Who Wants to be a Superpower?

Voice: Welcome to the "Who Wants to be a Superpower?", the show that requires absolutely no financial support whatsoever...yeah, right! Now, you are getting veeeerrrrrry sleeeeeeepy, it's our host...yawwwwnnnn...(falls asleep.)

(Here we go, at the set.)

Saiyaman: Thank you for that stirring introduction, Voice.

Voice: (Sound asleep.)

Saiyaman: HEY, VOICE! TIME TO WAKE UP!

Voice: (Out like a light.)

Saiyaman: Great. Well, since this is our twentith episode, we should do something special, so I've brought a special co-host in. Please welcome Axl from the Megaman X games!

(The audience cheers as Axl walks in and sits down.)

Saiyaman: Thanks for coming by, Axl.

Axl: No prob. Finally gets me out of the base, y'know?

Saiyaman: True. Well, let's keep the show going by introducing our contestant, Mr. Destroyer!

(Mr. Destroyer walks out and sits down.)

Saiyaman: Thanks for being on the show, Mr. Destroyer.

Mr. Destroyer: Hey, no problem. I'm glad to be here.

Saiyaman: So, tell us a little about yourself.

Mr. Destroyer: I seek out evil wherever it may lurk and destroy it!

Axl: Sounds productive, but I think I'll stick with Mavericks myself.

Saiyaman: Well, for you, the prize tonight is for those of you who've wanted to see London, France, Italy, Switzerland...yes, folks, our prize is a road map of Europe! (Holds it out.)

Mr. Destroyer: I might make use of that.

Saiyaman: Good. Now, let's play some "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!

(The lights dim and some dramatic music plays.)

Saiyaman: It's time for Knowledge! Ready?

Mr. Destroyer: I guess so.

Axl: How old is Mickey Mouse?

Mr. Destroyer: Seventy-five years old.

Saiyaman: What's the name of the final boss in Kirby 64?

Mr. Destroyer: O2.

Axl: How do you unlock the classic Yoshi's Island stage in SSBM?

Mr. Destroyer: Score over 1500 ft. in one hit in the Home-Run Contest.

Saiyaman: What is the cause of Rudolph's shiny nose?

Mr. Destroyer: Some sort of genetic mutation, I think.

Axl: How many days are there in Hannukah?

Mr. Destroyer: Eight.

Saiyaman: How does Mario get to the moon in Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door?

Mr. Destroyer: A really big cannon.

TIME!

Saiyaman: Good job. Now, let's move to the Creativity problem: you've begun to feel as though nobody appreciates you for who you are and you crave attention. Now, without killing anybody or serious property destruction, how do you get it?

Mr. Destroyer: Hmm...I could throw a party!

Saiyaman: Sure, sounds good to me. We'll be right back.

(Commerical break!)

175: (Walks out in a business suit.) Hello, everyone. I'm not here to talk to you as a famous person or even an infamous one. I'm here to talk to you about one of the great dangers in society today: selling your soul. Now, to you, it may seem like selling your soul is the "cool" thing to do, like all the kids are doing it, but it's not. Every year, hundreds of innocent people are damned to hell for all eternity, merely for a few brief moments of fame and glory. Now, you tell me: is eternal pain and torment worth it? I know in the end, that decision is ultimately up to you, but if I've managed to help just one person retain their soul, I've done my job. Thank you and good night.

(Back to the show.)

Axl: That was...informative.

Saiyaman: Welcome back. Now, it's time for the arena section of the show. As par tradition, it's only two lives for three foes and no items. Let's check out his moveset...

  • B: Omega3 Slash: Link's Spin Attack with the blade thrown at the end
  • B + Up: Summon: summons Necron from FF9 or a giga version of himself
  • B + Side: Twenty Shots: Fires one to twenty weak shots
  • B + Down: Sin Harvest: Eight consecutive slashes and a summon

    Axl: He's gonna need everyone of those moves, as his opponents choices are Mewtwo, Crazy Hand and Giga Bowser!

