*Bruce Banner walks out to a podium on stage in front of a massive crowd, adjusts his glasses, and waves to the throngs of AAA fans.*
Bruce Banner: Hello, and welcome all! We've finally reached the end of the AAA season, and what a season it's been! But of course, I'm just stating the obvious.
*The crowd laughs riotously*
Bruce Banner: So for you thousands in attendance, and the millions watching world wide, here are this year's tournament winners! In first place, triumphing over all in her way, BAYONETTA!
*A tall, lanky woman in a black body suit cartwheels on stage to loud applause and smirks with a small wave at the audience as she elegantly strolls the podium.*
Bayonetta: It's of no surprise to me, darlings, I had this cat in the bag from the beginning!
Bruce Banner: Than you certainly deserve this, ma'am! *He hands her a gold trophy.*
Bayonetta: Why thank you Brucie-dear! Maybe sometime you could introduce me to that "other guy!" *She takes her prize, winks, and disappears in a cloud of smoke and bats.*
Bruce Banner: *sweats and adjusts his tie* Well, uh, with that settled, let's meet our runners up! In second place, expert swordsman CLOUD STRIFE!
*A man with spiky blond hair and a black shirts and pants walks out, twirling his huge buster sword before sheathing it as the crowd starts clapping again.*
Bruce Banner: So Cloud, how do you feel?
Cloud: Not how I'd hoped it'd go, but I'm pretty satisfied, all the same. I relied too much on basic techs and not enough my Limit Breaks. I won't make that mistake next time.
Bruce Banner: Godspeed. *gives Cloud a thumbs up and hands him a silver trophy*
Cloud: *takes the trophy, gives Bruce a thumbs up, and walks off stage*
Bruce Banner: And lastly, in third, Rock Light, better known to you and I as Megaman!
*Rock teleports in and smiles and waves to the cheering crowd.*
Bruce Banner: So, third, huh? Not too bad, kiddo.
Megaman: Heh, well, uh, like Cloud was saying, I should probably stick to what I'm best out. I tried a straight up fist fight way too often when I could have been shooting from a distance. So, I'll keep my strengths in mind, and maybe bring a few more bombs and blasters next time!
Bruce Banner: I can't argue with that. *Shakes Rock's hand and gives him a bronze trophy*
Megaman: *Salutes Bruce and the fans before beaming out*
Bruce Banner: That's it for the tourney awards but we've got plenty more prizes to give out based on feats from across the season! Stay tuned, but first, a word from out sponsors!
Mash: Ah, peace and quiet. Nothing but peace and quiet for weeks on end. I may be poor but I'm hap-
: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Mash: -py. what is it?
: Mash it's terrible! Jason Vorhees has once again risen from the dead to punish the living!
Mash: I highly doubt that.
: No really, look! *She points down the hallway as a short creature in a black robe and white mask walks down, moaning.*
???: Urgh, urgh, I need piiiiizaaaa.
Mash: , that's Yesman, remember?
: Noooooooooooooo!!!
Mash: Well, anyways, Yesman, what are you doing back here?
Yesman: Well, I finally ran out of cash and was wondering if I could do a few errands around here and then hit up Burger Trench. Scraping cheese out of pizza boxes got old.
Mash: Right, well, I'm sure we could find something for you to-
: Say, you guys smell something?
*A smoke bomb goes off and causes everyone in the room to cough. Out of the smoke appears a tall human girl in a red ninja outfit.*
Twi: Hi guys!
: Ack! You know, Twi, you could have used the door.
Twi: Sorry, force of habit. Oh, and Yesman is here, too!
Yesman: Say Twi, you look different. Is that a new haircut!
Twi: It is, thanks Yes!
Mash: So, you need work too?
Twi: Nah, I just had a lull in the adventuresome adventures with my ninja pals and thought I'd see what you were all doing! It's so quiet around here!
Mash: *sighs* Well, it was. Anyways, I'm sure we can-
*A television monitor in the room lights up. A strange 3D animated head appears on the screen and yells at Mash mid-sentence.*
Max Headroom: STOP EVERYTHING.
Mash: What?
*Digi walks in, only to stare at the monitor.*
Digi: *Sighs* Why can't I just have a single day without something ridiculous happening!?
Mash: Who are you? What are you? Why--
Max Headroom: I--I--I have the most amazing plan to stop that tin plated dork Stark once and for all! He-he-he-he'll rue the d-d-d-day he messed with Xavier Ridgecrest! R-r-rue it like a rhu-rhu-rhu-barb pie!
Mash: Fine. Make it quick, mysterious talking head.
Max Headroom: That's M-M-M-MAX Headroom to YOU! N-n-n-now, when he l-l-l-least expects it, I'll c-c-crush him! But first, I n-n-need a d-d-d-d-distraction! Someone to w-work around h-h-his app-app-etizers!
Digi: *Sighs again* I can only guess this has something to do with Metal... and I bet he refers to the defenses of that stadium...
Max Headroom: Y-y-y-es!
Digi: Yes to what? That you're Metal, or the defenses?
Max Headroom: *Ignores Digi's question* D-D-D-Digi, you're a VR T-T-Trooper, right?
Digi: A Chosen Child, if that's what you're asking. *Shakes his head at the head's ignorance*
Max Headroom: G-G-Great! So use your super Poke-Digi-Beetleborg p-p-p-powers to hack S-S-S-Stark's system!
Digi: I... I'll see what I can do, Metal. Er, "Max Headroom". *rolls his eyes* I mean, I heard rumors someone wanted a match scheduled, but I'll be free right after that.
Max Headroom: A-A-All right, great! The r-r-r-re-rest of you, try to s-sneak in as a scapegoat, I-I-I-I mean bait, I-I-I-I mean, as-as a d-distraction! TO V-V-VIC-VICTORY! *vanishes off the screen, making whoosh noises*
: So we're going on a mission?
Mash: Regrettably, yes.
Twi: Wow, corporate espionage! This is so exciting! It's like I never left!
