March #24: The Stadium Strikes Back!

Twilight: Spike, I'm...I'm so sorry...I'm so stupid.

Gilda: Huunng! *explodes out of a pile of rubble, takes to the air, and lands in front of Twilight* You're pathetic, you know that?

Twilight: *remains silent*

Gilda: You're a terrible, terrible excuse for a person. You mindlessly serve Celestia, with no idea if she'll just toss you out any time she wants like yesterday's trash.

Twilight: *mutters incoherently, trying to ignore Gilda*

Gilda: You don't actually care about anyone. Not Spike, not Dash, or those Superpower guys- you're just in it for your ego. To make everyone think you're smart. Well look what it got you. A mountain of corpses. *tosses Spike's lifeless body at Twilight's forehead, the dragon's limp form bouncing off Twi with a thump*

Twilight: RRRARGH...*starts to glow with gray fire, nightmarish images of taunting faces flowing through her head*

*In Twilight's mind*

Face of Seraphis: She served her purpose quite well, didn't she?

*A bearded, dragon like horse face appears to replace Seraphis*

Face of Discord: My my, yes, such, a delightful, self-centered piece of work!

*An equine, yet insectoid head with green hair appears to replace Discord*

Face of Crysalis: A girl after my own heart, ha ha, ha!

*The face of Princess Celestia takes Crysalis' place*

Celestia: After all I tried to teach you, you have still learned nothing. You will have much to think about, as you live out your well-deserved punishment...a lifetime of solitude!

*back in reality*

Twilight: Don't you dare talk that way to me were my second mother...I gave eveything for you, everything...I loved you! And I'll keep loving you whether you like it or not!!!

Gilda: Well, are you going to say something, dweeb, or not?

Twilight: ...even if the world turns against me, I will fight as I always have.

Gilda: What was that?

Twilight: I'm so sorry. Let me raise the volume a bit for you. *bursts even further into gray flames* HOW...DARE...YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!!! *Twilight's fur and hair turn totally gray, as she rises to her hind legs, her left foreleg becoming a jet black robotic arm with five clawed fingers, her right foreleg becoming a cylindrical jet black arm cannon with two pincher claws extended from it* DEATH...SLINGER...CANNON...FIRE!!! *shots a ball of gray fire from the cannon arm at Gilda's head*

Gilda: WHOA! *leans backward, dodging the shot, causing it to sail into the distance and explode on the side of a mountain*

Dark Twilight: *pants, exhausted, staring at Gilda in shock* were just pretending...after all that's put yourself in danger to help me, Gilda. I-

Gilda:''s fine. I guess I learned more from Dash than I thought.

Dark Twilight: *stares at her arms and her fur* I guess...I did enough research on negative energy to retain some sort of self control while I'm like this. Didn't expect to mutate to this degree, though...I'm...I'm not looking so good...I don't...I don't feel so good, either.

Gilda: Don't worry...this is what you need to be right now. We'll get through this.

Dark Twilight: All...all right.

*Esco's Room. Esco is sprawled across the floor, exactly the same way Ridley left him the night before. Suddenly, he awakens.*

Esco: . . . What happened? Argh, that's right. Ridley.

*Esco climbs weakly to his feet, before collapsing onto his bed*

Esco: Damn him. I should've known better than to trust him. The next time I see him, nothing will be able to get in the way of my vengeful spirit.

*Esco rolls out of bed and prepares for another day at the Stadium*

Esco: Psh, look at me. Pretending that nothing ever happened. No matter how much I want it, I will never be able to go back to the life I once had, yet my soul persists that there is some way to get everything back. How pathetic of me.

*Esco heads to his mirror*

Esco: Well, one thing's for sure. I don't feel any different than I did yesterday, even after that brush with my inner demon. Wait a second... I don't feel anything at all!

*Esco quickly take his shirt off and examines his back in the mirror*

Esco: My God. The black seal has receeded!

*Sure enough, Esco's black seal has faded to the point that it is almost indistinguishable from his regular skin texture*

Esco: So he finally figured it out... *Smirks* That genius bastard. So this is what it feels like to have not a care in the world...

*A sudden knocking is heard on Esco's door*

Esco: All right, Yesman, I'll bury the damn body! At least, what's left of it, anyway.

*Esco opens the door, only to see a vaguely familiar face*

Esco: ... So it seems that even my death threat cannot keep you away. What happened to you, anyway? Ridley hooked you up with some cybernetic implants?

Dark Twilight: It's a long story... I'll try to sum it up the best I can.

Esco: Enlighten me.

Dark Twilight: *takes a few minutes to give Esco a recap of the events that unfolded since he sealed himself off after killing Metal* And that brings us to where we are now.

Esco: So that's everything then. The entire Stadium is gone now.

Dark Twilight: Unfortunately, yes. I need your help to defeat the threat that caused this!

Esco: ... I refuse.

Dark Twilight: What?! You've been a part of the Stadium for how long? Ten years? Yet you don't even care that it's all gone?!

Esco: . . .

Dark Twilight: Don't get silent on me!

Esco: *Flashes a death glare at her* I stand by my decision.

*She is startled by his sudden hostility*

Dark Twilight: Yeah? Well you're still acting pathetic! What's in the past is in the past, so you just have to learn to get over yourself!

Esco: I'm acting pathetic? Allow me to tell you what I think about you right now.

*Esco silently edges over to her*

Esco: First of all, you encountered this "Seraphis" guy in the Stadium, and failed to detect that something was seriously wrong with him. Then, without questioning his identity at all, you accepted the highly dangerous mission he presented to you. Then, after all of this, it turns out that this man was just using you to fulfill his own cause, and repayed you by killing off one of your own allies? And then, after these problems you caused on your own, you come to me, expecting that I will just blindly follow you and fix everything, only to call me pathetic after I refuse? You are AAAAing pathetic, you know that?

Dark Twilight: *She tries to get a word in edgewise, but is denied when Esco speaks up again, this time with an increased intensity in his voice*

Esco: Hey, you know what? Your dead reptilian pet returned home before all of this happened, right? Where do you think Seraphis got him from, hmm? Also, those nano-parasites, what do you think he's done with those?! That's right, because of your idiotic naivette, you have just damned your entire AAAAing race of light beings to an eternal torment in the depths of the Hell this Seraphis created!! Yet here you are, trying to point out my flaws. At least I am aware of my imperfection, while you prance around with nary a care in the world, completely oblivious to everything that doesn't center around you! Well guess what, you little airheaded AAAA? I'M NOT HAVING ANY OF IT.

Dark Twilight: *Speechless*

Esco: I'm done talking. Get out.

Dark Twilight: *Leaves, completely broken by the awful truth*

*Meanwhile, back on the surface*

Gilda: I hope no random bastards show up to pick a fight right no-

*Ridley bursts out of a nearby pile of rubble, covered in a huge mass of wires and electronic contraptions*

Gilda: ...Aww for the love of Kurt Cobain. *facepalms*

Ridley: The wonders of modern technology never cease to amaze me. *discards the random pieces of machinery attached to him and stares into Gilda's eyes* I'm surprised you're still alive, Light Warrior.

