back in?
Mario: We'll a just have to wait for an a opening. Even that Mewtwo guy can't stay angry forever.
Luigi: I'm not so sure about that...but it's a our only a chance.
Sonic: Well, in that case guys, let's scout the area for clues until we get a shot at getting back in.
*Sonic speeds off, with Tails and the Mario Bros. following far behind*
*Meanwhile, back at the Stadium*
Twilight: *walks into the commentary booth* Fillies and Gentlecolts...I'm kinda busy with a...personal project. So, filling in for me today will be a guest from Kongo Bongo Island, whom I have taken the liberty to pay in advance. Please give a warm welcome to...Bluster Kong.
*A male gorilla with a slick, well groomed hairstyle and tiny, yet also well groomed mustache walks into the booth*
Bluster: I assure you, my dear Twilight, that my highest priority is making good on my end of our mutual transaction.
Twilight: Thank you Bluster. Well, everypony, I'm off. Enjoy the match. *winks out*
Bluster: Greetings, fair viewers. It is with great pleasure that I greet you on this fine day to introduce, and elaborate upon, a battle between two distinguished monarchs in the natural beauty of a most exquisite tourist attraction native to my homeland, the famous "Jungle Japes". The first, the majestic Princess Zelda, has arrived most promptly upon the leftmost side of the middle most wooden platform, gazing upon an orb of tremendous mystic power which she has conjured with the highest caliber of arcane ability.
On the rightmost side of the carefully crafted middle platform, the brave and kindly Princess Peach Toadstool floats on the wind using naught but the power of an elegant powerful to traverse the winds. With that, our royal guests stare into the eyes of one another, and by doing so, they pierce the very fabric of their souls as a fierce passion like none other courses through their blue blood.
Which of course, means that there is no longer time for dilly dallying. The stage is set, the players are arranged, and now the battle must be joined. Without any further interruption or delay, I dare proclaim...let the conflict...commence!
|Need one hundred thousand exploding barrels? Why not choose Bluster's Barrels?|
Bluster: Young Zelda rushes forth with maddeningly high velocity, mystical sparks blazing forth from her finger tips as both palms are thrust violently into Peach's midsection. A true warrior monarch is not so easily dispatched, however, and Peach draws her blunt golfing instrument and strikes with alarming force into Zelda's jaw, knocking the fair lady to the floor.
As Peach rushes at the fallen Zelda, she is suddenly met with several sapphire slashes, courtesy of the "Naryu's Love" spell, a choice maneuver documented in many volumes of textual wisdom.
Zelda wisely continues her onslaught, assaulting young Toadstool with small but stunningly effective mystical bursts from a single palm, retaining all of her royal dignity even while meeting the need for the most medieval application of unfathomably painful violence.
The tables are then yet again turned as Peach takes advantage of the other young lady's moment of hesitation, revealing young Master Toad, whose spores engulf Zelda like a ravenous throng of locusts, sending her to the leftmost small platform.
|Snapple. Made from the most confusing stuff on earth.|
Bluster: Zelda has chosen to undergo an extraordinary metamorphosis into her more sleek, slender, and aerodynamic alter ego, Sheik. She leaps back onto the larger platform with the greatest of ease, and flings many sharp, diminutive implements at Peach's body, before readying another assault with dreadfully accurate precision, striking her fellow monarch with a curious whip like weapon constructed of the most flexible metallic alloy that mine eyes have ever born witness to. With a literally shocking electrical discharge from its tip, the weapon propels Princess Toadstool onto the rightmost plank of expertly carved wood.
One cannot keep one of such sophistication down for long, however, and Peach floats back into the middle of the arena by utilizing a mysterious ethereal power, before plummeting with such speed that Princess Zelda has no time at all to react before being stabbed with great enthusiasm by the tip of of young Toadstool's parasol.
|Be sure to tune in next time for another installment of Party Preparation for the Posh and Polite.|
Bluster: It appears that the battle may soon be won by the wizardry and resourcefulness of young Zelda. Despite the generous beating she has just recovered from, Princess Zelda remains blessed with a lower damage percentage than her adversary, and is, as the parasol carries young Toadstool to the floor, able to quickly ignite a thrown ball of flame right in Peach's royal visage.
There is little time for celebration, however, as Peach is able to bend the laws of the universe to her will with such astounding efficiency that she pulls several turnips out of the wooden floor and tosses them into Zelda's torso with great haste. As an aside, I may add that turnips make a rather splendid ingredient in a stew.