Yesman: I hope they have a cheap food court! *jumps on Twi's shoulders*
Mash: Well's let's get going so we'll be there when Digi's ready to hack us in.
*Bowser has rounded up the SSS roster outside one of the locker rooms*
Bowser: Heads up, brawlers! The Arena's doing their little sugar-coated show and we need to put 'em on notice! I need a few volunteers to sacrifice themselves to the King of Awesome and make us look good again!
*The fighters start clamoring for his attention.*
Bowser: Who we gonna go with? Not you, Sonic, nobody's gonna be able to keep up!
Sonic: Hey, come on! I had fun beating up Ash!
Bowser: Eyeballs, spiky.
Sonic: Geez...
Bowser: Hey, I got one! You over there! *points at Snake*
Snake: Are you sure about this?
Bowser: You've got explosions and you've got your own chopper! You're a one man action flick!
Snake: Maybe it'll be good to finally take some aggression out. You're about the size of a good punching bag anyway.
Bowser: That's the spirit, Cobra!
*Snake glares at Bowser for a moment.*
Bowser: You know what else people love? Tough chicks. I didn't raise Wendy to be a chump.
*Samus raises an eye.*
Samus: Are you implying me to be in this as well?
Bowser: Zelda and Powerpuff just had their own matches, and you think people are gonna want Toadstool in there?
Peach: Uhhh, it would be predictable.
Bowser: I think Samus is perfect!
Samus: Let's go.
Bowser: Alright. And one more! Which one of you just screams, "I can't believe they're fighting King Koopa!"? I know! That little fuzzy one with the baseball cap and the crazy tennis moves.
Diddy Kong: Heeeey! *grins*
Bowser: Perfect, we're getting something good here. Let's get out of here and get on camera!
*Bowser charges through the crowd and leads his three combatants out to the exit--but before he does he doubles back and yanks Digi by his collar.*
Bowser: And you know what to do.
Digi: Yes, King--
Bowser: What's that one match you love too much, where everyone goes flying around like a broken Clown Copter?
Digi: Sudden death?
Bowser: Good man, that's the one. We're gonna be racking up kills left and right, nobody with an attention span longer than ten seconds will keep the award show on. Make it wild, make it messy, make it fun!
Digi: You've...you've got an idea.
*Bowser lets go of him and smiles.*
Bowser: I always knew you've had something special around here. They're gonna miss you.
Digi: Pleased to...be the crazy one?
*Bowser nods and growls in approval*
Bowser: Awww yeah.
Digi: Right. Back to you in a few.
*Digi runs back to the remaining fighters, quickly rounding up Sonic and Peach as to not leave them out of the festivities, and runs with them to the booth.*
Peach: Is a sudden death match going to be enough?
Digi: I've got things... *starts fiddling with the settings*
Sonic: Twenty lives, times four guys?!
Digi: We might not need them all. Now let's take a nice arena that's still a bit cozy... *chooses Captain Olimar's Distant Planet*
Peach: Wow, that's beautiful.
Digi: And we're on our way!
*The fighters are teleport onto the arena. As usual, the weather is nice right now and the Bulborb isn't intruding for the moment.*
Digi: Already our group is searching each other out, looking for an early kill or two. Snake kicks Diddy Kong around, hoping to trip him up while Bowser stuns Samus with a couple of flames.
Peach: But Samus is back on her feet, jumping around and dropping a bomb on Bowser. He's airborne but doesn't die--
Sonic: Diddy gets blasted through the edge by one of Snake's grenades, and now the remaining three tangle up on the slope!
Digi: There's a quick double kill by Bowser, smashing the other two in opposite directions, but Diddy thwacks him with a couple of peanuts.
Bowser: Get back to me with some steaks, then we'll talk!
Diddy Kong: No way, big guy!
*Diddy grins and flips Bowser into the air, sending him off course. He taunts with some acrobatics, but gets blasted off by a Snake-propelled missile.*
Peach: Wow, Snake is handling his projectiles well. He's thrown Samus aside with an explosive and killed Diddy Kong with a missile. Oh, and here's Bowser with a bomb on his own on Samus! But she's still invincible by a whisker. Oops.
Sonic: King Koopa's on his shell for a moment but he gets back up, only to be face to face with Samus' blaster!
Digi: Hold on Sonic, Snake planted some C4 on that plant on the side, hoping someone gets to trigger it.
Peach: It's Bowser. *giggles*
Bowser: 300% D2 Snake: 306% D2 Samus: 300% D2 Diddy: 315% D2
Peach: It's still pretty even so far, but Samus does clear Diddy Kong out again with some explosions from her blaster.
Sonic: Look out now, it's raining, and the big head with the eyes leaves hungry.
Digi: That Bulborb can be a distraction to the others, but not now. Everyone else is trying not to slip off, but in the fray Bowser and Snake are dazed, both falling down and out.
Sonic: Hey, let's throw something in! *lobs a Deku Nut onto the main branch*
Peach: Hmm...this looks nice. *Peach tosses a Warp Star*
Digi: Yeah, you two got the hang of this! Diddy is thriving with the pace of this fight, and grabs the Deku Nut to hurl at Snake, but he's caught off guard by the blunt end of Samus' gun! That's another smash off of the arena!
Bowser: 309% D5 Snake: 300% D4 Samus: 300% D5 Diddy: 300% D5
Sonic: And excuse us if we're a bit behind this action, but it is fun! And there's Diddy Kong busting open one of the flower containers with more items coming out. What's he got?
Peach: It looks to be a Pitfall, he throws it and catches Snake. There's also a Ray Gun, which Bowser takes.
Digi: Here's that Bulborb again, looking for a snack as always, and gets one as Snake is tossed in after waking up from his trip.
Sonic: Yup, he was definitely too slow, and Bowser is way too trigger happy.
Peach: ...I think he's already used up his shots, but he knocked the others out.
Bowser: THIS STADIUM IS OURS! *poses with the gun*
Digi: Can everyone keep up this incredible pace? Samus looks like she can, as she gives Snake a Screw Attack and even catched Diddy Kong for a couple of nicks.