    Saiyaman: He's either extremly confident or suicidal. Since we have no other arena large enough for Crazy Hand and Giga Bowser, the arena is Final Destination. Mr. Destoyer's initals are MD. Well, the first opponent for tonight, Mewtwo, is already in the arena and Mr. Destroyer has just walked in himself, so let's get things started!

    ***Begin Corny Intro***

    Axl: Ladies and gentlemen...

    Saiyaman: Boys and girls...

    Axl: Reploids of all ages...

    Saiyaman: SSS has brought you once again...

    Axl: THE ROOKIE HUNTER AXL!

    Saiyaman: HAPPY-HOST SAIYAMAN!

    Both: YOUR SSS COMMENTATORS!

    Saiyaman: Now, for the thirty-three thousand in attendance...

    Axl: And for the fourty-five thousand watching world-wide...

    Saiyaman: IT'S SMASHING TIME!

    ***End Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer starts things off with his Twenty Shots move, but he only fires five, though each of them manages to hit Mewtwo! Mewtwo uses his Teleport to get in close, then Smashes Mr. Destroyer!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer starts punching Mewtwo, but Mewtwo grabs him and throws him upward! Mr. Destroyer tries coming down on Mewtwo with an aireal attack, only to have Mewtwo shield against it!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer isn't stopped by a shield, pounding on it with a Smash attack and several kicks! The shield is shattered, leaving Mewtwo open to a Omega3 Slash, knocking him back!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer charges at Mewtwo and hits with his running attack, leaving Mewtwo to counter by zapping Mr. Destroyer with Disable! Mewtwo hops back and charges a Shadow Ball while Mr. Destroyer recovers, then chucks it at him, scoring a hit!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer is getting rather mad, closing in and using his Sin Harvest, hitting four times before Mewtwo manages to back out! To finish his move, he summons Necron!

    Mewtwo: ...that's just plain unfair.

    Axl: No kidding. Maybe you should impose some sort of limit on movesets.

    Saiyaman: Yeah, I'll work on that next time. Anywho, Necron uses a smash, but Mewtwo manages to leap back, only taking a small portion of the attack! Mewtwo then dashes in after Necron leaves and slams Mr. Destroyer with a running attack!

    MD: 54% Mtw: 76%

    Axl: Mewtwo begins smack Mr. Destroyer like crazy, probably out of annoyance from that summon! He throws Mr. Destroyer off the ledge, but Mr. Destroyer leaps back up and throws Mewtwo off instead!

    Saiyaman: Mewtwo leaps back up onto the ledge, but Mr. Destroyer is waiting with a Smash attack! Mewtwo falls off again, but gets behind Mr. Destroyer using Teleport and kicks him off!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer grabs the edge of the arena, pulling himself and kicking Mewtwo in the process! He grabs Mewtwo and chucks him off the ledge - again - then uses the Omega3 Slash to knock him too far away to survive!

    Saiyaman: That brings us to Crazy Hand! We toned his HP down to 150 for this fight. Crazy Hand takes the offensive by flopping on the ground, but Mr. Destroyer managed to run away from that attack!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer fires off his Twenty Shots attack, hitting with six of his eleven shots as Crazy Hand picks himself up! Crazy Hand swipes in and grabs Mr. Destroyer, but Mr. Destroyer manages to break free and smacks Crazy Hand with an aireal attack!

    Saiyaman: Crazy Hand starts powering up his missile attack, so Mr. Destroyer slices him with his Omega3 Slash, dodging one missile but getting hit by the other two! Crazy Hand takes a poke at Mr. Destroyer, who shields the first blow, then rolls back from the other two and fires his Twenty Shots, hitting with all seven!

    Axl: Crazy Hand flings himself into the background and rockets forward, only to have Mr. Destroyer leap over his attack and Smashes him when he comes back in! Mr. Destroyer leaps up and attacks Crazy Hand again, who walks on his fingertips and kicks Mr. Destroyer!

    MD: 108% Crazy Hand: 98 HP

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer leaps up and uses his Sin Harvest, hitting with all eight slices and summoning his giga version, who preforms a huge sword slice! After the attack, Crazy Hand manages to grab Mr. Destroyer and slams him into the ground!

