Who Wants to be a Superpower?

Voice: Welcome to "Who Wants to be a Superpower?", the show where we invest in the practice of budget-cutting! Now, here's your host, the only man who isn't forced to watch talk shows with his wife, the Great Saiyaman!

(Saiyaman walks out and sits down.)

Saiyaman: Welcome back to the show, everybody! Tonight, we have a very special guest for you!

Voice: Gary Coleman?

Saiyaman: Even better! Please welcome from the Kingdom Hearts series, Sora!

(Absolutely huge applause is heard as Sora steps onto the stage and sits down.)

Saiyaman: It's a real pleasure to have you here, Sora.

Sora: It's nice to be here too.

Voice: I don't think we really need to tell the audience about you. I think most people know who you are by now.

Sora: Yeah, I have to agree with you on that.

Saiyaman: That's a time saver. For your prize today, we present you with this handy fangirl repellent, which will temporarily cause fangirls to keep from mobbing you!

Sora: Will it work on fanboys?

Saiyaman: No, you'll need a different repellent for that.

Sora: Crud.

Saiyaman: Well, it's a start. So, you know how to play?

Sora: I think so. I have to answer your questions and do some fighting, right?

Saiyaman: Right, so it's time to play "Who Wants to be a Superpower?"!

(The lights dim as ice cream truck music plays.)

Saiyaman: As usual, we begin with Knowledge! Ready?

Sora: Okay!

Voice: How many Earthworm Jim games have there been?

Sora: Four.

Saiyaman: What is Tron Bonne's SSS font color?

Sora: Uh, fuschia.

Voice: when did the Cretacious period end?

Sora: 65 million years ago.

Saiyaman: How many floors are there in Castle Oblivion?

Sora: I dunno, I've never been there. Wait, have I?

Voice: Where did the Star Rod we use here come from?

Sora: Kirby's Adventure.

Saiyaman: Who's the main character of the Death Note anime?

Sora: Light Yagami.

TIME!!!

Saiyaman: It's time to move on to Creativity. For this challenge, can you give us an way to end the gas crisis.

Sora: That's easy. People can build gummi ships to ride.

Voice: How is that better?

Sora: You can make them anything you want, they can go pretty much anywhere and they run on...something other than gas. I never really found out what.

Saiyaman: We should look into that. So, head into the arena.

(Sora leaves for the arena.)

Saiyaman: Even celeberites like Sora must follow our rules: two lives against three foes. Here's the moveset.

  • B: Sonic Blade - A fast charging attack that brings Sora within range of an opponent.
  • B Up: Aerial Dodge - Essentially, a spinning double jump. Deflects projectiles while spinning.
  • B Side: Strike Raid - Sora throws his keyblade like a boomerang, leaving him open but hitting enemies from afar.
  • B Down: Reflect - Defensive shield spell. Stuns close-range attackers.

    Saiyaman: Sora will be fighting against Ray MkII, Link and Knight and his initials are So. The arena shall be Final Destination. Now that Sora and Ray have entered the arena, it's time to get start!

    ***Begin Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Ladies and gentlemen...

    Voice: Boys and girls...

    Saiyaman: Unicorns and spaghetti...

    Voice: SSS is investing in real estate to afford to replace...

    Saiyaman: THE LOVEABLE SAIYAMAN!

    Voice: THE FANTASTIC VOICE!

    Both: YOUR SSS COMMENTATORS!

    Saiyaman: Now, for the two-hundred fifty five in attendance...

    Voice: And for the sixty-five thousand, five hundred thirty five watching world-wide...

    Saiyaman: IT'S SMASHING TIME!

    ***End Corny Intro***

    Saiyaman: Sora starts things off with Strike Raid, causing Ray to leap forward and over it to deliver the first blow! Sora is quick to retaliate with a few strikes of his own, though!

    Voice: Ray pulls out a low attack to throw Sora off balance, grabs him and throws him! Sora lands on his feet and hits the approaching Ray with Sonic Blade!

    Saiyaman: Following up with a combo, Sora finishes with a Smash, knocking Ray to the left! Ray lands on his feet, dodging a Strike Raid and retaliating with a Wasupunibara!

    Voice: Ray tries another Wasupunibara, but Sora uses Reflect to neutralize the move. Ray moves in for his next move and hits with a running attack!

    Saiyaman: Ray grabs Sora and smacks him into the ground. He tries for a combo with Keikangajakus, but Sora is able to get up and dodge before he releases them, allowing Sora to get in a few hits!

    Voice: Ray is able to get in a upward Smash, knocking Sora into the air! He leaps up to combo with another blow, but Sora dodges with Aerial Dodge, landing safely towards the right edge!

    So: 46% Ry: 37%

    Saiyaman: Sora starts to approach the landing Ray, who fires off a Fukanimisairu that Sora dodges! Sora then moves in for a Smash attack and knocks Ray towards the left edge of the arena!

    Voice: Ray manages to land on his feet and uses a Smash at the approaching Sora, who leaps over it! Sora smacks Ray from above and then grabs him when he hits the ground!

    Saiyaman: Sora gives Ray three smacks before tossing him into the air! Sora then hits with an upward Smash as Ray comes down, but not before Ray releases some Keikangajakus which then hit Sora!

    Voice: Ray lands while Sora is stunned by the Keikangajakus and goes in for a running attack! Sora beats him at his own game and smacks him first with Sonic Blade!

    Saiyaman: Ray tries a low Smash, but Sora uses Reflect to stun him before he can attack! Sora then uses the stun time to power up a Smash and hit Ray with it!

    Voice: The blow sends Ray flying to the left and over the edge, but his Kamikaze technique brings him back! Sora finds himself dashing away to the arena's center to avoid the explosion.