Sonic: Snake recovers from the Screw Attack by firing another Missile, and Diddy finally grabs that Warp Star before it disappears.
Peach: Oh no! He misses everyone with it. What a terrible break, but he's back up on his feet, slapping Samus with his tail.
Bowser: 310% D7 Snake: 300% D8 Samus: 311% D7 Diddy: 300% D7
*Digi glances back out at the arena, and then out the exit of the booth. He hurls a Smash Ball into the fight.*
Digi: You two keep going, you're doing great.
Sonic: What? We haven't even hit halfway yet.
Digi: Keep going. *nods to them and heads out*
Peach: Oh, I guess so. It's not a surprise they're going for the Smash Ball, but Snake lays down another charge of C4 first.
*Meanwhile, Banner has been handing out sponsorships to various fighters who have completed different challenges over the past year. He is getting to the final few recipients.*
Bruce Banner: And now, a sponsorship from Rockstar Energy Drink for the best tag team duo, DEADPOOL AND SQUIRREL GIRL!
*A man in a red and black full body suit and a woman with rodent teeth and a long bushy tail walk out, the crowed whooping and hollering*
Bruce Banner: I must say, I never expected you two to work so well together.
Squirrel Girl: I know right! We're pretty much total opposites but when we got out there we were like peanut butter and jam, like fish and chips, like pizza and wings, like beer and-
Deadpool: DOREEN.
Squirrel Girl: Eep! Sorry Wade, got carried away!
Bruce Banner: Hah, that's the first time I've ever seen you tell someone else to cool it, Wade.
Deadpool: Welp, there's a first time for everything, Jolly Green Giant.
Bruce Banner: Enjoy your new winnings, you two.
*They walk off*
Mash: Well, we're here. Let's hope Digi knows what he's doing.
: He does, trust me.
Twi: And if he doesn't, I know a lot about begging for mercy!
Yesman: Wow, so do I!
Mash: *shudders* As long as that weird talking head wasn't leading us astray...
: You're questioning a virtual talking head in a Stadium where we take orders from giant floating hands?
Mash: You have a good point there...
Sonic: Snake finally detonates the C4 with Bowser standing on it, but Samus is able to absorb the Smash Ball! Come on, girl, let's see what you've got!
Peach: Sonic, that's an odd thing for a commentator to be saying. Here's Diddy Kong distracting Samus with a couple of peanuts while Bowser returns, clearing Snake out.
Sonic: Samus might be waiting for the arena to be more stable, hoping the rain clears out too.
Peach: That's a smart decision by Samus to take her time. The weather clears out again, and the flowers start to bloom.
Sonic: Diddy busts open another container and slams down an Assist Trophy--hey, that's Jeff!
Peach: Can Samus avoid the rockets? Looks like she will, but Snake and Bowser can't.
Sonic: And those two still aren't done taking it out on each other when they come back as Snake wipes out the king one more time!
Bowser: 300% D11 Snake: 300% D9 Samus: 315% D7 Diddy: 300% D8
*Meanwhile, Digi has run back off to his office, folders opened around his desk as he's typing at his computer.*
Digi: Accessing signal... *grits his teeth* I hope Metal doesn't have any stupid flaws in his plan...
*The feed of the match now pops up on his monitor...Bowser has just killed Samus, freeing the Smash Ball from her, while Diddy has used his Rocketbarrels to send Snake flying. Both Bowser and Snake have now lost at least half of their scheduled lives.*
*Digi is now typing an address which pulls up a feed of the AAA ceremony going on. Skeletor is at a podium with a video in the background playing AAA highlights...*
Bruce Banner: *Looks to the crowd* And now for the most K.O.'s overall this year, a Burger Trench sponsorship goes to CAPTAIN MARVEL!
*Crowd goes crazy as a short haired blond woman in an elaborate bodysuit waves to them*
Captain Marvel: I still pack a punch, literally.
Bruce Banner: *Chuckles* So Carol, glad you buried the hatchet with Tony?
Captain Marvel: Yeah. I'm sure we'll find something to fight about later. *smirks and walks off*
Bruce Banner: *twitches, but smiles to the crowd and keeps going* We've got all kinds here at the Arena. But we know that why you love us so much! My job here is done, so I'd like to hand it off to a man who needs no introduction, SKELETOR! *Claps and walks off*
Skeletor: *waves to the crowd, pumping his fists in the air as they grow wilder and wilder, the makes it to the podium, grabbing the mic* NYEH HEH HEH! Well then. *He stands straight, calm and composed.* You know, everyone, there's been a lot of hoopla today about the money, the fabulous prizes, and that sort of thing, but perhaps we're forgetting why we're really here. *He takes out his Havoc Staff, presses a button on it, and a screen behind him flickers to life*. You see, fights aren't fun because of who wins or loses, or what spoils the victors get. I mean, yeah, kinda hypocritical coming from me since I spent many of my formative years trying to get into a dirty castle. *The audience laughs.* But seriously people, we need to remember the passion, *A scene of Ryu hitting Wii Fit Trainer with a Hadoken to the stomach play*, the raw energy, *A scene of Shulk extending the Monado to stab at Dark Pit plays*, and the exhilaration*A Scene of Duck Hunt Dog and Duck Hunt Duck summoning a giant Zapper to blast at Isabelle plays* of combat! *He pumps his fists in the air and crowd explodes with cheering*
Digi: Really, they hired him to lead the Arena? They had to hire him? Time to rattle this guy's bones.
*Samus lands another kill on Snake, flinging him off with her grapple beam. Diddy is parked off to the side, the Bulborb eagerly waiting behind to see if he gets to eat again. And Bowser has just activated his Smash Ball!*
Sonic: Hey, look out, the big guy's now a Giga guy!
Peach: I think I'll just stay here and watch how crazy this becomes.
Sonic: He's wrecking the other combatants now, thrashing with every flame, spike, and scale! No prisoners being taken!