    Axl: Crazy Hand pokes at Mr. Destroyer again! Mr. Destroyer shields, but his shield is broken in the process, leaving him open as Crazy Hand zips in from the background with his flying fist job, blowing Mr. Destroyer out of the arena!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer has come back on the revival platform, not looking too happy. He makes a mad dash at Crazy Hand, leaping and slicing! Crazy Hand flies overhead and slams down, but Mr. Destroyer was still invincible!

    Axl: That invincibility's gone now, so Crazy Hand strikes with his drilling attack, scoring multiple hits! Mr. Destroyer up-Smashes Crazy Hand, then leaps back and avoids Crazy Hand's missile attack!

    Saiyaman: Crazy Hand does his spider-crawl towards Mr. Destroyer, who leaps over him and uses his Omega3 Slash! Crazy Hand flies overhead and begins dropping explosives, so Mr. Destroyer rolls out of the way, taking a small bit of an explosion from one of the bombs!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer leaps up and smacks Crazy Hand while he's dropping his bombs, but takes another bomb hit in exchange! Crazy Hand floats back into position, then flies in from the background with his fingers extended, only to have it dodged!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer launches his Twenty Shots move to fire twelve bullets with ten of them hitting as Crazy Hand flies away to flop on top of Mr. Destroyer! Mr. Destroyer responds with a Smash Attack!

    MD: 47%D1 Crazy Hand: 48 HP

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer rushes in and slices at Crazy Hand, who grabs him! Mr. Destroyer breaks free of Crazy Hand's grip and uses his Sin Harvest, slicing wiht all eight hits, but his summon is dodged as Crazy Hand flies into the background to attack!

    Saiyaman: Crazy Hand's flying fist move is dodged, leaving him open to an upward-Smash as he returns! As Crazy Hand warms up some more missiles,
    Mr. Destroyer delivers the final blow, taking him out!

    Axl: Now comes the big challenge: Giga Bowser! His Whirling Fortress opener freezes Mr. Destroyer instantly!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer breaks free, but Giga Bowser helps him warm up with his Fire Breath attack, torching Mr. Destroyer! Mr. Destroyer gets in and throws him, then uses a quick Smash!

    Axl: Giga Bowser does some weak slashes, then hops up and over when Mr. Destroyer tries his Sin Harvest, smacking him in the back! Mr. Destroyer leaps back and fires all twenty of his Twenty Shots into Giga Bowser!

    Saiyaman: Mr. Destroyer shields against one of Giga Bowser's running attacks, then grabs him, only to have Giga Bowser break free and grab him! Giga Bowser throws Mr. Destroyer downward, crushing him and flinging him upward!

    Axl: Mr. Destroyer lands a bit away from Giga Bowser to avoid another attack, landing on his feet and using his Omega3 Slash! Giga Bowser swipes at him a bit more, but Mr. Destroyer dodges the attacks!

    MD: 138%D1 GB: 41%

    Saiyaman: Giga Bowser seems to be tired of playing around, as he hops up and delivers a Bowser Bomb! Mr. Destroyer can't dodge in time and goes flying up and out of the arena!

    THIS GAME'S WINNER IS...GIGA BOWSER!

    Saiyaman: Sorry about your loss there, Mr. Destroyer.

    Mr. Destroyer: Well, I guess I'll just have to get even better if I want to win next time.

    Saiyaman: That's the spirit. Let's see the blue screen.

    (The blue screen appears again.)

    If you would like to be a contestant on this show, please send an e-mail to Saiyaman with the subject “Contestant” to apply. Please include your name and some basic background information about yourself. Also, a list of B moves for the Battle section is required. You may pick the three opponents you wish to battle. They can be any SSS character you want, including dead ones. However, they can’t be all the same. Also, we have the right to place you against different opponents as we wish. Please note however, that we can’t actually make you a Superpower in any way. This is only for fun and you cannot receive nor donate any actual prizes in any way. Limit of one application per person. Extra applications from the same person will be deleted upon arrival.

    Axl: Well, everyone, this is guest commentator Axl, heading out!

    Saiyaman: So long, everyone!

    Mr. Destroyer: Later.

    (Fade out.)