Zelda begins to perform a teleportation spell of some sort, but is unlucky enough to be met with a sudden interruption before the technique's completion. Peach's royal posterior is propelled into the whole of Zelda's being, causing a surprisingly lovely display of heart shaped light flashes, and knocking Zelda off the leftmost edge of our long utilized middle platform.
|For the latest news hot off the presses, there's no one like Hector Ramirez!|
Bluster: And this confrontation draws to a close as Zelda is dragged from our view by a small crocodile with absurdly large jaws, commonly known as a "Klaptrap." Princess Zelda put up a herculean effort, but even so, the day belongs to the victorious Toadstool.
And with that, our presentation is also complete. I bid you well, fare viewers, for now I shall retire. *walks out of the commentary booth*
*Meanwhile, Twilight is alone in her and Dash's room, sitting at a vanity, looking in a mirror*
Twilight: Sigh...I still can't believe Metal's dead.
Twilight's Reflection: What do you care? He never showed any signs of caring about you.
Twilight: *glares at her reflection* That's not the point! He was teaching me things, in his own way! And we could have been close, given time!
Twilight's Reflection: Right, like how things turned out with Esco?
Twilight: SHUT UP! I may be angry at Esco...really angry, but...that doesn't mean I've stopped wishing things could be different!
Twilight's Reflection: Same old Twi, wishing for things while changing nothing.
Twilight: CHANGING NOTHING? Do you honestly think I haven't made a single difference since I was born? Do you honestly think the world would be better off without me?
Twilight's Reflection: All right, fine. So you made some changes. But why would anyone trust you? Do you really think your parents weren't afraid of your power? What you might become someday? Spoiling you because of what they thought you'd do to-
Twilight: WHAT? Starlight and Nightlight knew how to take care of me! Just because they showed me the deepest of kindness, even when I was being punished, doesn't mean they were scared of me!
Twilight's Reflection: Than why did they cart you off to the Sun Goddess?
Twilight: I wasn't "carted off!" I was given a privilege!
Twilight's Reflection: Oh, yes, such a great privilege. Is that why you were terrified of your own mentor?
Twilight: Can you even keep your own arguments consistent? Either I'm scary or I'm weak, pick one! I was only dumb enough to be afraid of Celly...of the Princess because I was foolish enough to assume the worst of her, to think that cruelty is the same thing as kindness, despite everything my parents taught me! It's why I wouldn't listen to Spike when we was feeling horrible about himself, why I yelled at him when I should have been listening! It's why I'll never do that again!
Twilight's Reflection: Oh, blah, blah, blah. You're nothing but a selfish failure who is just going to keep failing until-
Twilight: What do you know? You're not even real! You're a voice in my head that's repeating all my worst fears to me! I know nothing you say has any connection to reality, because if it did, you'd be given me new information, not just parroting the same nonsense I already overcame with the help of people who know me a hay of a lot better than you do! *Her eyes flash with grey fire momentarily before changing back to normal* What do you have to say to that?
Twilight's Reflection: I...I...well, um. Can...Can I have a minute?
Twilight: No! BUZZ OFF! *fires a laser beam from her horn at the mirror, shattering it, then sobs into her hooves for a few moments before calming down* Okay...keep it together. Keep...it...TOGETHER!. I'm okay...I'm okay.
Pinkie Pie: *enters the room, looking concerned* ...Hey Twi.
Twilight: ...Hi Pinkie.
Pinkie Pie: Having...a breakdown in here?
Twilight: K-kind of.
Pinkie Pie: I think I might be able to help a little. Dashie always tells me that sometimes a good fight is a great way to work of extra stress.
Twilight: *makes a small smile and hops out of her chair, then rises to her hind legs* You might be right.
Pinkie Pie: *rises to her hind legs as well* Get ready, I've gotten a little faster. *jabs twice at Twilight*
Twilight: *blocks with her forelegs, then tries to trip Pinkie with a sweep kick*
Pinkie Pie: *dodges with a leap in to the air, then tries to toss an electrified cupcake at Twilight*
Twilight: *fires a starbolt into the cupcake, causing an explosion that knocks both Pinkie and herself down* Ack...that didn't prove much.
Pinkie Pie: Ungh...but you feel better? *starts standing up, rising to all fours*
Twilight: *chuckles* A little, yeah. Thanks Pinkie.
*A bang is heard and in a blue flash, Trixie appears*
Trixie: Twi, I've got some bad news.
Twilight: What is it, Trixie? *rises up and stands on all fours*
Trixie: I tried to contact our mentors like you asked me, but my telepathy can't reach Luna or Celestia at all. Something's...off. It's like there's no trace of pony magic left anywhere in Equestria.