*Peach blushes slightly at that remark...*
Sonic: Sorry, Princess...I've seen you hold your own though.
*And in the office...*
Digi: Come on, seven-second delay...
*With a press of a button, the AAA video is now hijacked by the feed of the SSS match right as Giga Bowser starts his rampage.*
Digi: That's it! *holds his Digivice to a computer* The one entrance they'll never cover...
*He clicks a few buttons on the monitor, and it begins to glow; he clutches his Digivice and jumps through the glow in the monitor, disappearing from the office.*
Intercom: WARNING, SECURITY BREACH!
*The SSS match suddenly begins playing on the AAA background monitor and all over the AAA Stadium's displays*
Skeletor: What the hell? *Facepalms* Just when I was getting to the good part. Did that boob Noctis phone Domino's without telling us again?
Iron Man: Jarvis, what is going on?
Jarvis: I... think some sort of living being has entered our systems, sir. They've brought some unauthorized video footage with them.
Iron Man: What? But who can even do that?
Jarvis: Some sort of... Digital person... I'm still trying to figure it out...
Iron Man: *loudly smacks one of his hands into the other* That won't do it, Jarvis. Just activate all the defenses. We can't have anyone interrupt our ceremony!
Intercom: MAXIMUM SECURITY ACTIVATED.
*A bunch of walls rise up on the stage, shielding the audience from whatever is about to happen, with a cartoony "We'll be right back!" sign repeated across the walls, as some rather loud intermission music plays.*
Skeletor: Well that's just great! And here I thought we'd prevented all the needless catastrophes by locking Noctis in the basement!
*The main monitor behind Skeletor suddenly explodes, launching Digi out behind him. At the same time, a smoke bomb goes off, and then Yesman dramatically trips off a catwalk by the ceiling of the Stadium and lands on top of Skeletor. Twi appears from behind the smoke, with Mash reluctantly following.*
Twi: We're here to make sure there's nothing to fear!
Yesman: I think I broke my left shoe and my mask in that fall!
Digi: We're going to stop you from replacing the SSS, you... AAA people?
Skeletor: *Is just staring in silence, his jaw agape*
Bruce Banner: ...You don't know what you're messing with, do you?
Twi: Only the most distinguished collection of people who have somehow come together to try and usurp the true Super Smash Stadium!
Digi: And we're going to shut you down right here so that you can't take over from us!
Skeletor: I don't think I need to tell you just how doomed you are.
Bruce Banner: I'd get angry, but I'd probably smash you to bits... and that would be bad for our image. *clenches a fist all the same, trying to control his rage*
Intercom: S.E.C. SYSTEM ENGAGED, CONTAINERS LAUNCHED.
Skeletor: It's fine, Bruce. We have our own security!
*The arena powers up and suddenly surrounds all the SPs with powerful metal cages ringed with electricity*
Mash: Gah! Why didn't we think about them doing this?
Twi: The glowing head seemed to have it all together.
Digi: But I disabled these defenses!
Intercom: What, you thought I wouldn't figure out what you were doing?
Digi: Huh?
Intercom: This is Tony Stark speaking. Now you kids have a lot to answer for. But first, I have to tell you. You've really been a pain in the neck today. You know how many sponsorships might pull out over this?
: Why would we care?
Intercom: ...Nevermind. I'm just going to move you to the Stadium Dungeon. Maybe for once, Noctis was correct for building it... ...still going to just eject you and sue you, only an idiot would give you degenerates free housing.
*Back in the control room, Iron Man is typing away furiously at the computers*
Iron Man: Now Jarvis, could you get this stupid content off of our monitors? It's taken over the entire feed. I mean, just look at it!
*Meanwhile, the actual SSS match has become a rallying point for Bowser. Having stolen the Smash Ball and romped the other combatants as Giga Bowser, he has tightened the match back up...*
Bowser: 300% D13 Snake: 304% D14 Samus: 300% D12 Diddy: 300% D13
Sonic: How about Snake with that grab on Diddy Kong, though? He grips him tight and thrashes him into the slope, taking a huge bounce straight at the Bulborb!
Peach: Samus and Bowser look like they're dancing across the leaves. She's starting to charge another shot but she rolls away.
Sonic: Yeah, she's forgoing that to fire a missile, and it pops Diddy Kong for another kill!
Peach: He seemed the most excited to fight Bowser, but I'm not sure how happy he is now. He throws a banana peel across the big leaf, and Samus trips on it!
Sonic: And the Fortress of Shellitude blasts her outta there!
Peach: Well, speaking of Mario Kart items, Snake has picked up a Green Shell. He bowls it down the slope but everyone avoids it.
Sonic: Not biggie for him, though. He tosses a grenade and catches Bowser with it as Diddy and Samus trade some blows.
Bowser: 300% D14 Snake: 312% D15 Samus: 316% D13 Diddy: 314% D14
Peach: What else is there in those containers?
Sonic: Diddy's found a Beam Sword and he's charging a big swing with it! It takes out Samus and Bowser in one shot, but Samus was still able to throw Snake away!
Peach: Now Snake has decided to, umm...compromise his dignity and wear a Bunny Hood, hoping to stay out of the way of everyone else.
Sonic: There's Samus to knock Diddy out one more time, shoving him away with her blaster, but she's exposed to Snake jumping off his Cypher and firing a missile back at her! And Diddy gets bombed by Bowser!
Jarvis: Yes, sir. I'm isolating it now. There's just something else I have to tell you...
Iron Man: What's that?
*A portal in time and space opens up and before Iron Man can react, he's punched in the face by another, chunkier looking metal fist. He goes flying into the controls behind him, causing sparks to fly.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: NOBODY AAAAS WITH XAVIER RIDGECREST ANYMORE!
Iron Man: Jarvis! Secure the room! Stop him!
Max Headroom: I-I-I don't think so, slick!