Gilda: *glares back into his eyes* I could say the same about you.

Ridley: Hmm. You can understand me after all?

Gilda: Light Warrior or not, I ain't exactly an angel.

Ridley: *takes a fighting stance*This conversation has lasted far too long already.

Gilda: Well...we're in agreement there. *takes a fighting stance as well*

Ridley: *charges at Gilda and slashes at both clawed hands*

Gilda: *blocks and tries to bite at Ridley's face*

Ridley: *leaps backward, dodging her strike, and swipes his tail at her*

Gilda: *flies in the air, avoiding the attack* CAT'S EYE! *fires a beam made of serveral rings at Ridley*

Ridley: *counters her shot with a giant fireball, causing a massive explosion that knocks Gilda to the ground, but also flings him backwards* Ugh...It appears we are at an impasse.

Gilda: Yer really a master of statin' the obvious, ya know that?

Ridley: We have little time for insults, girl. Your interference with my plans has set us all back! Even now, our common foe, with my TRUE target obeying his every command, plots our destruction.

Gilda: *rolls her eyes* Cool story, bro.

Ridley: I am not explaining this for your benefit! I am merely informing you of your error before I disembowl you!!!

Gilda: *stares in rage for a moment, and sighs* Dude...Ridley, look. I dunno how, but I can tell yer not lyin'. And, well...I've learned the hard way how much of pain it is bein' on yer own. You can't do this by yourself. Let me help.

Ridley: Treacherous mutant! You merely seek to delay your own death!

Gilda: From where I'm standin', I've been dead for a long time. *suddenly hugs Ridley*

Ridley: What little...uuugh. *tosses Gilda off of him* Fine. So, you are loyal...disgusting, but loyal. Consider this the beginning alliance.

Gilda: *smirks* Radical.

*Esco's Room. Esco sits at the foot of his bed, looking at a framed picture of his fallen companion*

???: Esco, we did it! He's finally dead.

???2: Perfect. Now we can return to Kazan and-

???: GAAAH!!

???3: Actually, not quite. Heh heh heh...

???2: Xaless?! Xaless!!

Esco: In my sense of pride, I failed to follow the assassin's number one rule: if the target is dead, make sure it is really dead. If only I wasn't such a fool, she would still be here today.

*Esco sighs angrily to himself*

Esco: I have to learn to let her go, but after ten years of hate... ten years of suffering... I have to calm down. I don't want the darkness to return.

*Esco start muttering the words of a song, as if it's being sung to him by someone*

Esco: There's a story in your eyes... I can see the hurt behind your smile. For every sign I recognize, another one escapes me...

Voice outside: Let me know what plagues your mind... Let me be the one who knows you best. Be the one to hold you up, when you feel like you're sinking...

Esco: ...!

Xaless: Tell me once again, what's beneath the pain you're feeling...

Xaless: Don't abandon me, or think you can't be saved...

*The door opens up and Twilight Sparkle walks in*

Dark Twilight: I walk beside you, wherever you are. Whatever it takes, no matter how far!

Through all that may come, and all that may go... I walk beside you, I walk beside you.

Esco: Th-That's the one I remember Xaless by! Where... did you learn that song?

Dark Twilight: Kevin copied your music library and distributed it around the Stadium.

Esco: Of course. Have you seen him at all since the attack?

Dark Twilight: No.

Esco: ... Damn. It would be a shame to lose someone so young.

*Esco slowly looks over towards her sorrowfully*

Esco: I have to apologise for my actions earlier.

Dark Twilight: No, I should be the one apologising. I... it's just... everything that's happened-

Esco: I get it. We've both lost someone we cared about. Now you know what it's like to feel true hatred.

Dark Twilight: Now, we've become that much closer...

*She leans in, only for Esco to quickly jump backwards and scramble to the other side of the room*

Esco: It's not like that! ... Just the thought of doing that is AAAAing weird.

*She looks away, shameful and emberassed*

Esco: But, from the sound of it, I hate this Seraphis guy as much as you do. I'll join you on your quest for vengeance.

Dark Twilight: Oh thank you! *Jumps onto Esco and begins hugging him*

Esco: Ack! I said it's not like that! ... Actually, this feels kinda nice...

*The two get up and head out, together*

Esco: *In the distance* You better not tell anyone about this...

Dark Twilight: I promise, Esco.

*Somewhere in a dark unknown area*

Orion: *Sitting in a meditative way thinking aloud* I don't understand. We wanted the stadium... That's what all this was about...


Seraphis: I couldn't care less about the Stadium. I just wanted to destroy all opposition, so that I may revive the Leukos and rule over the entirety of Revanda. I am the warrior this world needs, so I will be the one to lead it into a greater future! Let us go to the main city!

Orion: Is that what he wanted after all of this? Power? If so how long has he been planning this?


*Years Earlier. Orion is sitting cold and alone in a crater next to a pile of trashed metal*

Seraphis: *Aproaches the crater* Hello?

Orion: !!! *Jumps up and spawns dark energy swords*

Seraphis: A shadow being. Interesting... I could really use one of you.

Orion: *Fixes himself in a fighting stance*

Seraphis: *Points to himself* Seraphis.

Orion: *Doesn't move*

Seraphis: *Extends his hand* I'm here to help you.

Orion: *Slowly relaxes as his energy swords fade. He reaches for Seraphis' hand*

Orion: "I'm here to help you"... Did he save or use me?

*Orion suddenly begins glowing with dark energy*

Orion: He said... "A shadow being. Interesting... I could really use one of you." ... "I could use..."

Orion: *Stands up* I... I won't be used. I refuse. I will correct my actions. I'll end this myself. *Begins running* But I'll make a stop first... for a friend.

*Esco and Twilight walk out of the Stadium*

Esco: Damn, you really weren't kidding. This place is wrecked.

Dark Twilight: *calls out to Gilda, who she sees in the distance* Gilda, Esco has generously offered his help. How are things with you?

Gilda: *swoops ahead and lands in front of Esco and Twilight* I managed to snag us some backup as well.

Esco: Backup? Who could you have possibly-

Ridley: *lands beside the group* I see you're finally awake, ninja.

Esco: Ridley! *Clenches his fists* Wait a minute... What do you mean "finally awake"? You were expecting me to live?

Gilda: *Waves a hand in the air apologetically as she looks at Esco* Whoah, whoah, dude, it's fine, he's on the level.

Ridley: Of course, ninja. After your display earlier, I couldn't allow your darkness to get in the way of the mission. So, I got rid of it.

Esco: Wait, so without my curse, how am I still able to understand you?

Ridley: You fool, your curse has no correlation to your telepathic abilities!

Esco: All right. Still, that was a dick move, Ridley. I will not forget about it in the near future.

Gilda: I know you're not gonna like this, ninja guy, but I think dragon boy's gonna have to lead the way. He knows more about these jerks than us.

Esco: *Long, belaboured sigh*

Ridley: Finally, my talents are... somewhat appreciated. Do try to keep up, all of you. *Starts flying off towards the desert*

*A small makeshift chamber. The walls are lined with all types of complex machinery, and a woman stands in the center of the room working away on her metallic suit. Suddenly, Orion enters.*

Warhorse: Orion?