Twilight: *stares in shock* That...ominous. But I'm pretty sure that whatever it is, Ridley's behind it. We'd better get going.
Trixie: *smirks* You don't have to tell me twice. Even if it end up being her last show, Trixie Lulamoon will be right by your side! *winks out*
Twilight: Well...this is it Pinkie.
Pinkie Pie: I don't think it'll be so bad. I can kinda vaguely tell the future, so at least we won't get lost.
Twilight: Look, Pinkie, I um...in case this is...the last time I see you, could I-
Pinkie Pie: *immediately hugs Twilight*
Twilight: *hugs Pinkie back tight* Thanks Pinkie. I know I don't always understand you, but I'm glad you've always been there for me.
*Several hours later, Twilight has assembled all the members of her team, all of them looking at a wall that Twilight has directed them to. Fighter has brought his sword and shield, while Rainbow Dash has donned a tan and green disc shaped hat.*
Twilight: Okay guys, if my research is correct, this seeming inconspicuous wall where Ridley's room used to be isn't a wall at all, but is actually a realistic hard light holographic illusion meant to throw us off Ridley's trail. It should fade away with a simple-
Applejack: *bucks the wall with her back legs, and within seconds, a large opening is seen where the fake wall was, a broken holo-emitter smoking on the ground*
Twilight: -tap. Uh...well, that was more than a tap, but it was effective. Thank you AJ.
Applejack: Glad ta do it!
*The team heads down the hallway, then manage to cram themselves into a single elevator, before finally reaching Ridley's base of operations.*
Twilight: *looks down the shaft beneath the elevator, seeing many platforms leading to the bottom.* Okay...normally I'd be worried about, and even afraid of how high we are, but we should be able to get down there safely and easily without much trouble.
*Twilight and Trixie carefully teleport from one platform to another, making sure not to warp too far in case of traps, Rainbow, Fluttershy, and Gilda fly down, and the rest of the jumps down carefully*
Twilight: Whoo! Finally, we're at the bottom!
Pinkie Pie: *starts shaking violently*
Twilight: What is it Pinkie?
Pinkie Pie: There's a trap nearby. Real nearby.
Rainbow Dash: Then I'm scouting ahead!
Twilight: RAINBOW, NO!
Rainbow Dash: *floats in front of Twilight, looking serious* Twi...this is something I need to do, whether it kills me or not.
Twilight: Dash, come on, I-
Rainbow Dash: *gets a sad, pleading look on her face* Twi, I told you from the beginning that I'd find a way to stick around, even without a body. You need to trust me.
Twilight: *takes a deep breath.* All right.
Rainbow Dash: *flies forward, lands in front of the door to the next room, and starts dropping through a trap door filled with spikes*
Gilda: I gotcha! *grabs onto one of Dash's forelegs, and carries her onto the other side of the pit, safely in front of the blue, dome like door*
Rainbow Dash: *stares at Gilda in surprise, then frowns sadly and looks away* This doesn't change anything.
Gilda: *closes her eyes and hangs her head* I know.
Pinkie Pie: *takes a cartoonish looking round black bomb out of nowhere and tosses it into the pit, the explosion disintegrating the spikes.* Hop,*leaps forward*, skip, *leaps into the pit*, and jump!*leaps next to Dash and Gilda* Coast is clear, everypony!
Gilda: *slashes the door open with her claws*
*After a few minutes of Pinkie guiding everyone through the maze with her sixth sense, rows of metal columns are suddenly seen blocking everyone's way*
Twilight: Those columns are filled with a fuel source called Zebetite! If my research is correct, this energy source is always well guarded...meaning we'll have to find a way to get past tons of laser cannons while trying to destroy those the columns! But how-
Rarity: Elementary, darling. Stand back and watch the magic. *levitates a gem to the top of the closest column, causing it to fire and hit the gem...causing the laser to be filtered through the gem, bouncing off the walls, setting off the other lasers in the room, and totally destroying all the cannons and columns, leaving an empty hallway for the team to travel through*
Twilight: Um...okay then. That was...incredibly clever, Rarity.
Rarity: *smirks* A lady needs more tricks up her sleeve than charms, Twi.
Twilight: That does sound like a good point...Anyway, I'd better knock down that door. *runs up to a red dome like door and fires a starbolt at it* What? Nothing happened!
Trixie: *runs up next to Twilight* I think my moonbeams should be more than helpful.
