(Open to set in SSS. It has two chairs, one for the host and one for the contestant. The host, the Great Saiyaman from DBZ, is sitting in the host chair.)
Saiyaman: Hello, SSS! Welcome to the newest fad to the Super Smash Stadium, "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!
Saiyaman: I'm your host, the Great Saiyaman!
Crowd: (Boos.)
Saiyaman: Now wait; let me explain the game to you. Here, you compete for the chance to be nominated to become a Superpower of the SSS!
Crowd: Really?
Saiyaman: No.
Crowd: Awwwhhh...
Saiyaman: C'mon, like I can really do that! Let me explain the game: Each time, one contestant will come out and compete in three tests: Knowledge, Creativity and Battle. The winner gets nothing, but on the freak chance a real Superpower sees this, they could actually be nominated to be a Superpower! But, don't quote me on that. Now, let me introduce my co-host, this mysterious voice!
Mysterious voice (no one can see him): Thank you. Just call me "The Voice."
Saiyaman: "The Voice," huh? Say, are you the same voice that did "Ask Sonic"?
Voice: Why, yes. I'm also co-hosting "Ask Mario."
Saiyaman: Good to have you onboard, Voice. Anyhow, since this is the first installment and I know none of the Stadium's fans, the first contestant shall be...me!
Voice: What a surprise.
Saiyaman: Can it, Voice. I don't see anyone else volunteering. So, the hosting duties will fall on Shadow, from Sonic Adventure 2!
(Shadow enters and sits down in the hosting seat.)
Crowd: YYAAAAAYYYYHHHHH!
Shadow: Of course. They should be honored to be in the presence of the ultimate life form.
Saiyaman: Sure you are. Well, let's get the show started!
Voice: Hang on, Saiyaman. Don't we have to explain something?
Saiyaman: You're right! I forgot to explain how other fans can be contestants on my show! If you would like to be a contestant, please send an e-mail to mkburket@hotmail.com with your name, some basic info on yourself, a list of moves to fight with and three opponents who you would like to fight in the Battle section. Remember, I may not use all the opponents you suggest and if you win or lose, it's nothing personal.
Voice: You didn't explain the whole thing.
Saiyaman: Patience, Voice. Since this is only the first episode, I thought I'd give audiences a little taste of this show first.
Voice: From what I've seen so far, a little taste is all you really want.
Saiyaman: HEY! Not funny, Voice!
Shadow: Can we start now? I have to go beat Sonic in an hour.
Saiyaman: Very well. Let's play "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!
(Corny music plays.)
Shadow: The first challenge is knowledge! Saiyaman, answer as many of these questions as you can in the time limit of two minutes.
Saiyaman: Ready!
Voice: How many fighters did the Stadium have at the start?
Saiyaman: 15, not counting Superpowers.
Shadow: Name two fighters who died.
Saiyaman: Ash and Kirbetty.
Voice: What Final Fantasy weapon is Ultima X based off of?
Saiyaman: Ultima Weapon, from Final Fantasy 7.
Shadow: How many people are watching this show right now?
Saiyaman: Trick question; it's impossible to tell.
Voice: Name three Superpowers who have retired.
Saiyaman: Luigi Man, Goshi and VGW.
Shadow: Who won match 27?
Saiyaman: Mario.
Voice: What item recovers all health instantly?
Saiyaman: The Yoshiyuki.
Shadow: What official Stadium item has never been used since its debut match?
Saiyaman: Chaos Emeralds.
Voice: What is Sonic the Hedgehog's middle name?
Saiyaman: The.
TIME!
Voice: Not surprisingly, Saiyaman has passed round one with a perfect score! Then again, he did pick all the questions...
Shadow: Now for round two: Creativity! No man can be a Superpower without creative juices flowing through his veins. In this round, the contestant, Saiyaman, must think of a creative solution to the following problem. Editor's Note:We have juices in our veins??
Saiyaman: So, what's the problem?
Shadow: We have no problem, that's the problem! You never wrote a problem to creatively solve!
Saiyaman: Well, it would be cheating if I knew the scenario ahead of time, wouldn't it?
Voice: Like you knew all the questions?
Saiyaman: Er...........let's move to the final section: Battle!
(Saiyaman leaves for the battle arena.)
Shadow: Let me explain how this works. Our combatant will have two lives. He'll face two opponents, one life each. He must, of course, fight and win each battle.
Voice: There will be no items in any of the following matches. Also, no health will be recovered for the fighter at any time.
Shadow: Let show his B moves for our home viewers...
Voice: Saiyaman has chosen his arena to be Graveyard Romp.
Shadow: I thought that arena was still under construction.
Voice: Saiyaman made his own version. I'll put up a picture of it.
Voice: The tombstones act as obstacles and must be avoided. Projectiles can't pass through them.
Shadow: I see. What about those lumpy things in the sky?
Voice: The "lumpy things" are gloomy rain clouds. It's raining in this arena, which makes the floors harder to move on without sliding slightly. Also, lightning can come down from the clouds onto the arena at any time, electrifying the area it hits.
Shadow: Can I assume that if a fighter has hit with lightning, it will act like Pikachu's Thunder attack?
Voice: That's correct.
Shadow: As useful as all this information is, why has this particular arena been selected?
Voice: Here, the dead fighters can participate in battles along side regular fighters. Saiyaman wanted to fight some of his favorite dead fighters, and this is the only place to do it in.