Orion: Hello Danielle.

Warhorse: What are you doing here? We have to stay in our respective chambers until further action-

Orion: I'm going to... I'm leaving. I suggest you do the same. Do not remain his ally. He will only deceive you.

Warhorse: *Is physically shaken* Wh-who are you talking about?

Orion: Don't play coy Danielle. You know who. I know it will be hard for you, but I advise you leave as soon as you can.

Warhorse: I... I can't. He's been there for me ever since... ever since...

Orion: Please heed my warning. Go live your life. Do not waste any more of it serving him. I'm leaving. I no longer want to be a part of this.

Warhorse: But Orion, you can't!

Orion: Take consolation in knowing that you are my truest ally. *Turns away* Good bye friend. *Begins running away*

Warhorse: *Begins speaking aloud to herself after he is gone* Is he...Is he right? Could Polemikós be playing me for a fool? Not yet. The Number One may betray me in the future, but...he has not done so yet. I owe him much...after what...happened to Mother.

Warhorse: Let the winds decide my fate. If I win this war for Polemikós, my debt will have been paid, and I shall follow you, Orion my friend. If I do not survive...I will at least take solace in the fact that I died as I lived.

Warhorse: I do not know my future, but it is one I will accept, for good or ill.

*Another small makeshift chamber. Seraphis sits in the center of this chamber, thinking to himself*

Seraphis: This temporary shelter should be suitable for now. I chose this location, not just to prevent anyone from following our trail, but to be as close as possible to the main population of Leukos warriors in Smashtopia. I should not have any problems reviving their passion; not after what happened so long ago...

*A flashback begins as Seraphis narrates*

Seraphis: Several hundred years ago, The Leukos was a race of great majesty and splendor. We had power far beyond the comprehension of mere mortals, and a peace so pleasent, it would give one the sense that they had finally arrived at their perfect heaven.

Seraphis: This was our home. The White Lands.

*A mist clears, revealing a large number of magnificent structures, closely resembling Roman and Greek architecture; perched on cliffs so high that the buildings appeared to float right on top of the clouds*

Seraphis: For thousands of years, our empire thrived, and all was in perfect order and harmony... Until they appeared.

*The sky cracks open and three great dragons appear, followed by thousands of lesser dragons*

Seraphis: Without warning, many beasts and demons from another world appeared, catching us off-guard. Many of us were slain in the battle. By the time night fell, the Main City, serving as the hub between the many Provinces of Leukos, had fallen.

*Where the great Main City once stood is now a pile of rubble. Red splatters and pools add some color to what is otherwise a scene of eternal white*

Seraphis: Those who survived fled the city into exile, forming small camps of refugees. Those of us who were left plotted the destruction of these invaders, though we were unable to complete our revenge and restore the Leukos back to its former glory.

*Flashback ends*

Seraphis: But do not worry, my brothers and sisters... Everything is finally falling into place. The White Lands are conquered, the Stadium is destroyed... Tonight, we shall begin the next phase. Let the restoration begin.

*Back out in the field of the Stadium, Yesman is finally coming to after being KOd by Orion and Warhorse*

Yesman: *Slowly opens his eyes* Oh... my... God... My head. *After cracking his neck, he begins to look around him*

*The scene around him is one of a devastated stadium, a few dead alloys, and junk scattered here and there.*

Yesman: How long... Was I out? Is it over... Or are they still here?! Crap! *Plays dead*

*Nothing happens.*

Yesman: *Stands up* Well... I should probably be getting out of here.

Miniature Yesman Angel:: *Appears on his right shoulder* Hey! What about the other Super Powers? What about the Stadium?

Yesman: Well I...

Miniature Yesman Demon: *Appears on his left shoulder* Just leave them! They've never done anything but disrespect you!

Yesman: Well... Good point *Turns away from the Stadium*

Miniature Yesman Angel:: But they were your only friends! What about Twi? Light Bear? Digi? Metal?

Yesman: Metal is dead...

Miniature Yesman Angel:: So? Do it for him!

Yesman: You're right! *Turns toward the Stadium*

Miniature Yesman Demon: *To Angel* Dude, shut the hell up! Listen, Yesman, if you stay here you'll die! And at what cost? Some lousy friends who have never treated you right, and your paycheck that you gambled away?

Miniature Yesman Angel:: *To Demon* Bro, I will kick your AAA--

Yesman: No, the Angel me is right! I need to go in there and help stop the evil doers myself! For my friends!

Miniature Yesman Demon: How AAAAing sweet of you. *Disappears*

Angel: You've done the right thing, and for that you can be my friend. *Disappears*

Yesman: Well... I guess I'm going in alone. *Begins walking toward the Stadium*

*Night falls. Seraphis rises from his chamber, and heads off to the city*

Seraphis: It's finally time. I will not need my accomplices for this, so they should be well-rested when I prepare for our conquest.

*Seraphis walks down several blocks, before ducking into a narrow side street. This street is barely wider than a typical alley, and the buildings lining it are untamed, as if they've been abandoned for years. Suddenly, Seraphis stops.*


*Commotion echoes down the street, as a few hundred men and women pour out of the buildings, assembling in front of Seraphis. They all bow before him and rise back onto their feet in unison, creating a ripple of light traveling down the crowd. One of the men, who looks barely older than Seraphis, breaks from the others and approaches Seraphis.*

Leukos Man: Seraphis Polemikós!

Seraphis: Ah, Ophanis Stratos. I see you are keeping your people in line.

Ophanis: Indeed I am, Seraphis. So, what brings you here?

Seraphis: I come bearing good news. The White Lands have been dismantled. With our main threat gone, we can rule over all of Revanda! What do you say, Ophanis?

Ophanis: *Hesitant* Err... sorry, my Seraphis, but my people no longer have the desire for conquest. We will have to decline your offer.

Seraphis: *In disbelief* ... What?

Ophanis: You are living in a time that has long since passed, I'm afraid. After many years of conflict, my people have decided to permanently reside in Smashtopia. We have lived in our own peaceful existance here for a long time, away from all the beasts, dragons, and other demons that populate this world. We have no desire to begin conflicts anew.

Seraphis: I don't believe this... Ever since our fall from grace, we have been formulating our revenge on the invaders! And now... now that we can finally go back to our old home and refresh our empire, you suddenly want us to remain a disgraced people!? Have you forgotten the feelings created from the music of our old lands? The iron mountains rising to infinity off in the distance? The lush forests, and their generous provisions of the sweetest fruits? The heavenly cliffs that oversee the entirety of the Leukos Empire?

Ophanis: No hard feelings, my friend. I'm sure that there are other Leukos that are open to your ideas, but we have since moved on.

Seraphis: Forget about the others! You and I have been together since the beginning, and I have no intentions of abandoning my greatest ally! There has to be something I can do to convince you to join me!

Ophanis: Well, it has been a long time since I've had the Spirit of Conquest; the fire that burns within all true warriors of Leukos. Perhaps if you host one of your famous gladiatorial battles in that Stadium of yours, that passion will return to me.