Twilight: *rolls her eyes and sighs, then slowly starts to smile at Trixie* All right. Together, than.
*Trixie fires several blue crescent shaped energy projectiles at the door while Twilight shoots at it with her usual straight line shaped lasers. The door pops open*
Twilight: All right. This is it. No turning back. Now or never.
*The team goes through the door and into another elevator, until they finally reach Ridley's hidden lab. Twilight rushes in first, with the others following behind her*
Ridley: What? No! I couldn't have been found out! Not when I'm so close!
Twilight: I'm sorry it has to be this way, Ridley, but you're too dangerous to allow to live.
Ridley: Worry about your own life, girl! *shoots a giant fireball out of his mouth towards Twilight*
Twilight: I wish, I wish, I wish! *winks out, the fireball sailing through empty air as Twilight teleports herself and the other out of Ridley's view*
Ridley: Don't think you'll survive so easily!
Fighter: *runs forward and punches Ridley into the ceiling with a gloved hand* Zeus Gauntlet!
Ridley: Argh! *flies down and lands in front of Fighter* Who the hell are you?
Fighter: Justice will always prevail! Shining Wave! *strikes his sword down, sending an energy wave traveling through the floor and towards Ridley*
Ridley: *flies upward* Hah, pathetic! Did you even think-AGH! *gets hit from below as the wave erupts from the ground up into a beam*
Fighter: Radiant Sword! *points his sword at Ridley, and shoots several copies of it, made of energy, out of the blade's tip, the copies exploding as they stab Ridley*
Ridley: Rarrr! I'm going to make you pay! *blows a giant stream of fire down at Fighter*
Fighter: Shield of Light! *blocks the fire with his shield, then fires a giant beam from the shield that consumes the flames and slams into Ridley*
Ridley: Im...possible! *crashes to the ground*
Fighter: And finally...GLORIOUS...CHAINSAW...METHOD! *transforms the blade of his sword into an energy chainsaw that grows in length until it is several meters longer than Fighter's own body, and brings it crashing down on Ridley's forehead*
Ridley: EEEEENOUGH!!! *after a few moments of being cut by the chainsaw, Ridley grabs the energy blade, presses his claws into it, causing it to be extinguished, and Fighter's sword to return to normal. He then shoots three small fireballs at Fighter that bounce on the floor*
Fighter: *gets got off guard and knocked over the fireballs bounce into him, running away as he realizes that he needs to go on the defensive*
Ridley: Coward! Wait, what the? *looks up and notices Fluttershy on his head*
Fluttershy: Hi there, mister dragon! I'm just going to mess with your brain a little, this should hurt too much! *uses her staring ability, looking into Ridley's eyes with an angry glare to try and crush his mind into submission*
Ridley: *struggles in pain for a few moments before grabbing Fluttershy with one of his hands* You...insolent fool! *flings Fluttershy into a wall*
Fluttershy: Unnngh. *Her facial features warp into a twisted grin as she floats up in the air* How about a little song! *blasts Ridley with a shot of sonic energy from her mouth*
Ridley: *topples over*
Fluttershy: *lands on top of Ridley's head again, this time gripping it with her wings tightly, and punching it repeatedly* Ha ha ha! Die,die! Decompose, decompose, decom-
Ridley: This...is...ridiculous!!! *stands up and blasts Fluttershy with a giant fireball*
Fluttershy: *falls to the ground, coughing up some smoke, returning to her gentle personality* Ow...*smiles happily despite recovering from the pain* Your turn, Pinkie.
Ridley: *gets hit from behind by several balloons filled with soda, all exploding on impact* Who dares!? *turns around and looks behind him*
Pinkie Pie: Party Cannon! I never leave home without it!
Ridley: I'm going to burn you to a cinder, you little-AUGH! *suddenly feels a huge mass of sharp gems cutting against his body, propelled by a glowing telekinetic aura* How many of you people are there!? *looks in the direction the gems came from*
Rarity: *waves her behind up in the air at Ridley, wagging her tail as she does* This a little unladylike of me, but...You can't catch me, you can't caaatch me! Ha ha!
Ridley: Why you little- *tries to slash Rarity with his wings, missing a few times, but then finally slashing her to the ground*
Rarity: Oof! Well, it looks like it's time for somepony else to come in!
Ridley: No one is going to save you from-*gets tugged away by a lasso at the end of Applejack's tail*
Applejack: Howdy! *removes the lasso and uppercuts Ridley into the ceiling* Heh heh, don't come back, ya here?