Shadow: So, the dead people can fight and participate as they did when they were alive, damage percents and all?
Voice: Correct. They can even grab items and use their B moves.
Shadow: Now, let's see who the fighters are for Saiyaman...
Fighter 1: Yoshelly
Fighter 2: Ash
Voice: By the way, Saiyaman's battle initials will be SA.
Shadow: Thank you, Voice.
Voice: Well, it's time to start the match. I see Saiyaman flying and doing a funky dance intro. Scary. Ah, there's Yoshelly's spirit rising from the grave to do battle.
****Begin Corny Intro****
Shadow: Time for the introductions. Ladies and gentlemen, Super Smash Stadium brings you...
Voice: THE ALL-SEEING, BUT NEVER SEEN, VOICE!
Shadow: THE ULTIMATE LIFE FORM, SHADOW!
Both: THE COMENTATORS!
Shadow: Now, for the fifteen or so in attendance...
Voice: And for the sixty-one reading world-wide...
Shadow: UNLEASH THE CHAOS!
Voice: Yoshelly starts off by jumping forward and using Hip Drop, but Saiyaman dodges and fires an Energy Blast.
Shadow: Yoshelly counters with the classic Eggify move, turning Saiyaman into an egg which she kicks constantly.
Voice: But Saiyaman escapes and uses his Flying Uppercut to land on the upper-left platform. Yoshelly throws an egg at him for a direct hit.
Shadow: Saiyaman drops down, throws a couple of quick punches, followed by Turbo Speed. However, he stops his dash to the left before he goes over the edge!
SA: 35% Yg: 40%
Voice: Using this to his advantage, Saiyaman turns, grabs Yoshelly and throws her. She lands on the left ledge next to the tombstone there, but what's Saiyaman doing?
Shadow: Duh! He's charging his next attack.
Saiyaman: Ka...me...ha...me...ha!
Voice: Holy smokes! A direct Kamehameha hit has knocked Yoshelly upward and outward; she was too close to the edge!
Shadow: Wouldn't that tombstone have prevented that?
Voice: No, the blast sent her upward as well as back.
ROUND ONE'S WINNER: THE GREAT SAIYAMAN!
Voice: Round two begins now, with Ash returning from the great beyond on the main level behind Saiyaman, ready to fight!
Shadow: Using his yo-yo attack and a Pokefire, he's taken an early lead.
SA: 57% A: 0%
Voice: Saiyaman doesn't take that lightly! He's leapt over to Ash, using a midair attack and a Flying Uppercut to inflict damage!
Shadow: Ash escapes to the upper platform with Saiyaman in pursuit, using another midair attack! Oh no! A lightning bolt struck the platform and fried them both!
Voice: No one died, though and Saiyaman launches a few Energy Blasts.
Shadow: Ash leaps and uses a Pokefire to fry Saiyaman! Saiyaman's in real trouble! His damage percent is going sky-high!
SA: 82% A: 34%
Voice: The lightning took the most out of him. But, as Ash lands, Saiyaman uses a smash punch to knock him down off the platform! Ash is using a double jump to come back only to be on the receiving end of another smash, only it's a low Smash!
Shadow: Ash is using the Pokethunder to blast himself back, but Saiyaman's charging another Kamehameha in preparation!
SA: 82% A: 60%
Saiyaman: Kaaaaaaa.....meeeeeeeee.....
Voice: Ash has struck himself with the Pokethunder...
Saiyaman: Haaaaaaa....meeeeeee....
Shadow: He thrown forward, landing on the same level as Saiyaman...
Saiyaman: HAAAAAAAAA!
Shadow: WHOA! Saiyaman sent an even more powerful Kamehameha into Ash and sent him flying clear out!
THE WINNER: THE GREAT SAIYAMAN!
(Saiyaman returns to the set with his headgear back on, concealing his identity.)
Shadow: Tragically, you've won, Saiyaman, so you get to be a Superpower, I guess...
Saiyaman: Nah.
Everyone who read this: WHAT?!?!?!
Saiyaman: I don't deserve the right to be a Superpower. Frankly, I know I don't have what it takes.
(An incredible round of applause and cheers erupts from the crowd.)
Saiyaman: Goodbye, Shadow. Feel free to co-host anytime you want.
Voice: He can have my job...
Saiyaman: Voice, you've only been here a day. Don't give up on this just yet!
Voice: I'll try, but I think I like "Ask Mario" better.
Saiyaman: Well, whatever. Anyways, see you next time here on "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!
(Corny music and fade out. Then fade in to the show stage.)
Saiyaman: If you would like to be a contestant on this show, please send an e-mail to mkburket@hotmail.com with the subject "Contestant" to apply.
Voice: Please include your name and some basic background information about yourself. Also, a list of B moves for the Battle section is required.
Saiyaman: You may pick the three opponents you wish to battle. They can be any SSS character you want, including dead ones. However, they can't be all the same, like three Jigglypuffs. Also, I have the write to place you against different opponents as I wish.
Voice: Please note however, that we can't actually make you a Superpower in any way. This is only for fun and you cannot receive nor donate any actual prizes in any way.
Saiyaman: Limit of one application per person, please. Extra applications from the same person will be deleted upon arrival. Sorry for all the strict rules, but it has to be done. See you next time!