Seraphis: Very well! I shall have one more battle; a most glorious showdown to signal the return of our strength! I will see you again, Ophanis!

Ophanis: Same to you, Seraphis! Farewell!

*Seraphis leaves, and all the people of Leukos return to their quarters*

Seraphis: God... dammit. It seems that I will have to take over the Stadium after all.

*Seraphis rushes towards the Stadium*

*Back in Smashtopia, Orion searches for Seraphis, without success.*

Orion: I've been at this same corner four times now. If only I had a map...

Leukos Man: Hello stranger. Do you need something?

Orion: *Thinking to himself* This man; he bears striking resemblance to Seraphis! Take away his face, and the rest of his body looks just like him!

Leukos Man: Hello?

Orion: Do you happen to know a man by the name of Seraphis?

Leukos Man: Yes, I do. Come with me; I'll take you to the others. If you're lucky, you may just find him there.

Orion: Oh, thank you.


Orion: So he WAS here?

Ophanis: Ah yes. I saw the most recent Seraphis very recently. Actually within the past hour.

Orion: Wait, there is more than one Seraphis?

Ophanis: Well, no. Not in the present. But there have been countless others in the past!

Orion: Seraphis... It's a title then?

Ophanis: Correct!

Orion: Interesting... I'm getting off topic though. Would you direct me toward your Seraphis?

Ophanis: Ah yes. He is going back to his Stadium to start another melee.

Orion: !! I see. Thank you. *Begins running toward the stadium*

Orion: *To himself* He's going back to the Stadium? But he doesn't want the Stadium... which means he needs it.

*Seraphis finally reaches the Stadium Ruins... again.*

Seraphis: I have arrived! Let's get on with it, shall we?

*Seraphis casually walks into Metal's former office, finding it mostly unguarded... except for Mewtwo?*

Seraphis: Ah, it seems there is still some life in this Stadium! I thought I obliterated all of you in my attack?

Mewtwo: No. Not at all. I avoided your whole invasion on purpose.

Seraphis: You seem to be wearing the badge of head SP. How strange. Why don't you try to resist me in the least?

Mewtwo: I've seen it all before. You're just the most recent in a line of invaders.

Seraphis: Invaders? How amusing. This was originally my Stadium, you know. Therefore, you are the invaders.

Mewtwo: No, no... Metal's Stadiums.

Seraphis: And I should care about that dead imbecile why?

Mewtwo: Anyone who invades Stadiums he runs... dies.

Seraphis: Ha ha ha ha ha! Well, he never legitimately owned this Stadium, so why should I care?

Mewtwo: *Blank, shell-shocked stare* It wasn't just those people. Everyone else also died...

Seraphis: Yet here you are, standing in the charred remains of one of those Stadiums. If all you say is true, then you have just placed yourself in harm's way by coming here. Why would you do such a thing? Did this idiot destroy your brain?

Mewtwo: I've come to... like the chaos... it was just too boring on Nintendus.

Seraphis: Well good for you, imperfect freak. I have to use this computer here, and if you get in my way I won't hesitate to destroy you like the rest.

Mewtwo: *Looks shocked* No, no! I'm not going to interfere. I only make things worse when I do!

Seraphis: Not very surprising. You haven't made this any 'better' either.

Mewtwo: The first time, I infected everyone with the Slytock...

Seraphis: *Types into the computer impatiently*

Mewtwo: Then I was turned into a Maverick cyborg and cloned...

Seraphis: *The Head SP computer beeps, he continues typing*

Mewtwo: Then Kuja destroyed my ability to block intruders for the longest time...

Seraphis: *Computer beeps more, Seraphis angrily types into it*

Mewtwo: Then... Metal Man blew up the entire universe!

Seraphis: Damn! There's something wrong with this computer!

Mewtwo: ... Then Evil Wolfman blew up the universe...

Seraphis: Evil what?

Mewtwo: Evil Wolfman. I'll have more time to explain when Metal inevitably blows us all up.

Seraphis: I have better things to do than hear a mentally damaged cat ramble about nothing. There is some sort of issue in the basement delaying my glorious plan, and it must be dealt with!

*Seraphis stomps off to the basement of the Stadium*

*Esco and Twilight walk out of the Stadium*

Esco: Damn, you really weren't kidding. This place is wrecked.

Dark Twilight: *calls out to Gilda, who she sees in the distance* Gilda, Esco has generously offered his help. How are things with you?

Gilda: *swoops ahead and lands in front of Esco and Twilight* I managed to snag us some backup as well.

Esco: Backup? Who could you have possibly-

Ridley: *lands beside the group* I see you're finally awake, ninja.

Esco: Ridley! *Clenches his fists* Wait a minute... What do you mean "finally awake"? You were expecting me to live?

Gilda: *Waves a hand in the air apologetically as she looks at Esco* Whoah, whoah, dude, it's fine, he's on the level.

Ridley: Of course, ninja. After your display earlier, I couldn't allow your darkness to get in the way of the mission. So, I got rid of it.

Esco: Wait, so without my curse, how am I still able to understand you?

Ridley: You fool, your curse has no correlation to your telepathic abilities!

Esco: All right. Still, that was a dick move, Ridley. I will not forget about it in the near future.

Gilda: I know you're not gonna like this, ninja guy, but I think dragon boy's gonna have to lead the way. He knows more about these jerks than us.

Esco: *Long, belaboured sigh*

Ridley: Finally, my talents are... somewhat appreciated. Do try to keep up, all of you. *Starts flying off towards the desert*

*Ridley's party carves their way through the desert at a fast pace. Esco sprints up to Ridley to interrogate him*

Esco: I know you're keeping vital information from me, so spill it! What the Hell are we fighting, and how do you know where you're going?! What exactly is this "mission" you mentioned earlier?

Ridley: For the last time, it's confidential!

Esco: You realize I'm going to keep this up until I drive you mad, right?

Ridley: All right! All right! It's an assassination mission.

Esco: How fitting. What else?

Ridley: The target, Dana 2.0, is wanted by the Galactic Space Pirate Federation, as a creation of the traitorous Dana Morrison. The target is accompanied by three others, though their abilities remain unknown.

Dark Twilight: They must be the ones who attacked the Stadium earlier!

Esco: Since when could she understand you?

Ridley: I don't know.

*Ridley lands in the sand for a moment to rest*

Ridley: Assuming there are no further interuptions, we should be arriving at the base within the- *gets sand kicked up in his face by a blue blur in front of him* ...hour.

Sonic: Heh, you should really watch where you're going, Ridley!


Gilda: *Lands beside Ridley, putting a hand on his shoulder and smiling sympathetically* Dude, chill. I got this. *Looks at Sonic, seriously* He's on our side now, Sonic. *Smirks and points over her shoulder back at Esco* See, Esco's even alive, though I ain't sure if he's well.

Esco: *Walks up beside Ridley and Gilda, and waves weakly at Sonic, clearly wanting to get on with the mission*

Dark Twilight: *Runs up to everyone else* Sonic?