Jarvis: Sir, a rogue intelligence is--
*The screens go all crazy in the room while Xavier, who has shiny chromed silver armor, blue shoulderpads and visor, and angular-ish metal pauldrons and a red Q badge as well as a weirdly glowing E-symbol next to it on his chest, takes out his flaming plasma golf club out of thin air and begins smashing panels like a madman*
Xavier Ridgecrest: SO *SMASH* COMPLETELY *SMASH* PRETENTIOUS *SMASH* AND *SMASH* CORPORATIZED! *SMASH SMASH SMASH*
Iron Man: You know those aren't the only panels in this stadium, right? *Flips off most of the screens in the room* And you've just made a huge mistake. You can mess with my security, but you can't do this to me. Not now. I'll tear your helmet off and beat you senseless for that. *Iron Man fires both of his palm beams at Xavier.*
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Swings his golfclub at the beams, causing a loud screech and Iron Man to get blasted in the face with his own beams, throwing him backwards* No! You are not fighting that idiot you shoved off of the arena anymore! He's dead! And I killed him! *Leaps towards where Iron Man is, scraping the ceiling with his helmet and sending ceiling tiles everywhere*
*In the background, the SSS match continues playing.*
*Samus has been able to grab another Smash Ball, this time wasting little before she uses it towards the far stage right of the arena. With little space to hide, all three of her opponents have been knocked out again, with everyone within their last four lives...*
Peach: Amazing! Everyone came back from that Final Smash, but Samus might not be as heavy of a hitter now without her Chozo Suit.
Sonic: Nah, at this point, she's gotta think about speed and not getting knocked out!
Bowser: 308% D17 Snake: 300% D18 Samus: 300% D16 Diddy: D18
Sonic: See? Look at that, she uses the Plasma Whip on Bowser and flings him outta there. But that just attracts Snake and Diddy to gang up on her, I
think it was Diddy that knocked her out with his Rocketbarrels.
Peach: Bowser tears away at Snake under the grasp of the Koopa Klaw, and Diddy grabs a Freezie before it falls off that far edge of the arena. Samus is able to duck underneath though, missing the others in the process.
Sonic: Bowser lets go of Snake, fans the flames on Diddy instead and hurls him off the side, now the little guy's down to his last life--and so is Snake after Samus stunned him with her blaster!
Peach: As Snake returns, Samus prepares to whip Bowser again, but he shields that one. Snake kicks Diddy one more time but he manages to make it back onto the arena.
Sonic: And Bowser pounces on Samus! She goes flying!
Peach: Diddy Kong is knocked out of the match by Snake's explosives!
Sonic: They all meet up in the center after Samus gets back.
Bowser: 306% D18 Snake: 307% D19 Samus: 300% D18 Diddy: OUT
Peach: With one fighter out, it may be easier for them to concentrate, but they still need to act quick--Bowser does with a couple of swipes at Samus but he doesn't send her off the platform. Snake does, though, before turning around and smashing Bowser off.
Sonic: Samus flips herself back onto the leaf and Snake clears her out too! Don't hide, you've still got company!
Peach: Surely enough, Samus whacks Snake with her gun.
Sonic: And Bowser stuns Snake once again, throws him off, and that's it for him! He couldn't quite make it on the last life.
Peach: Samus crouches for a moment and Bowser jumps away, thinking she's going to attack, but that just sets up her jump, kicking him in midair!
Sonic: Outta there!
Iron Man: Look, I'm certain you've become wiser over whatever time or vision quest you've been through. But I'm still me.
Xavier Ridgecrest: That can be changed, you know. *Stands over Iron Man and holds the golf club up with both hands*
*Iron Man fires his missiles at Xavier faster than he can react. Xavier stumbles backwards as his visor cracks some. Iron Man gets up and lasers Xavier in the chest, and then kicks him backwards into a panel, causing more sparks.*
Iron Man: Jarvis, is that disturbance gone?
Jarvis: Regrettably, it only went away because the match it was playing completed.
Iron Man: AAAA! Our greatest fans have been distracted with nonsense from their stupid Stadium! Quick, play some of our highlight footage!
Jarvis: Working on that...
Xavier Ridgecrest: *Whispering while he's over on the floor, bleeding a bit from his injuries, but still able to do things.* Max Headroom, er, Smash Dex, hack the cages.
Max Headroom: Y-Y-You g-g-got it, buddy!
Jarvis: Security malfunction in the arena!
Iron Man: Oh hell no! *Violently kicks Xavier so hard he flies THROUGH a panel and into the ceiling*
Bruce Banner: So... this is a bit anticlimactic.
Skeletor: Well, they were supposed to go to the dungeons!
Intercom: *Continues to play static followed by occasional sounds of metal hitting metal*
Twi: Clearly this means you're losing!
Bruce Banner: Technical difficulties are to be expected when you've been hacking our stadium. You are no better than the villains I've fought before, you know.
Yesman: Yes, but we have a more noble goal than they do.
Bruce Banner: And that is?
Yesman: To continue to be able to have a job that isn't scraping cheese off of the pizza machine at the place I work at.
Bruce Banner: Well if it's at our expense, it's still evil.
Mash: Guys, can we stop engaging the villains in moral discussions and just figure a way out of here already?
Digi: *Is busy using his Digivice on the cage* Almost got it... keep distracting him....
Bruce Banner: Hey! What do you think you're doing there?
*The skylight suddenly darkens, and the entire Stadium shakes from several explosions*
Intercom: SECURITY ALERT: UNKNOWN HOSTILE AIRCRAFT BOMBARDMENT.
Skeletor: Bruce, we have to get out of here! Well, you do, at least. It's not like I can die a second time. *Nervous chuckle*
Bruce Banner: ...You're right, these people must be some sort of distraction.
*Skeletor and Bruce Banner high-tail it out of there*
: I wonder what's causing those explosions...
*And so we continue after the week gap between this and the first half. Confused? Well, read the first half again. Or if you're reading this after this was first posted (10/30/2016), just disregard this line and read straight through.*
Iron Man: *Punches Xavier another time, cracking his armor* You idiot. You can't possibly beat me in a fair fight.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Glad you mentioned that!
