Season 4
Match #104

Triforce Battle I

The Fighters:

Link	Bowser

The Arena: Final Destination
Items: None

Digi: Welcome everyone to this first-round match of the Triforce Tournament! I gotta tell you this, after the SSS Country has heard the news about this tournament, they have almost gone crazy about this just to see who's going to take this shiny sucker! Anyways, before we move on, I'd like to bring a special...guest.

Crowd: (oohs)

Digi: This is not an SSS fighter, SP, or Meleenium friend of mine...well, actually, kinda. I have had the great pleasure of meeting him and even got into a fight with him once. Fans, you know you want to chant it. Here he is, the one and only, JERRY SPRINGER!

(Springer appears, and of course, this can only mean one thing...)

Crowd: JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Oh boy...Jerry's in the booth.

Jerry: Oh man, what a nice day it is here. Thanks for inviting me on, Digi.

Digi: Hey, no problem. Judging by how often you see fighting break out on the show, this should be a piece of cake.

Jerry: Yeah, full out fighting, but without Steve there, I dunno.

Digi: Enough with the show stuff. We have a match.

Jerry: Right. Well, welcome! Our guests today say that--okay, fine. Our fighters tonight...ladies and gentlemen, a group of Miyamoto fighters looking at great motives to win the Triforce of Power! One of wants it to protect it, and one of them wants to one-up his archrival villain! Respectively, here are Link and Bowser!

Digi: Heh...this is gonna be sad for me...

Jerry: Why?

Digi: Both have been invited to be guest commentators in matches I've hosted before, so I'm kinda buddies with them both...

Jerry: Oh. Well, that happens.

Digi: Alright...So, in the fairest of fights, they are willing to scuffle at the Final Destination in a two-life bout. Basic enough, isn't it?

Jerry: Yeah, but wait till Bowser tells Link he's been sleeping with Zelda...

(Crowd laughs, eventually breaking into moderate cheers)

Digi: Oh, you shush! Just reminding you of the show, huh?

Jerry: I guess so. Well, anyways, it's time to roll.

Digi: Sure thing, Jerry! Ladies, gentlemen, and creatures of SSS Country, we are here to present this first-round match of the Smash Stadium Triforce Tournament!

Jerry: And for all those who are looking for a little rumble...

Digi and Jerry: WHO LET THE FIGHTERS OUT? WE DID!

Jerry: And they're off! Link on stage right, Bowser stage left...and Link starts off with the grab.

Digi: Oh yeah, he's given Bowser a forwards toss, but King Koopa retaliates with some flames and an upward smash! They're already off towards the edge!

Jerry: Wow! Bowser is coming hard off the gates.

Digi: But Link tries not to be outdone as he fires a boomerang shot and a couple quick stabs, and retreats towards the center of the arena.

Bowser: PANSY! Get back over here!

Jerry: And Link is not listening. He pulls a bomb, starts to run, and oh--he tosses it in Bowser's face while he gave chase to the swordsman!

Digi: Now it's Bowser's turn to do something. He runs towards Link as he tries to pull that sword on him but it's too late! The Koopa Klaw snatches him and Link takes a licking!

Jerry: Link grabs Bowser back, and they're throwing punches on the floor!

Crowd: JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Digi: Figures.

Jerry: Back to the fight. Link goes back a few steps and smashes in with the sword! Bowser jumps once back and then shields himself for the next blow!

Digi: Some good defense executed as Bowser comes out of hiding and gives Link another fresh round of flame throwing...

Jerry: So that means Bowser was...never mind.

Digi: I swear, one more show reference during the match that doesn't include the audience and the ejector seat will fling.

Home away from home, there, Springer?

Jerry: Alright, alright. Meanwhile, Link looks around for some relief, but can't find any! He looks at Bowser, rushes him, but Bowser leaps...and it's the Bowser Bomb! Link has nowhere to go!

Jerry: Not surprised to see Bowser winning, but Link isn't that willing to give in. He pulls another bomb, willing to take the close range hit, and does so. Now he's, oh here we go. Link continues his revenge with an upward smash and a huge drill kick from above!

Digi: But Bowser...oh, that hulk just Bombed Link upwards, though not quite dead. That will hurt when he lands!

Jerry: Bowser just waiting for the moment to strike...Link rolls off to the side and tries to Hookshot him in, but misses! King Koopa ready to use that crucial opportunity! He rushes in with that Klaw, and takes a couple bites! He sends him on his way, and Link is down a life!