Sonic: *Looks briefly at Twilight, his mouth opening briefly in shock at her appearence, then recovers quickly and smirks at the group* Well, looks like we're all headin' down to crash the same party. I already hooked up with Tails and the Marios, but now that you guys showed up, it's gonna be even more of a sweet throw down than I had in mind! I'm lookin' to have a ton of fun, so don't be late! *Chuckles and wags a finger in the air.*

Esco: *Facepalms* Just stop talking...

Sonic: *Zips over in front of Twilight with his arms crossed over his chest, with a serious frown on his face, but one that is strangely devoid of anger. He seems to want some sort of response from Twilight*

Dark Twilight: Sonic, *Suddenly gets what he wants, then smirks confidently and nods*

Sonic: Heh. *Smirks back, then looks back to the rest of the group* Gotta speed, keeds! *Zips off*

Gilda: *laughs* Fun guy.

Ridley: You have an interesting definition of fun...

*Mario, Luigi, and Tails rush past Ridley, not stopping to notice who he is*

Mario: *Bumps into Ridley* Beg-a my pardon!

Tails: *Accidentally lands on Ridley's head* Oops, my bad! *flies off*

Luigi: *Accidentally steps on one of Ridley's feet* Sincerest apologies!

Ridley: Sigh...on with the mission.

*The group continues to press onwards*

*Seraphis goes to the Stadium's control node. Jammed into it is... Metal Man's Smash Dex.*

Seraphis: What? What kind of maniac would route all the data through such a low-tech portable device?

Smash Dex: Metal Man must monitor all systems. You would know that if you had a brain.

Seraphis: What is this? A talking box? Is this some sort of joke?

Smash Dex: You are the joke. I have seen far better looking lamp posts before. Get out of here before I do something regrettable.

Seraphis: What can a worthless piece of circuitry do to me? You look... old and obsolete! They probably make wristwatches with more memory than you!

Smash Dex: I warned you not to insult me. Now you're going to pay.

Seraphis: Hah! This thing can't do anything against me!

*Sloan's voice crackles on Seraphis' radio* Hey! Don't threaten that thing!

Seraphis: What? How did you know I was here?

Sloan: Er... intuition!

*The invisible Sloan is watching from down the hallway, as he's placing detonation charges on the remaining structure*

Seraphis: ...I don't believe you. This small box can't do anything!

Sloan: That thing has ruined many bad guys' days, Seraphis. Don't let it ruin yours. *Click*

Seraphis: I'll show him. It'll take more than some piece of tin to destroy me. I could kill Metal Man himself if he wasn't already dead!

*Outside the Stadium*

Julian: So... Mewtwo hasn't come back yet. What the AAAA are we gonna do about Metal's corpse?

Garrick: I can't seem to locate the body with anything I have on me...we'd need some sort of trace DNA and the remains of his energy to bring him back. Without those things, it'd take--

Gibby: No! Not him! Anyone but him!

Garrick: ...oh, AAAA no, I'm not bringing that wackjob back.

Dragoshi: But we have to revive him to get our cash.

*Gibby's Smash Dex rings*

Gibby: That's odd, I thought you guys stopped using these!

Julian: AAAA, we did! Who da AAAA is callin' you, Gibbs?

Gibby: *Opens the Smash Dex*

Smash Dex: Incoming message from Metal.

Gibby: ?

Seraphis: You really think Metal Man could kill me, tin box? I could easily shread him, and convert the wreckage into an intricate abstract metal sculpture! I could vaporize his brain with a single pulse from my outstretched palm! I could run him straight through, and use my superior light powers to turn him into a bloody mist!

Garrick: Who in the blue hell is this guy? And how'd he get the oompf to off Metal?

Julian: Let's go beat the AAAA out of him until he tells us where da corpse is at.

Gibby: He killed Metal! He deserves pain!

Dragoshi: Yup.

*Back inside the Stadium*

Seraphis: You see? Nothing happened. You're a powerless hunk of metal. Now to remove you and--

*The Questers walk in, cradling their weapons, having overheard everything*

Garrick: Oh, shut the AAAA up, already. I'm tired of these damn 'villian monologues' that always seem to happen.

Seraphis: !?

Julian: You killed our leader.

Seraphis: He's leader of the Super Smash Stadium... who are you people?

Gibby: We're the Questers, and we don't like bad people who kill Metal!

Deloth: He owes us over a trillion coins, and since he's not around, we'll just collect your corpse as collateral.

Seraphis: Hahahahaha. You dare challenge ME? I could kill all of you myself!

Garrick: Annnnnd there's another constant phrase we seem to hear time and time again. Maybe there's some sort of 'AAAAAAA villian handbook' they have to go through.

Julian: I'm gonna enjoy the AAAA outta this, Garrick. Let's smash his AAAAin' mouth in.

Deloth: You're really out of your league, buddy.

Seraphis: I most certainly am not. Now, come and die!

*Seraphis powers up a light energy attack, only to be gut-punched by Julian so hard he's winded, then Garrick takes out a sci-fi pistol and shoots a magitek bullet so powerful it violently explodes into his shoulder and wounds him. Then Deloth makes a gesture and inexplicably causes one of Seraphis' feet to catch on fire, and Gibby stabs him in the gut. To top this off, Dragoshi smashes him in the face with bread so hard some of his teeth fly out. Seraphis stumbles backwards, bloodied.*

Seraphis: This... this isn't happening! You aren't human!

Julian: No AAAA, Sherlock.

Garrick: Look, either you cough up Metal, or we kick the rest of your teeth in. Kinda a no brainer, if you ask me.

Deloth: Maybe it'd be better if you didn't cough up Metal. To be honest, we kinda wanted to kill him too, and killing you would almost be more fun.

Seraphis: *Cough* Enough! I can summon your worthless leader! I only want this land, not to pick a fight with... some sort of unholy traveling demigod mercenary team.

*Orion shows up*

Seraphis: Orion! Help me revive Metal!

Orion: WHAT? But you said--

Seraphis: I want you to forget what I said. These demented beings from another dimension have enough power to kill us all and melt this planet to slag alongside it. But all we have to do is revive their leader--

Garrick: Who we will then AAAAin' re-kill, because he's a pain in the AAA--

Seraphis: And then we can be on our way!

Orion: No. This has gone on far enough. I have to stop you from ruining this land any further... you're just twisted in favor of winning at any cost, even if it stops making sense!

Gibby: Ooh, a fight! Let's get some popcorn!

Julian: I wanted his head for my mantle, but we can settle for watchin' this.

Garrick: Fine, I'll ignore the fact we could just end this NOW and let them fight solely because the rest of you are AAAAin' insane...

*The Questers watch the match*

Seraphis: Orion! I should've known you would betray me!

Orion: You used me. After all this time all you needed was my power.

Seraphis: Your power? Needed? Don't make me laugh! I didn't need anything from you at all!

Orion: Seraphis you are a liar. I... I already let you destroy more than one innocent, but I will not let you do any more. You will not take this land, or subjugate it's people.

Seraphis: My vision has become reality. You cannot stop me now!

Orion: *Begins glowing with a dark aura as he fixes into a fighting stance and spawns dark energy swords* We'll see about that.