Iron Man: Why?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: *pushes a button on a still-working console*
*A monitor lights up. It shows the entire AAA Stadium, now under attack by an entire invasion fleet of space ships. The AAA is dwarfed as a giant Wing Fortress-ship launches hordes of smaller ships and some even deploy ground forces that chase off the fans of the AAA Stadium and blow up parts of the outside. Bombs and SSS posters rain down upon the AAA Stadium as large portions of it are lit on fire. Some force fields come up, only for immense, city-sized white spaceships to show up and brutally annihilate them with massive lasers that cause all the lights to flicker and everything to shake.*
Iron Man: What...
Jarvis: Enemy invasion fleet is considered planetary invasion-class. Should I contact the Avengers?
Bruce Banner: *runs in* Tony! They're everywhere! It's like that time with SHIELD!
Skeletor: *Also runs in* I don't have any reference points to mention, except for the fact we're under attack by too many people to easily stop them in time. I'd suggest tactical retreat.
Iron Man: We have their leader right here! If we kill him, they'll go away!
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Okay, just try me.
Skeletor: Should we really try to attack a foe we hardly know anything about?
Iron Man: It's my Stadium, dammit! We can't let random people with space fleets burn it to the ground!
Bruce Banner: I'm with Tony on this one. We shouldn't kill him, but perhaps if we take him hostage we can get them to repay us for this damage. It'll also buy time for the Avengers to come.
Iron Man: Why haven't Squirrel Girl and Deadpool and the others come to our aid, anyway?
Bruce Banner: Squirrel Girl and Deadpool left, saying there was some situation on Earth. Captain Marvel figured we were up to something malicious and left. And the fighters... well you tried to talk to them, and they were busy, right?
Iron Man: Dammit!
*The fighters for the AAA are rushing towards the control room, having been alerted by Jarvis to Xavier's presence, all of this going on while the previous two segments were ongoing.*
Megaman: Boy, you'd think they would have called for us earlier!
Bayonetta: They said there was some sort of technical difficulties.
Cloud: All I know is that nobody good could attack such a benevolent Stadium. I mean, I've seen a lot of secret conspiracies before, but these people even use non-mako based energy.
Megaman: Dr. Light even recommended this place to us!
Cloud: Whatever the case, we'll make sure they don't take the AAA out. It's been too good to us to let it fall now.
*The trio run up some stairs, where mysterious figures are standing. One is a woman in a blue uniform. She has whitish-purple hair. The other is a Half-Dragon wearing a high-tech visor and some subtle armor, and an octagonal badge with a Q on it. And the third is a shorter than average kitsune-like sorceror, dressed in heavily-enchanted traveller's garments.*
Bayonetta: Hey, who are you people and what are you doing in our way?
Soldier: Here they are.
Half-Dragon: Welp. Was wondering when they'd get here.
Megaman: Hey! You there! Could you get out of the way? We have to save our Stadium!
Soldier: This Stadium is keeping a person of great importance distracted. This person is vital for the restoration of inter-dimensional peace and security, so we would like to aid him without incident if possible. We have no intention of disrupting your activities for but a short time.
Cloud: I don't think that's how it works here. We're not some sort of villains out to conquer the universe.
Half-Dragon: That sort of obliviousness takes me back... Not that I'd care to reminisce, anyway.
Kitsune: Alright, keep 'em off of me while I do the thing. *mashes some keys, and when that inexplicably doesn't work starts charging up a high-voltage spell...*
Soldier: Right. *Casts Freezing Fetters on Megaman*
Megaman: Gah! *Gets frozen solid*
Bayonetta: Don't just stand there, get them!
*Cloud runs at the Half-Dragon with his Buster Sword and swings at him*
*The Half-Dragon counters with Five-Clawed Discount, going to meet Cloud's blade with... a giant-knife arm.*
*Bayonetta goes to run at the Soldier*
*The Soldier casts another offensive spell to push her back*
Kitsune: *draws some sort of rune on the terminal, and starts poofing out with static charge* This is one way to do it... almost there.
*Bayonetta does another quick run attack. The Soldier goes to cast a spell but gets kicked by one of Bayonetta's kicks*
*Megaman breaks out and shoots at the Half-Dragon, who takes a hit*
*The Half-Dragon returns the favor, opening fire on Megaman with a partially-charged Caustic Flare*
Iron Man: *Intercom* What is taking you guys so long?
Megaman: We're under attack by strange people!
Iron Man: *Intercom* Ignore them! Get back to the control room!
Cloud: *In the middle of another attempt to hit the Half-Dragon and clashing with his currently selected blade* We can't! They're blocking us!
Iron Man: *Intercom* Find another way th--
Kitsune: And... shazam! *touches the rune, causing a lot of crackling and magic smoke to come out of the terminal as everything shuts down*
Cloud: What? What did you just do? Tell me, NOW. *Brandishes his sword at Kit*
Kitsune: This! *touches Cloud's Buster Sword, discharging a lighting bolt of static and pushing him back*
Cloud: ... *backs away*
Megaman: Who are these guys? Where do they have these powers from?
Half-Dragon: And that's a wrap, let's go.
Soldier: Again, sorry to leave you so confused about this, since we do know you're just mistaken, rather than evil, but... ...you should really be more careful about who you work for.
Bayonetta: You're not just going to get away so q--
*The other mysterious figures glance to the Kitsune, who activates a weird clock-like device on her wrist, causing all the Questers to vanish*
Bayonetta: --uickly....
Jarvis: Sir, the mysterious people who warped in and out of the Stadium have destroyed our machines. I'm only running on your suit and a few backup nodes that were only of my data specifically.
Iron Man: What? No! Thousands of hours of footage have been erased?
Jarvis: It's worse than that. With the Stadium mostly on fire and crippled inside and out, we can't even contact outside of the dimension without manually heading back.
Bruce Banner: Enough standing around, I've got to end this before it goes any more out of control! *Hulks out*
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Funny words for--
*Xavier is suddenly punched so hard he flies through 3 walls*
Hulk: RARGH! HULK SMASH PUNY Metal Man!