    Saiyaman: Sora heads back after the explosion clears, smacking Ray with a running attack! Ray grabs Sora and throws him into the ground!

    Voice: Sora gets back up quickly and rolls away from Ray's low Smash follow-up, then hits with his own Smash! The extra damage from Kamikaze sends Ray flying for a KO!

    Saiyaman: Now, Link comes into the arena, but Sora's ready for him, using a Sonic Blade to score the first hit! Link is fast on his feet, though, and strikes back with an arrow shot!

    Voice: Link follows up with a Boomerang hit before Sora can close in and goes in for a running attack! Sora is able to neutralize the attack with his own attack and follows up with some more strikes!

    Saiyaman: Link breaks out of Sora's attacking with a Spin Attack, knocking Sora back! Link tries to follow with a Bomb, only to have Sora roll back from the move!

    Voice: Sora heads back towards Link, leaping over an arrow along the way and dropping on him with an aireal attack! Link uses this to grab Sora and starts hitting him!

    Saiyaman: Link tosses Sora into the ground, steps back and throws a Bomb at him! Sora shields and blocks the bomb and strikes back with Strike Raid!

    : So 101% L: 43%

    Voice: Sora moves in for the next blow, but Link intercepts him on the way with his Hookshot! Link hits once before Sora breaks free, with Link using a Spin Attack and Sora blocking with Reflect!

    Saiyaman: Link ends up being stunned, so Sora gets in a few smacks before Link recovers! Sora tries a Smash, but Link shields against it and starts jabbing Sora back!

    Voice: Sora manages to grab Link and tosses him to the right, only sending him a short distance. Sora attempts to use this to combo by tossing out a Strike Raid that Link shields against.

    Saiyaman: Sora runs over and swings a running attack, but Link jumps over him and hits with a Smash attack! Sora flies over the edge of the arena, but juuuuust makes it back with a Aireal Dodge!

    Voice: Link stays back from the ledge to avoid an attack from Sora and slices again, but Sora rolls under the strike! That brings him close enough to begin smacking Link again, but Link cuts this short with a grab!

    Saiyaman: Link flings Sora back towards the ledge, with Sora using a double-jump to get back and land on the edge! Link uses a Smash attack to smack Sora again, KOing him!

    Voice: Sora comes back on the revival platform as Link prepares for the tradiational fleeing from the invincible foe. Link tries to jump over Sora as he moves in close, but Sora leaps up and smacks him in mid-air!

    Saiyaman: Link falls down to the ground with Sora smacking him with a Smash when he hits the ground! Link ends up too far to the edge and gets KOed!

    Voice: Finally, this leads to the entrance of Knight, who starts off with a low Smash! Sora manages to leap to avoid it, flying over Knight and hits Knight on the way down!

    Saiyaman: Knight uses a Blitz Blade to stun Sora and follows up with a combo! That combo ends with a Smash attack, sending Sora to the left!

    Voice: Sora manages to lands safely and shields himself from Knight's Screaming Blast! Knight then charges forward with a Sapphire Spike, which slices into Sora when he drops the shield!

    Saiyaman: Sora doesn't take this lightly, hitting Knight with an upward Smash as he comes down! Knight manages to land on his feet and jabs at Sora, who shields against the attacks.

    So: 45%D1 Kn: 18%

    Voice: Knight stops his attacks for a second, causing Sora to drop the shield to attack! Knight is a hair faster though and hits Sora first!

    Saiyaman: Sora dodges Knight's follow-up attack and grabs him, tossing him into the ground! Knight bounces and gets back up, so Sora begins hitting him again before he can attack!

    Voice: Knight blocks and rolls back, then uses a close-range Blitz Blade to stun Sora for a moment! That moment is used to prepare a Smash attack, sending Sora towards the arena's center!

    Saiyaman: Knight moves in close and tries to finish Sora off with a Paradox Equation, but Sora runs out of range of the explosion and hits with Strike Raid! Knight heads back towards Sora with Sapphire Strike, but Sora is just out his attack range.

    Voice: Sora is quick to counter-attack Knight, using a running attack followed by a quick Smash! Knight lands on his feet and narrowly dodges another running attack!

    Saiyaman: Knight goes for another attack, to which Sora evades and strikes back with a Smash! Knight winds up over on the left side of the arena and tosses a Blitz Blade, which Sora deflects while heading over with Aireal Dodge!

    Voice: Knight ducks his reflected attack and grabs Sora when the two get close enough with each other. Sora is heaved over the edge, but he uses a double-jump and mid-air dodge to avoid Knight's attempt to knock him farther!

    Saiyaman: In a bit of turnabout, Sora now grabs Knight and tosses him over the edge! Knight is able to get back with a Sapphire Strike, which Sora shields against.

    Voice: Sora stuns Knight with a Reflect and hits again with a Smash, this one being charged a bit beforehand! It's enought to send Knight for a KO!

    THIS GAME'S WINNER IS...SORA!

    Sora: All right!

    Saiyaman: I think the fans would've lynched us if he'd lost. Let's go to the blue screen.

    (The blue screen pops up.)

    If you would like to be a contestant on this show, please send an e-mail to Saiyaman with the subject “Contestant” to apply. Please include your name and some basic background information about yourself. Also, a list of B moves for the Battle section is required. You may pick the three opponents you wish to battle. They can be any SSS character you want, including dead ones. However, they can’t be all the same. Also, we have the right to place you against different opponents as we wish. Please note however, that we can’t actually make you a Superpower in any way. This is only for fun and you cannot receive nor donate any actual prizes in any way. Limit of one application per person. Extra applications from the same person will be deleted upon arrival.

    Voice: Well, folks, this is the Voice hoping you're all happy, since Sora will probably never be here again.

    Saiyaman: So long, folks.

    Sora: Bye. Wait, what was that?

    (Fade out.)