Seraphis: It seems like just yesterday you were in that hole in the same stance... *Begins glowing in a white aura*

Orion strikes with a forward slice of his swords. Seraphis easily avoids the attack and sends a beam of light energy toward Orion, who crosses his swords in an attempt to sheild from the beam. It pushes Orion back a few yards but doesn't seem to damage him too much.

Seraphis: How about this? You stop this now and I will forget all about your treachery, and you can serve me once more.

Orion: I would rather die than be used, especially by the likes of someone as pathetic as you.

Seraphis: As you wish. Prepare to die. *Begins charging a massive ball of light energy*

Orion: *Creates a giant hand made of dark energy*

*Seraphis fires a blast of energy toward Orion, who blocks it with the hand. However the hand is not powerful enough and it is destroyed, leaving Orion wide open. Seraphis shoots a beam of light at Orion's stomach. It makes contact and leaves a glowing white wound, bleeding black blood on him.*

Orion: *Looks at his stomach and sighs* .... Enough.

Seraphis: I think you mistook what I was saying earlier; I am still the most powerful being in this land. I simply cannot defeat an entire team of deranged interdimensional mercenaries. And why should I? Their price will do nothing to ruin my plan. This land will soon be mine.

Orion: You.... I may not be able to stop you from taking this land, but I will not be subject to your rule ever again. May you rot in hell.

Seraphis: You dare to damn a Seraphis!? *Moves his hand in a slapping movement sending a move of light energy toward Orion. After the wave makes contact with the ground Orion is gone*

Seraphis: ... He vanished. Now, I--

Garrick: Alright, enough of this bullAAAA. Bring out Metal NOW or we end you and the Stadium. And we can do it, too. We aren't even trying right now.

Seraphis: All right, all right!

*Seraphis summons a pile of fleshy scraps, and infuses it with light energy. Nothing happens.*

Seraphis: No! This can't be! What kind of demon could destroy all life from this sort of being? I can tell, he's like you... not of this world... but I can't revive him!

Garrick: *Flips a visor over his eye and checks, whistling* Ooo, well done. I'd tip my hat to whoever finished him off, if I had a hat to tip. They should have vaporized what was left to be sure... buuuuut you're right, you're AAAAed. We'll have to kill you to recoup our losses.

Deloth: Tough luck, jack. Pay up. *Levels an illogically silenced revolver at Seraphis' face*

Seraphis: No, there has to be another wa--

*A man- no, a Mario in a white labcoat peeks in from the corner*

Dr. Mario: Did I just hear the noise of impending death? My wallet needs-a lot-a coins!

Garrick: Oh for AAAA sake, not HIM...

Gibby: Well, it won't cost US anything!

Dr. Mario: Yes! I'll-a get the engine! *Carts in a go-kart motor*

Seraphis: Are you serious?

Dr. Mario: Just give-it-a ton of your light power and Metal will be alive-a in no-time-a! And then he can give-a me his coins!

Dragoshi: ...Uh... leave us some too, or we'll have to fight you for it.

Dr. Mario: Mama Mia! I'll just have to-a steal some coins from someone else too-a!

Julian: We can hook you up with an unwittin' victim, Doc.

Seraphis: What kind of 'heroes' are you people?!

Deloth: Don't ask. They're still writing down all the different laws we broke in 'saving' the universe.

Dragoshi: You're better off just helping the good doc before somethin' wacky happens.

Seraphis: Fine, just get out of my hair after this. You don't see ME interrupting whatever horrible, unspeakable things it is you must do on a daily basis!

Garrick: Alright, alright, he's got a bit of a point. Let's get this train wreck rolling already.

*Dr. Mario plugs the Go-kart to Metal. Seraphis powers it up with his vast amounts of light energy. The whole room whites out!*

Gibby: Whoa, this is brighter than that time the universe exploded!

*Yesman is running out of the Stadium*

Yesman: *Looking back* I can't believe he fell for it! I did it! I freaking did it!

*Reaches the front door and exits through it*

Yesman: Now to find the others!

Suddenly, Orion jumps through the door, and noticing Yesman, stops in front of him.

Yesman: *Jumps* Back up buddy, cause I'm feeling on top of the world and I am not afraid to do something crazy!

Orion: ...

Yesman: Are you just gonna stand there or are you gonna do something?

Orion: ... Defeat Seraphis.

Yesman: Defeat Seraphis? Wait your you're the bad guy...

Orion: Listen to me! I will no longer take part in this. You and your friends will have to take care of him. I am sorry for our previous encounter. Be strong. *Turns around and runs off, going faster than any normal man, and leaving a streak of dark energy behind him*

Yesman: Wait!

*Orion disappears in the distance*

Yesman: Well... There is another problem taken care of. Still we have Seraphis to take care of...

*The room dims out. The image of Metal Man appears, first as a sort of hologram, then suddenly as a whole person, who then falls onto the floor, smoking and sparking with electrity.*

Metal: Whoa... whoa.... whoah! Where am I?

*Mewtwo floats into the room.*

Mewtwo: Guess.

Metal: *Sees the Questers... Mewtwo... and Dr. Mario and Seraphis in the room* ...I've been sent to Nintendus?

Garrick: Something like that. *Levels gun at Metal's face* Our money. Now.

Deloth: *Points his gun at Metal's left kneecap* Yeah, did you bury it under the lawn, or is it inside the fountain outside?

Gibby: Metal! The shelf has been burnt to a crisp, and I heard you called me 'Gobbu' while I was sleeping!

Mewtwo: You are the cause of this mess, Metal. I should choke you to death for your misdeeds. *Metal glows, held it place by psychic energy*

Julian: Yo Mets, I don't really care as much as these people. I jus' want my AAAin' money.

Dr. Mario: Don't forget-a, you owe me all your-a coins! Er, after the others-a have taken half of them, that-a is!

Seraphis: I'll leave you with your 'friends', wannabe Head SP. Here, take your trinket back. I have a Stadium to conquer.

*Seraphis rips the dex out of the wiring and throws it at Metal's feet, then walks off.*

*A beaten up Pat and Digi walk into the room, then gasp.*

Pat: He's ALIVE?

Digi: What.

Julian: 'Course he's AAAAin' alive. What did you think we were here for, sight seeing?

Pat: You told me he couldn't possibly come back to life, Digi! Did you lie to me?

Digi: No, I didn't. You don't see Gibby walking around, do you--

Gibby: I resent that remark! I am here, and I am VERY hungry!

Digi: Oh... gosh...

Pat: DIGI! Why did you tell us he was utterly destroyed when he wasn't?

Metal: Hi Figi.

Digi: ...that's your answer. He never respected me... there have been times I hoped he wouldn't come back. I didn't want you to try.

Garrick: Oh, boo AAAAing hoo. We brought him back to so we can get our money. We're gonna off him as soon as he coughs up.

Pat: *Shakes his head* Digi, you know that's not a nice thing to do! If I was still head SP, I'd have to punish you for deceiving us!

Digi: I know, I know... I just didn't like having my brat years mocked by him every time he reached for his least he never convinced me to set my golf clubs permanently on fire.

