Who Wants to be a Superpower?

Voice: Welcome to "Who Wants to be a Superpower?", the show that makes SSS' fan community feel that much worse about themselves! Now, here's the man of a thousand jokes - some of them funny - the Great Saiyaman!

(Wahoo, it's the old set.)

Saiyaman: Fortunately, I only share the good ones! Welcome back, all!

Voice: So, how was the last episode? I can't seem to remember it.

Saiyaman: Well, you did fall asleep. I thought self-inflicted hypnosis didn't work.

Voice: I was just tired. I didn't have my coffee that morning.

Saiyaman: Whatever the reason, let's get this episode going, sleep-free, with our contestant, CD128!

(CD128 enters and sits down.)

Saiyaman: Thanks for being on the show, CD128.

CD128: Good to be here.

Voice: So, tell us a little about yourself.

CD128: I do a lot of web surfing, TV watching and web comic reading.

Saiyaman: Sounds like anyone else here. Now, your prize tonight was donated by Peppita Rossetti of the famous Rossetti Troupe. Yes, you can win a copy of her autograph! (holds up a piece of paper covered in scribbles.)

CD128: What the heck?

Voice: Kid needs to work on her handwriting.

Saiyaman: Personally, I think it's cute. Now, let's play "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!

(Ongo-bongo, it's the dimming lights and dramatic music!)

Saiyaman: It's time for Knowledge! All set?

CD128: Absolutely!

Voice: Who was the original 151st Pokemon?

CD128: Mew.

Saiyaman: How can you hear the ocean in a seashell?

CD128: I think it has something to do with the soundwaves of the ocean reflecting inside the shell.

Voice: How old will Bob and George be this year?

CD128: Five years old.

Saiyaman: What's the title of the next Harry Potter book?

CD128: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Voice: Who won this year's Super Bowl?

CD128: Beats me.

Saiyaman: Does this place need dusting?

CD128: Yeah, just a little.

TIME!!

Saiyaman: All right, you've passed to Creativity. Your problem this time is that, in anime-fashion, you've been turned into a girl. What do you do?

CD128: Failing the usage of water, I'd hire someone to change me back. After all, sex change operations are really cheap these days.

Saiyaman: Sounds good. Head off to the arena.

(CD128 leaves for the areana.)

Saiyaman: As usual, the rules are three foes with only two lives and no items. Let's review the moveset.

  • B: Whirlwind: whirls like a tornado with limited control over his movements.
  • B+Up: Teleport: Mewtwo's teleport.
  • B+Right: Home Run Smash: Ness' Smash attack.
  • B+Down: Hailstorm: stones fall from the sky for a second. Hailstones hit for 3%, lightning bolts for 15%.

    Saiyaman: CD128 will be going up against Roy, Ash and Mario this time and his intials will be CD. Since Ash is busy being dead, the arena choice is Graveyard Romp.

    Voice: Actually, I hear Ash is trying to find someway to come back to life. He'll pay anyone who can help.

    Saiyaman: How can he pay? Isn't his bank account void since he died?

    Voice: Hey, there's a sucker born every minute, remember?

    Saiyaman: True. Okay, CD128 is in the arena and it looks like Roy is first up, so let's get started!

    ***Begin Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Ladies and germs...

    Voice: Boys and girls...

    Saiyaman: Elicoorians and Velbaysians...

    Voice: SSS can never stop bringing you...

    Saiyaman: THE SUPER-DUPER SAIYAMAN!

    Voice: CAPTAIN VOICE!

    Both: YOUR SSS COMMENTATORS!

    Saiyaman: Now, for the seventy in attendence...

    Voice: And for the two-hundred fifty-five watching worldwide...

    Saiyaman: IT'S SMASHING TIME!

    ***End Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: The two of them head right off on the attack, meeting on the mid-air right platform! Roy starts off with his rightb, striking three times before CD128 can get back!

    Voice: CD128 pulls off his Whirlwind attack, smacking Roy into the ground! As Roy gets back up, he tries a Smash, but CD128 dodges and throws him!

    Saiyaman: Roy lands on the central platform, striking CD128 with his Blazer attack when he follows! CD128 manages to grab the platform edge and pull himself up, attacking Roy in the process!

    Voice: Roy grabs CD128 and throws him downward, then follows up with an upward Smash! CD128 comes back with an air attack as a lightning bolt strikes the farthest left platform!

    Saiyaman: CD128 follows up with his Home Run Smash, forcing Roy down to the middle platform! CD128 follows after him, dodging his sword slice and punching Roy!

    Voice: Roy shields against a few of CD128's punches and counters with his Counter, knocking CD128 up against the tombstone! CD128 gets back up, only to be sliced by Roy's B!

    CD: 68% Roy: 52%

    Saiyaman: CD128 leaps back onto the tombstone and Roy leaps up after him, throwing another sword slice! CD128 leaps over that attack and strikes Roy with a Meteor Smash!

    Voice: Roy attempts his Blazer, but CD128 shields against the attack and retaliates with his upward Smash! He then leaps up and knocks Roy over to the mid-air right platform!

    Saiyaman: Roy blocks one of CD128's attacks with his Counter, then runs in to strike! CD128 recovers from the Counter and hits with a low Smash!

    Voice: A lightning bolt strikes their platform and both contestants are sent flying! CD128 lands on the mid-air left platform while Roy just barely lands on the right edge platform within bounds!

    Saiyaman: Both combatants run towards each other, meeting on the mid-air right platform! Roy's rightb is dodged and countered with a Home Run Bat, KOing him!

