Who Wants to be a Superpower?

Voice: Welcome to another edition of "Who Wants to be a Superpower?", the show with an inferiority complex far superior to yours! Now, the only guy here who likes Big the Cat's theme song, the Great Saiyaman!

(Yup, we're back to the old set, with nothing really having changed from previous shows.)

Saiyaman: Wait...I am?

Voice: Yup, we took a poll and you're the only in the studio who likes it.

Saiyaman: Heh, you learn something new everyday. Welcome to another exciting episode, folks!

Voice: Hey, didn't you say you had to ask something to our audience?

Saiyaman: Yeah, but that'll have to wait until the end of the show. Now, let's give it up for today's contestant, Knight9910!

(Knight walks in and sits down.)

Saiyaman: Nice to have the show, Knight.

Knight: No prob.

Saiyaman: Tell us a little about yourself.

Knight: Well, as you can see, I'm an android, I used to work here as an SP and I'm a communist.

Saiyaman: I thought he was a utopianist.

Voice: I heard he was an atheist.

Knight: It's communist!

Saiyaman: Okay then, you're a communist.

Knight: Good.

Saiyaman: Anyways, your prize this week is a complete barbeque grill with a propane tank and temperature control!

Knight: I thought those were standard with gas grills.

Voice: In this show's budget, the wheels on the grill were optional.

Knight: You've gotta get talk Zer into getting this show more funding.

Saiyaman: Don't we, though? We'll discuss that later, for it's time to play "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!

(Lookie, it's the dimming lights with dramatic music!)

Saiyaman: Since we don't even have enough budget to change the order in which we do these, we're starting off with Knowledge! All set?

Knight: You bet!

Voice: What is the name of Van Von Hunter's sidekick?

Knight: I don't know. Nobody does.

Saiyaman: When does Halley's Comet pass by the Earth?

Knight: Once every seventy-five years.

Voice: How many episodes of Star Ocean EX were made?

Knight: Twenty-six.

Saiyaman: Who was the winner of the Stadium's first Mario Party match?

Knight: Luigi.

Voice: In what season of Star Trek: The Next Generation did Tasha Yar die in?

Knight: The first season.

Saiyaman: Will George Bush EVER do anything compitently as president?

Knight: Not unless he leaves.

TIME!

Voice: I hope there aren't any Republicans in the audience.

Saiyaman: You've passed, so we're on to Creativity! Today's challenge: an army of evil moths is descending upon the Stadium! What do you do?

Knight: ...moth balls?

Saiyaman: That's close enough for me! Now on to the fighting!

(Knight leaves for the arena.)

Saiyaman: The rules are unchanged, as it's three foes with a mere two lives. Let's see that moveset one more time...

  • B: Blitz Blade (Like Fox's Laser only shocks enemies.)
  • B>: Screaming Blast (Fires a burst of electricity in the form of a screaming skull straight forward.)
  • B^: Sapphire Spike (Rockets forward holding his sword out, if it hits, Knight jumps straight up.)
  • Bv: Paradox Equation (Creates two conflicting energies and brings them together in a large explosion. This hurts enemies like Electrode's Self Destruct but doesn't affect Knight at all.)

    Saiyaman: Today, we've got the most interesting combatant choices we've had on the show. Knight wishes to fight Tron, but he also wants to fight Navi.

    Voice: Navi? Our interviewer?

    Saiyaman: That's why he asked for. Anyways, Navi agreed to fight, but Knight also wanted to himself, or more specifically, he wanted to himself with the moves he had while he spent time here as an SP. Of course, there was only one logical way to do that...

    Voice: You don't mean...?

    Saiyaman: (Dramtic pose.) Time travel! Using a time machine, I went back in time to when Knight was still an SP and convinced him to come with me to the future to battle a worthy opponent! (Stops posing.)

    Voice: I just hope you take him back once he's done here.

    Saiyaman: Of course, Voice. We can't afford to have history-as-we-know-it to get messed up. Anyways, Knight's initals will be KN and the arena is Final Destination. I see that Tron and Knight are already in the arena, so let's get this going!

    ***Begin Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, species of all kinds...

    Voice: SSS is bringing you once again...

    Saiyaman: THE STAFF MEMBER, SAIYAMAN!

    Voice: THE UNSEEN, BUT ALWAYS HEARD VOICE!

    Both: YOUR SSS COMMENTATORS!

    Saiyaman: And now for the ten thousand in attendance...

    Voice: And for anyone in the government we may have offended...

    Saiyaman: IT'S SMASHING TIME!

    ***End Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Tron starts off with a nice Bonne Strike, but Knight rolls away from that and slices her up with his sword! Tron takes a few hits, but connects with a Rocket Punch!

    Voice: Knight responds with a Screaming Blast, then closes in and throw Tron! However, she flies only a small distance and smacks him with the Activate! move! With Knight stunned, she Smashes him good!

    Saiyaman: Knight gets back up and stuns Tron briefly with a Blitz Blade, then dashes in and hits with a Sapphire Spike! However, his upperward rocket has allowed Tron time to leap up and knock him back to the ground!