Iron Man: Jarvis! What about those SPs from SSS? We could possibly...
Jarvis: They've escaped.
Iron Man: How? They don't have any of the abilities of those freaks who took out my computer system, or that Xavier guy who smashed my controls.
Jarvis: The computer systems controlling the cages died.
Iron Man: ...
--
Twi: Free at last!
Yesman: But... Digi, you didn't do it!
Digi: Actually I did. *discards wreckage of the cage surrounding him* It's just that... somebody else freed you guys.
*The Mysterious Trio show up in the main arena, as the ceiling continues to crack and fall apart*
Mash: Uh, not to rain on anybody's parade, but strange people have showed up and the roof's about to fall on us.
Soldier: So these are those other people Xavier was talking about?
Half-Dragon: Indeed. Though some of them are a bit, ah... complicated, to put it nicely. *Under his breath* How do you even /get/ ponies from dragons, anyway...?
Digi: *Notices the badge on the Half-Dragon's chest.* Wait, are those other people really Questers, Valron? ...You better not be here to get me over what happened before. It wasn't my idea to build that casino, you know.
Valron: ...Why would we? That was ages ago, and I was the only one that was even there for that. *Points to the Soldier* Nonna and *points to the Kitsune* Catherine weren't.
Digi: Oh.
Twi: You guys know Metal? Really?
Valron: Yes. And we have your condolences, I'm sure.
Catherine: Who knew those were LOAD-BEARING computers?! ...We should probably talk about this when there aren't rocks falling on our heads.
Nonna: Right. There's no real time for introductions. Instead, come close to us and we'll warp you out of here.
Mash: But... should we really trust a bunch of random people who warped in?
Valron: Well, considering that your alternative is being made into pancakes by the collapsing ceiling...
*A huge part of the ceiling as well as a broken monitor lands to the left of Mash, nearly crushing him*
Mash: ...Never mind!
*The group gets together and warps out using Catherine's clock-device.*
*Iron Man walks over to where Xavier landed, which is on the edge of a balcony overlooking the ruined AAA Stadium. Xavier is slowly getting up.*
Iron Man: You... you have stopped at nothing to destroy everything I've worked so hard for. But why? Why did you do this? What could possibly have driven you to do this? I mean... I just need to know before I kill you. The others don't quite understand things as well as I do, but I know better--anyone who deals this much damage has to die.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: It was simple... *Slowly gets up* I wasn't very good at running my own stadium...
Iron Man: Yes, I know that already. *Charges up his lasers for maximum intensity*
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: ...You were destroying that Stadium in the ratings even though it no longer posed a threat to you...
Iron Man: While I understand the sentiment, that's a pretty stupid thing to die for.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: ...And you were being used by Sloan and the Shadows of Revanda... at least, until the former died and the latter was dealt with...
Iron Man: Trying to say a lot of fancy words to make me ask questions and then you can shoot me again? No thanks. It's game over for you.
*Iron Man fires all three of his lasers at Xavier*
*Xavier holds up his Time Device and presses a button, freezing the lasers in time*
Iron Man: What? What is that? Jarvis, you didn't tell me he had an Infinity Gem!
Jarvis: He doesn't.
Iron Man: WHAT?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: There's other dimensions besides the ones you know, Tony. *Picks up the three lasers and hurls them back at Tony as if they were Zeus' thunder*
Iron Man: Impossib--*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*
*The entire top part of the Stadium Xavier and Iron Man is on explodes*
Skeletor: You know, Tony should have killed him by now.
Hulk: Hulk smash puny Metal Man!
Skeletor: YES, now go get him again! I think I hear them fighting--
*The explosion goes off, and all they can see if Iron Man and Xavier falling*
Skeletor: Oh no.
Hulk: Hulk save Tony Stark! *Leaps to grab Iron Man*
*Iron Man is grabbed... while Xavier grabs onto the side of a monitor, hanging off the edge.*
Iron Man: Well... that certainly did it... my suit is too damaged. That such a stupid ripoff of me could do so much damage... that's a horrible joke.
Hulk: Hulk SMASH fake ripoff! *Puts Iron Man down and goes to lunge at Xavier*
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Gah! *Lets go of the cliff, as Hulk slams into the wall*
*Xavier falls, only to eventually land on some sort of very soft gel surface.*
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Oh... Gelato. Thanks for being there for me.
*The goo reforms into a dragon that nods*
Hulk: HULK SMASH DRAGON TOO!
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Quick, let's get in the car.
*Xavier opens a door out of thin air and leaps in with Gelato*
*The Hulk smashes where they were, only to find they've already moved, invisibly.*
Iron Man: No, no, NO! They aren't supposed to survive! Jarvis, where are they?
Jarvis: The invisible vehicle flew out the ceiling and into the giant fortress that attacked us.
Iron Man: Hulk, quick, get to their fortress!
Jarvis: The Fortress used some sort of time magic. It's flown away. We're alone now.
Iron Man: Well... I guess that's it, then.
*Megaman and Cloud and Bayonetta walk in*
Megaman: Iron Man! Sorry we couldn't make it! Some strange people stopped us!
Bayonetta: I hope it isn't too late to save this stadium.
Cloud: I don't know about that...
*The others look around, as the ceiling well and truly finishes caving in. The Hulk casually smashes it away before it can crush everyone.*
Iron Man: No... that's probably a wrap.
Cloud: But why? You got insurance on this place, right?
Iron Man: *sighs* That Noctis person and another one named Sloan most likely fooled me. The best I was ever going to do about it was to destroy the people who came to stop me. But they got away.
Skeletor: We can always just swear revenge and work on our new version of this Stadium!
Jarvis: Unlikely. The ratings for that SSS telecast that was rudely positioned over our own was 3 times that of our award show.
Skeletor: How could that be?
Iron Man: As much as I hate to admit it, tightly controlling everything to make it as close to perfect probably made it too boring after a while. Without the backing of Sloan and the Dark Shadows of Revanda, we couldn't justify building a new Stadium to begin with.