Ridley: *starts to fly downwards, lunges at Applejack, and rakes his teeth against her, knocking her down. He then stops and catches his breath* I can't believe-nyagh! *notices Trixie shooting moonbeams at him from below*
Trixie: Pretty neat spell, huh?
Ridley: *blasts Trixie away with a giant fireball, flies quickly towards the floor and stomps it with enough force that it knocks down everyone in the room, then covers himself in a bright green battle aura* I'm going to murder all of you, and then I'm going to eat you!
Gilda: Game on! *leaps at Ridley and tries to hit him in the head with a flying kick*
Ridley: A useless attempt! *is protected from the kick by his battle aura, and grabs Gilda by one of her feline back legs, smashing her head into the floor*
Gilda: Ugh...well, that was bogus. But I'm more rad then you think, dude. *starts slashing at Ridley with her claws*
Ridley: *starts slashing back, neither combatant able to get a hit on each other as there claws loud collide*
Gilda: That all you got?
Ridley: *finally manages to slash Gilda's chest*
Gilda: Urrrgh...you're good...but I'm better! *dips the claws on of her hands into the wound* BLADES...OF...BLOOD! *tosses her own blood in three crescent shapes, which then ignite with energy*
Ridley: What? No, my aura! *the blades cut through his aura and knock him to the ground*
Gilda: He's all yours, Dash!
*Rainbow Dash flies into view, right in front of Ridley*
Rainbow Dash: *smirks* Didja miss me Ridley?
Ridley: YOU. I DON'T HOW, BUT I KNOW THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!! *scream violently, cybernetic implants appearing on his body, transforming him into Meta Ridley*
Rainbow Dash: Ah come on, guy, don't be that way, the game's just starting! *flies quickly in circles around Ridley as he tries to slash her with his tail*
Ridley: Stop...moving...around! *finally slices Dash away*
Rainbow Dash: Un...I'll admit, that hurt! But I still ain't bleeding much, buddy, you're going to have to try harder!
Ridley: EYAAAGH! *flaps his metallic wings hard and sends gale force winds at Dash...which she starts pushing against with wind from her own wings* How...how can you be doing ths !?
Rainbow Dash: Heh, it's a good thing I specifically trained for wing power weeks before I went on this mission!
Ridley: No! *falls over* YOU CAN'T DESTROY ME!!! *fires several heat seeking missiles out of his mouth*
Rainbow Dash: That's my cue to go! POWER DRILL! *covers herself in rainbow colored energy and spins around as she dives head first into the floor, the missiles following her through the hole as she does*
Ridley: Finally, she's dead...wait, why wasn't there an explos-
Rainbow Dash: *flies out of the hole, smirking to herself* Ridley, I believe these belong to you. *flies towards Ridley, the missiles following her, until she's right in front of Ridley, then flies directly upward, letting the missiles hit Ridley and explode*
Ridley: *groans on the ground* ...why...why...how could she...she's too young to-
Rainbow Dash: *lands near Ridley, chuckling* You know, Ridley, that was a cool trick. But homing missiles aren't always as useful as they look. They're kinda going out of style these days.
Ridley: YOU...COCKY...LITTLE...BASTARD!!! *charges his Kinetic Breath Weapon in his mouth, ready to fire*
Rainbow Dash: *takes off her hat with a forehoof and tosses it as Ridley's mouth, forcing it closed, and causing Ridley's beam weapon to explode inside of him, filling him full of holes. The hat then travels back to her hoof, and Rainbow puts it back on her head.*
Ridley: ...a curse upon all of you...*falls lifelessly to the ground*
Twilight: Good job guys. It's over. Ridley...is no more.
Trixie: Even I'm impressed. This was a brilliant plan you came up with, Twi.
Twilight: Actually...it was Rainbow's plan. *blushes*
Trixie: What!? Dash!? *looks over at Rainbow Dash in shock*
Rainbow Dash: *chuckles* I've always wanted to see that look on your face.
Trixie: *looks angry for a moment, then sighs and smiles* Well, I stand by what I said. That was brilliant, wearing the powerful foe down gradually, angering him enough that he wouldn't be able to attack properly.
Rainbow Dash: Heh, well, messing with people is just kinda what I do sometimes.
Stadium Alert System: WARNING. CRITICAL SECURITY BREACH.
Twilight: What? But how? We saw Ridley die! But...in any case, we've got to defend the Stadium! Here we go!
Trixie: I don't know where we're going, but I guess we're going!
*Twilight and Trixie touch their horns together and use their combined power to teleport the team out of Ridley's base*