    Voice: With Roy down, Ash has emerged on the righthand side of the arena! CD128 leaps over to take him on, but gets hit on the right mid-air platform by a Poke-Thunder!

    Saiyaman: Ash leaps over to CD128 and starts punching him, but CD128 grabs him and throws him into the ground! He follows that one up with a Smash attack!

    Voice: CD128 goes into a Whirlwind, but Ash manages to roll out of the way! Ash hits with his Pokefire move and smacks him with a running attack!

    Saiyaman: CD128 whips out his Hailstorm move, succeding in hitting Ash with two hailstones! Ash begins to punch CD128, but CD128 ducks and hits with a low Smash!

    Voice: Ash is knocked to the middle platform with CD128 leaping after him, but a lightning bolt strikes the platform! CD128 manages to double-jump away from the bolt, but Ash is shocked and leaps to the left mid-air platform!

    Saiyaman: CD128 leaps back onto the right mid-air platform, then leaps towards Ash again! Ash leaps up and the two of them smack each other in mid-air, landing on the middle platform and getting shocked!

    CD: 127% Ash: 38%

    Voice: Both of them manage to land on the mid-air left platform, but CD128 hits with his Whirlwind as they land! Ash gets back up, only to receive a good hard smack!

    Saiyaman: Ash grabs CD128, hits him once, then throws him straight into the air! He leaps up, smacks CD128 and it results into a Voice: CD128 returns on the revival platform, using Teleport to reappear behind Ash and use a quick Smash attack! Ash turns around and uses his Pokefire, which CD128 shields against!

    Saiyaman: As CD128's invincibility wears off, Ash hits him with his Smash attack! CD128 is pushed back, but comes back by slamming Ash with his running attack!

    Voice: CD128 slips on the slick surface, allowing Ash time to hurl himself at CD128 using Pokethunder, but CD128 manages to leap over the attack and mid-air attack! Ash falls onto the central platform followed by CD128!

    Saiyaman: Ash lands safely and hits CD128 with an upward attack! CD128 falls to the platform and begins to punch Ash, getting in several hits before Ash throws him off the ledge!

    Voice: CD128 manages to leap back onto the far left platform, but Ash already sent a Pokethunder after him! CD128 shields against the Pokethunder and taunts Ash, luring him over!

    Saiyaman: Ash heads over via the mid-air left platform as CD128 uses his Hailstorm, striking with three hailstones! Ash manages to make it to the left platform and tries a aerial attack, but CD128 dodges!

    CD: 25%D1 Ash: 94%

    Voice: Ash manages to give CD128 a low attack with CD128 retaliating by grabbing him! With one good throw, he goes off the left edge of the arena and is Saiyaman: That just leaves Mario, who hops into the arena on the right hand side! The two combatants head towards each other, arriving at the central platform!

    Voice: Mario pulls out his Mario Tornado, striking CD128 before knocking him down! CD128 gets back and retaliates by grabbing and throwing Mario into the tombstone!

    Saiyaman: Mario uses one of his classic Fireballs, but CD128 leaps over first and his with a mid-air attack! Mario counters with his Super Jump Punch with CD128 leaping onto the mid-air left platform after he hits!

    Voice: Mario heads up after CD128, whipping with his Cape attack! CD128 manages to dodge the attack and uses his Home Run Smash!

    Saiyaman: Mario dashes and connects with a running attack, then follows up with an upward-Smash! CD128 goes up, but lands on the central platform and uses his Hailstorm attack, hitting three times with hailstones!

    Voice: Mario drops down onto the central platform, but CD128 is waiting with his Home Run Smash, knocking Mario over the pit! Mario leaps to the other side of the pit and leaps back onto the left mid-air platform!

    Saiyaman: CD128 hops up there and dodges a Cape attack, then hits with a Smash attack! Mario whirls in with his Mario Tornado and tries a Super Jump Punch, but CD128 leans out of its way!

    Voice: CD128 comes down with a Meteor Smash, causing some heavy damage! Mario follows up with a Fireball, then throws CD128!

    CD: 73%D1 M: 61%

    Saiyaman: CD128 falls back to the central platform, but this time, he heads onto the mid-air right platform! Mario follows and oddges CD128's upward-Smash!

    Voice: CD128 goes into his Whirlwind attack, managing to knock Mario to the ground! Mario's back up and uses his Cape attack, which hits!

    Saiyaman: Mario attempts a quick Smash, but CD128 leaps up and kicks him! He then grabs Mario and tosses him into the air, leaping up to hit him!

    Voice: Mario hits CD128 instead, but both combatants land back on the mid-air right platform! CD128 uses the time to hit Mario with a Smash, sending Mario to the far right platform!

    Saiyaman: CD128 leaps over to the platform just as Mario gets back up to grab and throw him! So close to the edge, it's a KO!

    THIS GAME'S WINNER IS...CD128!

    CD128: Yeah, that was great!

    Saiyaman: As if it wouldn't. Let's view that blue screen.

    (The blue screen appears.)

    If you would like to be a contestant on this show, please send an e-mail to Saiyaman with the subject “Contestant” to apply. Please include your name and some basic background information about yourself. Also, a list of B moves for the Battle section is required. You may pick the three opponents you wish to battle. They can be any SSS character you want, including dead ones. However, they can’t be all the same. Also, we have the right to place you against different opponents as we wish. Please note however, that we can’t actually make you a Superpower in any way. This is only for fun and you cannot receive nor donate any actual prizes in any way. Limit of one application per person. Extra applications from the same person will be deleted upon arrival.

    Voice: Well everyone, this is the Voice, hoping you have champagine wishes and caviar dreams.

    Saiyaman: Later, everyone!

    CD128: Catch you all later!