*The Hulk slowly goes back to normal, leaning on a pillar*
Bruce Banner: But I don't understand. Who were those people? Why did an entire space fleet warp in solely to spite us? Why did they wait until our most vulnerable moment? Was somebody feeding them information?
Iron Man: We scheduled everything in advance and made all those ads, remember?
Bruce Banner: But what... why would people attack us like that?
Iron Man: Apparently it's a 'curse' the other Stadium had.
Bruce Banner: Well... I guess I understand now. But maybe we should have planned better?
Jarvis: Our defenses correctly defeated the pony-ninja and shyguy and other-similar-entity based attackers. They basically had no chance. However, we weren't ready for the attack of the strange dragon-hybrid, fox-entity, magic-wielding viking sorceress, radioactive armor person army.
Iron Man: In short, you can't plan for something like this. It's more a question of whether we want to go on. And having realized I was just duped, I think I have better ideas.
Bruce Banner: What's that?
Iron Man: We can build a new one back home, after we get done interrogating Noctis. He's still there in the dungeon, after all. If we can figure out what he and the shadowy people used to help us get so successful, then we don't need to do it here anymore.
Skeletor: Sounds like a plan!
*All assembled in the Wing Fortress, the SPs and the Questers and Xavier are there as they head back to the SSS Stadium.*
Digi: So... you've been doing a lot while I was gone, Xavier.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Long story short, I have my own country and planet to worry about. Really I don't know what to do--this Stadium was something I took on when I was drunk and out of my mind. It's not something I plan on doing now that I have these greater concerns, you know?
Twi: Awww, but why can't you do both?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: You saw how well that went. My foes came here and messed things up and let even weirder people make it all even worse!
Digi: Just who were those people you sent to save us, anyway?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: The Questers.
Digi: But what Questers?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Well you know Valron, he was the Half-Dragon guy. The soldier woman was Nonna, who hails from a planet far away, and has a lot of magical powers... and the kitsune was Catherine, who is from a tribe on Alsa.
Digi: Oh no, not Alsa!
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Don't worry, she doesn't hold any grudges against you. You destroyed the casino, which was really sort of a plague on her world and--
Mash: *Clears his throat, loudly.* This is all fascinating, but who will run the SSS if you're gone?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: I'm not certain, yet. Here, I'll make a compromise: I'll 'run' it until we find somebody.
Mash: I guess that's okay.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: I did you guys a great favor, now. I cleaned up my mess. Tony Stark and his weird outsiders will think thrice before coming into this realm ever again.
Digi: What if they come after you?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: We're fighting the Time Cops, who would delight in a reason to destroy people trying to destroy us.
Digi: Oh.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: In short, if they visit my realm now, they'll just be attacked by godlike beings even I can't figure out how to defeat.
Yesman: But without you, it'll be so lonely!
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Aw... you don't need to worry that much. I can still tell you what to do from afar if you really want that. But I don't think you do.
: What about what Game Guru and Saiyaman said long ago?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: You saw what happened to Tony and his stadium there. I have one simple thing I'm gonna help guarantee from now on: If there's some major crisis, it's not gonna be when the SSS Stadium is trying to do its finale. And if Game Guru and Saiyaman have something to complain or add about... great! They can help contribute while they're here complaining.
Mash: I hate to break it to you, but most of the fans are gone.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Duh. This is more just for my own loose ends. Who needs fans? Who needs anything? We should just do what we want.
Mash: What? Really?
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Here, I'll show you what I mean. Mash Toady, YOU run the Stadium! *Pins the Head SP badge on Mash*
Mash: What? How? Why? I... I... *faints*
Twi: You really got him there, Metal!
Yesman: I guess I'll get used to saying yes to him, whenever I visit.
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: With that handled, my business here is done. I'll check in on what Mash is doing in case he completely runs away or something nasty happens. Otherwise... this is up to you. And if you're done with it, then you can close it. I mean, it's been over a decade now, and a lot has changed. Maybe you don't even need a Stadium to run anymore.
Twi: I guess...
: We'll bug you if we need you. I know exactly what to do!
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: Sounds great. And by great, I mean I'm pre-emptively destroying all up-arrow C-buttons on any N64 controllers I find.
: Hey--
{Xavier Ridgecrest}: --And there's your Stadium! See you!
*The SPs are warped back into SSS Stadium by a strange warp pipe summoned by the Super Smash Quest Stadium's Warp Machine. Some fans have shown up to see the aftermath of that match from earlier*
Bowser: Oh hey, all the big shots made it back!
Digi: Yeah we did, and uh...how'd it go?
Bowser: The action chick knocked me out and CQC here never got to his chopper!
Samus: Please, you'd be barking if it was Snake or Diddy Kong that won.
Bowser: I'm just telling him what happened. He's probably going to be packing up his bags and running out of here by the end of the night--
Digi: Uhhh, no? I don't think I'd want it to be that easy.
Snake: And as much as I would like to get a free ride, everyone and everything is blowing up around me.
Bowser: See? We had explosions!
Peach: *shaking her head* Sometimes his head is more pointed than his shell...
Sonic: He's got a personality anyway.
Digi: Well, the match finished, and we did what we needed to do.
Diddy: That match worked?!
Digi: You spend enough time around our boss, you learn a few things. Nice job, everyone.
Sonic: So you're getting outta here before you get into the deep end?
Digi: Just like you, Sonic, I probably haven't even touched the water yet when you compare me to him. Hopefully we can clean up a few more things around here and keep it going.
Sonic: Good call.
Digi: I think that's a wrap for today though...just like any other day around here, I guess. *looks to the others*
Twi: This is a lot to take in. The old status quo is totally gone, as if it were blown away in a year long crossover event with lots of splash pages.
Yesman: I'm still starving.
Twi: (slaps her forehead) Figures that I was forgetting something more important. To the Burger Trench! Or maybe White Castle. (scoops up Yesman and disappears with another smoke bomb)