Pat: It's not like you can use that club anymore, that freak apparently stole it from you!

Digi: Yeah, I know...I've got other weapons though.

Julian: Nice to know you're enjoyin' this little reunion here, but, we got a bunch of coins to get and a Metal AAAAer to kill.

Pat: What? No! We need him for this Stadi--

*The Questers point all their weapons at Pat's face*

Pat: ...Never mind, I don't want to re-enact that time you guys killed me for stealing Yurie's sword.

Dr. Mario: Mama Mia! I'm not-a getting my coins with those people in the way! Time-a to get those coins Yes-man promised me instead! *Runs off*

Metal: Oh thank madness he's gone. I can deal with all of you, but not him.

Garrick: Oh, shut your AAAAing mouth and give us our pay before we beat it out of your hide.

Seraphis: *Over the PA* At long last, I have taken over this miserable Stadium, and with it, the surrounding lands! The reign of madness is ending, and the era of order is upon us!

Metal: *Groans, slowly getting up, though still restrained from doing much else* Look, guys, this is a lot more complex than it looks.

Deloth: That's what you said that time you took our pay and made it into a gold plated limo!

Metal: But this time, I'm the good guy.

Garrick: Like the time you told us to abandon Snake as our leader and overthrow the hands in the Nintendus Stadium?

Dragoshi: Only to turn out to be the same crazy looper you really are?

Metal: Er, but this time is different!

Digi: ...Isn't that like the time on Alsa where you asked us to protect you from Garrick?

Garrick: Then you AAAAing drove me insane and transformed me into that AAAAAAAA Alex Fender!

Julian: And somehow, you helped encourage Digi into blowin' up my AAAAin' Stadium!

Metal: ...Fine, fine! I give up! I fooled you all far too many times!

Mewtwo: Just like that time when Evil Wolfman was attacking--


*Metal hurls the insurance plan to the Stadium at the Questers.*

Deloth: *Whistles* 10 trillion coins... how in the world did you afford it?

Metal: I spent almost my every coin on it, AND IT'S NOT GOOD UNLESS THE STADIUM IS STILL LEGALLY MINE!

Garrick: Oh for AAAA sake....

Julian: You've gotta be kiddin' me...

Gibby: That's... that's... stupid!

Metal: So, whether you like it or not... you've gotta help me take this Stadium back, or we're ALL going to be penniless!

Garrick: No. NO. I'm gonna kill you right now and take THAT as my down payment!

*Garrick levels the gun, only for Julian to violently punch it out of his hand.*

Julian: No, you aren't! We're gettin' our AAAAin' pay, and if you kill our piggy bank, then you'll have to pay for it!

Garrick: *Sighs* God... I'm going to have to let you do this, aren't I? ...Fine... (I'll just have to kill you worthless AAAAin' loons when the time is right...)

Deloth: Alright, you've got our support Metal. Who dies first?

Seraphis: *PA* All right men, prepare the Gladiatorial Arena! It is time to prepare for our main event!

Metal: Him.

Dragoshi: It's light person smashing time. *Brandishes bread.*

*The group walks up the stairs, into Seraphis' taken over Head SP office*

Seraphis: Oh, the Conquesters of Worlds have returned with their "Fearless Leader". You've come to take "your" Stadium back, have you? Well, Metal, it seems your friends have their own agenda! Attack, everyone!

Metal: Turns out the joke is on you! I took out an insurance policy on this place, and I don't get the money if you still own the place or if I die!

Seraphis: *Gears working in his brain* So that... means...

Julian: It means we beat the AAAA out of you.

Seraphis: I refuse to allow this! I have retaken my Stadium, thus I cannot be defeated!

Metal: No, that means that all the bad things happen to you, while we get to steal that upper hand you used to have since we're now the 'bad' guys!

Seraphis: *Pulls out a book labeled SSS Plot Cliches and thumbs through it for a bit* ... Oh AAAA, he's right.

*Metal takes out his TT33 and blasts Seraphis in the face with it. As Seraphis stumbles back, Garrick also shoots him several times with a glowing blue gun. Deloth adds in some magnum fire, and Digi shoots an elemental-will changed ice ray at Seraphis. Seraphis is smashed into the wall, as Julian picks up a chair and smashes it through Seraphis' face, and Gibby stabs Seraphis in the shin as Dragoshi winds him with a jab into the gut via bread, before changing out to a weird orange machinegun with 'Vendetta' on the side and shooting Seraphis. Pat also throws a kamehameha at Seraphis, and Mewtwo attacks Seraphis' mind with his psychic powers.*

*Seraphis looks like he's been run over by a semi. Twice. While on fire.*

Seraphis: You... THINGS... cannot kill me... no matter HOW MUCH IRRATIONAL POWER you may have!

*Seraphis takes out a small vial of white liquid, absorbing its contents while he struggles to his feet*

Julian: All that means izzat we hit you for several more rounds until you die!

Metal: *Menacingly takes out a volleyball pole with a disco ball attached to it*

Mewtwo: You interrupted our story. Now you die!

Seraphis: You cannot do this! *Begins glowing* Go... GO AWAY!!

*Seraphis makes an astonishingly powerful light blast. The entire screen turns white. Only Digi and Pat and Garrick manage to survive; the rest are all disintegrated, as the entire office is turned to a burning wreck.*

Seraphis: There we go. If you dare challenge a deity like me, you die! I have no time for this nonsense. My lands need me!

Digi: Aw shoot, we're in trouble now.

Garrick: If only it was that easy.

Seraphis: What? What could possibly happen to stop me now?

*The 'dead' people arrive back on SSB style revival platforms... and they look ticked off.*

Seraphis: . . . AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

*Seraphis runs away as they chase him, shooting up and exploding everything in their path.*

*Sloan appears behind Seraphis.*

Sloan: You dummy! You don't kill Questers that way! Especially not Metal! Metal is only weak against enough dark energy to cause the entire planet to explode, and even then, only when it is tempered with hatred deadly enough to kill anything. Did you learn nothing from seeing that video I showed you of Garrick killing Metal Man?

Seraphis: You dare insult me? I should--

*Seraphis runs into a dead end, and there's no way out. Sloan shakes his head and waggles his finger in an "I told you so" stance.*

Metal: Game over, annoying dude I don't know the name of! This is your kill screen! I'm going to disco dance on your corpse!

Garrick: Shut up, Metal.

Metal: Er... yes, sir Garrick! Please don't re-kill me!


Metal: EEeeee... yes. *Goes silent*

*Seraphis looks about, desperately, then is confused by Sloan blithely walking right in the way of the Questers as they catch up.*

Seraphis: Are you mad?! They--

Sloan: Just... just let me handle this.

*The Questers stop dead in their tracks, seeing Sloan*

Garrick: And it just gets worse and worse...

Metal: Who put the glowing cactus in our path?

Digi: Oh no! It's him! He's going to trick us again!

Julian: I'm going to kill you, Sloan. No one steals my motherAAAAAAA washing machine!