    Voice: Knight is back up after that move and Smashes Tron as she comes down! Tron is back up and fires another Rocket Punch, but Knight shields against the blow!

    Saiyaman: Knight runs back and slices with his sword some more, then backs off as Tron tries to counter-attack his moves!

    KN: 31% TB: 62%

    Voice: Knight leaps back in to attack, but Tron uses the Bonne Strike, followed by a throw! Knight gets back up and uses a low Smash, followed up with a Screaming Blast!

    Saiyaman: Tron fires the Activate!, but it fails, so she dashes at Knight, who shields against her running attack and throws her!

    Voice: Tron is up, but Knight uses his Paradox Equation move! The resulting explosion has blown Tron clear out of the arena!

    Saiyaman: Now, Navi enters the arena! She starts off by swinging her sword at Knight, scoring a hit!

    Voice: Knight hops back and fires a Blitz Blade, but Navi uses her Enemy Bait move to reflect it back into Knight! Navi moves in to score some hits, but Knight recovers and throws her away!

    Saiyaman: Navi fires her Navi Sword Blast at Knight, who dodges and slices at her with his own sword! He strikes twice with it before Navi knocks him back with the Helicopter Slash!

    Voice: Knight strikes back with a Smash attack, sending Navi over to the edge, but she lands safely and charges at Knight, striking with a running attack! Knight returns that damage with two more sword slices!

    Saiyaman: Navi throws Knight using her hookshot, then fires another Navi Sword Blast at him! Knight fires several Blitz Blades at her, then dashes in and slashes her!

    KN: 82% Navi: 57%

    Voice: Knight Smashes Navi again, then throws her off the edge! Navi manages to get back using the Helicopter Slash, hitting Knight, but Knight does an upward Smash on her, then uses a Meteor Smash on her while she's in the air! Navi goes down and out!

    Saiyaman: That just leaves SP Knight, who enters the arena armorless! The two exchange pre-battle conversation!

    SP Knight: You have nice man-boobs.

    Knight: Thanks. Yours are quite nice as well.

    SP Knight: We should get to battling now, should we?

    Knight: Good idea.

    Voice: Insightful as always. SP Knight starts off using his Lunar Ray attack, scoring a hit! The two of them begin exchanging sword blows, Knight gaining the upper hand!

    Saiyaman: SP Knight throws Knight away, then leaps at him to attack, but Knight rolls underneath him and strikes with the Screaming Blast! SP Knight counters that attack with his Rising Thunder!

    Voice: Knight Smashes SP Knight, who low-attacks Knight and uses the Lightning Condor! The blow sends Knight flying out of the arena!

    Saiyaman: Knight has returned on the platform and uses the invicibility to use the Paradox Equation move! SP Knight manages to get away before the energies collide, but still gets caught on the outer edge of the explosion!

    Voice: Knight low-Smashes SP Knight, but SP Knight responds with a running attack! The two of them engage in another slashing bout, but SP Knight throws Knight away!

    KN: 21%D1 SPKN: 36%

    Saiyaman: The two of them continue to attack each other, but Knight throwsSP Knight and fires off two Blitz Blades! SP Knight responds to this by firing a Lunar Ray and slamming into Knight!

    Voice: The two of them seem to be evenly matched as they continue to duel! Knight uses his Sapphire Spike to score a hit, but SP Knight retaliates with a Smash!

    Saiyaman: Knight quickly slashes SP Knight, then hits him with a Screaming Blast and throws him! As SP Knight gets up, Knight Smashes him!

    Voice: SP Knight gets serious and bulks up with the Final Crusade move! Using his super-enhanced stats, SP Knight slams into Knight and Smashes him, inflicting major damage!

    Saiyaman: Knight continues to fight, but SP Knight is really laying on the hurt now! Knight up-Smashes him, then kicks him in mid-air!

    Voice: This looks like it! Both of them use the Paradox Equation move! They both connect...and both of them go flying out of the arena! Who won?

    Saiyaman: I'm not sure. Let's go to the instant replay!

    (According to instant replay, both fighters were KOed at exactly the same time.)

    Saiyaman: Well, technically, Knight did pass all three of the challenges, but he also lost one, so I guess he won...barely.

    Knight: Whew, that was a tough fight.

    SP Knight: I'll say. It's good to see I keep getting stronger in the future.

    Saiyaman: Well, at least things worked out. Roll that beautiful blue screen!

    (The blue screen appears again.)

    If you would like to be a contestant on this show, please send an e-mail to Saiyaman with the subject “Contestant” to apply. Please include your name and some basic background information about yourself. Also, a list of B moves for the Battle section is required. You may pick the three opponents you wish to battle. They can be any SSS character you want, including dead ones. However, they can’t be all the same. Also, we have the right to place you against different opponents as we wish. Please note however, that we can’t actually make you a Superpower in any way. This is only for fun and you cannot receive nor donate any actual prizes in any way. Limit of one application per person. Extra applications from the same person will be deleted upon arrival.

    Voice: Well, folks, this is the Voice, wishing you all a good night!

    Saiyaman: Don't worry, folks, I'll be taking SP Knight back to his original time now.

    Knight: Sayonara!

    SP Knight: See ya!

    (Fade out.)