Sloan: Stealing your washing machine was fun. Undermining your Stadium, conquering Alsa's Mushroom Kingdom and then making my own dimension was even better.

Dragoshi: Beating you up with my bread is even better! *Swings at Sloan*

*The bread hits a strange TV Static field, then vanishes. Sloan is unharmed.*

Dragoshi: !?

Sloan: I built my own X-zone while I was gone. Your bread is there now. And soon, you will join it.

Garrick: What? An X-Zone field?

Sloan: Why are you working with these people, Garrick? I thought we had a deal.

Garrick: Hm... you're right. But I'm kinda locked into a bit of a thing here...

Sloan: I can get you the money. I have my own dimension. It's not like I can't sell some resources and move some illegal services to do it...

Garrick: ...yeah. You're right. *Points gun at Metal* I don't AAAAing trust you, but it's a damn sight better than working for HIM.

Metal: *Puts his hands up* Ack! No! I... will pay you triple what he does!

Garrick: I'm not your AAAAing Quester to boss around, you'll die when I feel like killing you, you sack of--

*Julian pushes the gun away.*

Julian: No, no, NO. You are NOT AAAAin' workin' with HIM.

Garrick: You left the group before you could know any more about him. He's not THAT bad...tacky fashion sense, but he's better than Borne, at least.

Julian: BORNE? Of course he's AAAAin' better than BORNE. But I'm not gettin' paid by that AAAAAAAA crazy. He'll probably jus' give us the payment in wooden nickels or somethin'!

Garrick: If you want to fight him, go ahead. You'll just lose like you did against Sergeant Levis.

Julian: ...AAAA.

Sloan: Well, Julian? Care to walk up to me unarmed and demand I stop? I even have a better weapon than Levis--I think the Aribar look would be good on you...

*Sloan lights up a freakish rainbow strobe-light lightsaber*

Julian: I don't AAAAin' care what historical bullAAAA you reference! Your kneecaps are gonna be smashed into your face for this AAAA!

*Seraphis looks to Sloan, nodding in approval.*

Seraphis: Hold them off, Sloan. I will deal with the SPs, as you said. I'm beginning to see that I underestimated you... you are far more valuable than I knew.

Sloan: Good, because you aren't going to be fighting the SPs yet.

Seraphis: WHAT?!

Sloan: Last time I checked, fighting with a chair impaled in your skull and several exit wounds the size of Chicago wasn't a good idea.

Seraphis: *Takes out his vial, realizing it's empty* You speak correctly. I owe you my life for this, but I shall not return the favor, because of your prior insults. I shall leave... but I will return. When that happens, these worthless SPs will die, and the land shall be mine!

Metal: Hah, SPs! My Questers will kill you all, and then I will take over this world!

Sloan: You see, Julian? You're just his tool.

Julian: The AAAA I am! I'm only doing this to get the AAAAin' money, then I'm done. You can't trick me, Sloan!

Gibby: Yeah! We're the Questers!

Deloth: We don't know how to quit! We've died too many times to care!

Dragoshi: I'm going to get my bread back... the hard way. *Cracks knuckles*

*Sloan wields his lightsaber in a weird upside-down stance*

Sloan: You never learn, do you.

*Deloth shoots a bullet at Sloan; it is eaten by the field. Julian tries to punch Sloan, but realizes he can't due to the field. Gibby chucks a fireball, which is also eaten by the field. Sloan then slashes Julian across the face, and swats Gibby's sword slash away as well. Metal however, walks right up to Sloan.*

Metal: Nice little trick you have there. Mind if I play with it?

Sloan: *Nervously* Er... aren't you going to rely on them for everything?

Metal: They're great, but Garrick's not on my side anymore. To be honest I never expected him to be. He just wants me dead! So I have to do EVERYTHING by myself... well, everything like THIS!

*Metal stabs his hand into the field. Time energy overwhelms it, burning it out and shocking Sloan.*

Sloan: Bah! This is a small setback! *Turns on his backup field*

Metal: *Stabs THAT field with his arm, also overwhelming it*

Sloan: What are you, some kind of--

Metal: Tool of Destiny? Yes. Now more than ever, since apparently I can't even die without fate reviving me... against my wi--er, all according to plan!

Sloan: Bravo, Metal. You just forgot one thing.

Metal: Nonsense! I forget everything!

Sloan: You can beat me, all right. But then why do you need Questers?

Gibby: Yeah! You get them Metal! We'll cheer you on by the sidelines!

Julian: I think I agree with the Gibbs there. Why should I AAAAin' risk my life again when you seem to be doing jus' fine on your own?

Metal: ...No! No! You are my Questers! Kill! Kill Sloan! I command you, with the power of burnt shoes! I destroyed the field!

Deloth: Give it a rest, Metal. We don't serve you. We just serve our need for money after you stole several trillion coins from us. You can deal with these wackos with your SPs and your own two hands.

Dragoshi: I have to go find my bread, anyway.

Sloan: See, Seraphis? No more Quester problem. Solved by yours truly.

Metal: ...I have a gold deposit I stole I can give you guys right now if you kill Sloan! *Shows image of it on the dex*

*The Questers' eyes light up and they aim their guns at Sloan. Except for Garrick, who rolls his eyes in disgust and walks off.*

Sloan: ...Dammit. I hate your cheap time travel.

Metal: Hah! I beat you, Sloan!

Sloan: Oh poor old me. Having to use plan C... plan C-4.

Metal: Plan Sea Force?

Sloan: No. Plan C--

Julian: ...FU--


*Seraphis and Sloan warp out, as the Stadium violently explodes, damaging the Questers heavily.*

Julian: *Slowly getting up from the rubble* Man... AAAA this. You handle this, Metal. Or we kill you. No amount of money is worth that hassle.

Metal: What? *Pries a support beam out of his shoulder* But it's only Sloan, a super powered light being I don't know the name to, and his all star team of allies!

Deloth: *Dryly* Yes, the only person more insane than we are and a bunch of other supervillains. No, you and your worthless lackeys will be doing this.

Metal: Fine... Digi, Pat! We're taking down Seraphis!

Digi: Uh, okay... boss...

Pat: *Stands up* Why... why did I choose to serve this person... I even knew what he did before...

Deloth: It's okay, Pat. Eventually the constant cycle of death and explosions destroys your ability to care. Just that we've died so much that we've begun caring again. Don't think too hard about it or your brain might strangle itself.

Pat: ...*Falls over*

Digi: *Reaches for his golf club and finds it missing* Uh...

Metal: An excellent start. Let's go!

Mewtwo: ... *Shakes his head, and leaves, alongside the other Questers*

*Meanwhile, Dr. Mario is walking back to his room*

Dr. Mario: *singing* I got a-paid today, I-a got paid today, and I'm-a gonna dance! *Opens his door and looks in*

Dr. Mario: Mama-mia!

*His room looks normal*

Dr. Mario: That little runt-a promised me-a ALL of the Stadium's coins-a if-a I-a resurrected Metal Man! I'm-a gonna have to get my pay-a, one way or another-a! *Takes out a chainsaw and revs it up* Otherwise, that little runt... is-a about to get-a some elective surgery-a!