Digi: And I bet Link is real mad now! He returns and just glares down Bowser and with a couple swings of the sword, he's gotten in on some needed blows! Bowser, however, doesn't want any of it! He retaliates with a couple of smashing blows.

Jerry: It's back to close-combat range now as Link stabs Bowser right in the stomach! He takes the op to charge a smash, and he sends him off the platform...is it enough? Not quite! Bowser makes it back on the Whirling Fortress!

Bowser: I'm not dead yet--oh wait, I can't finish it without getting bleeped...

Digi: Stop it with the Richard Pryor now, Bowser. This is not supposed to be a Parker/Stone collaboration.

Jerry: But Bowser is not going to lose his life yet. He sets up Link by faking a Bomb, only to whip him around with that Whirling Fortress!

Digi: However, Link is able to stay alive for now, and he's gonna rush in! He sends a fast kick off Bowser and this could do him in! It does! Back to square one for their last life apiece...

Crowd: JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!

Jerry: THIS ISN'T THE SHOW! Geez...can't these people--oh, here's something. Bowser wants to end it! He's going in with the Koopa Klaw and tosses the swordsman off to the side! He heads back to the opposite end and taunts for good measure.

Digi: He's just leaving Link out to dry...relatively dominating the match so far...Link tries to come back with a Boomerang and manages a hit, but Bowser misses a toss of one of Link's bombs shortly afterwards...

Jerry: Link, though, is not willing to lose this one yet! He makes a couple jumps, and gives Bowser a hard downward stab but gets caught in the fray. Bowser Whirls him off to the edge of stage left!

Digi: Link is in desperation mode now...practically needs a miracle to win this one...he's able to land in a couple of quick sword shots, but Bowser punches him right upside the head!

Jerry: Bowser gives Link an upward smash! Will it be enough? No, not yet...Link slams into the ground, but gets back up, but the Koopa is already towering over him, and this looks like it! A Bowser Bomb Link barely gets hits by sends him over!

Digi: The jump is a bit short...will the Sword Spin get him back? It doesn't!

Digi and Jerry: AND THAT IS THE MATCH!

THIS GAME'S WINNER IS...BOWSER!

Post-Match:

Jerry: I'm gonna get to Link, alright? You take Bowser.

Digi: I've commentated with Bowser and sometimes he can get a bit crazy, but sure...

Jerry: Hey, Bowser?

Bowser: Yeah, Dr. Phil?

Bowser's being himself again...

Digi: Here we go again...

Bowser: I heard that!

Jerry: So, you're moving onto the quarters in this tournament...anything you'd like to say?

Bowser: Well, I tell you what, Oprah! That Link chose a bad day to bring out his A-fight, cause I sure showed him around...and everyone else better look out! BWAHAHAHA!

Jerry: Well, have a good rest up for the next round, and good luck, alright!

Bowser: YEAH!

Digi: Hang on a second...Link, you there?

(No answer)

Digi: Link, what do you feel about the match?

(After trying again, there's no answer!)

Digi: Ack, he's not saying anything! After that match, I bet he did...oh well, I'll make sure to get across to him ASAP...

Jerry: Hey, sometimes, people just don't want to be interviewed or anything. Happens a lot.

Digi: Yeah, it does. Now here are the questions!

Jerry: But what about the Final Thought?

Digi: Are you the one hosting this match, or me?

Jerry: (sighs) Alright, alright...

Digi: Nah, nah, nah, it's okay. Right after the questions!

1. Is Bowser going to dominate his way to the finals?
2. Will Link make up that interview sometime?
3. Who stands the best chance on Bowser, period?
4. Will the audience stop making Springer Show references as long as he might be an occasional guest commentator?

Digi: We'll see...okay, Jerry, you're good to go.

Does it really have to be said?

Jerry: Alright. I'd like to thank Digifanatic for giving me the opportunity to bring me out here today. I had a real good time watching some real fighting and not just the "You slept with my wife!" sort of deals. You know, after seeing this, I've always wondered what makes people really want to fight each other. Is it to prove a point? Is it to brag on others? Is it the glory? Well, with what I've heard about the Triforce being offered, it could easily be any of those and yet none of those at the same time. We came in here looking for a good fight and a lot of fun, and I certainly agree to all of that. Link may be carrying out a grudge on Bowser--after all, he's had the realm advantage with the Triforce being at stake--but I'm sure that in the end, everything will be settled.

Digi: Hey, that was pretty good.

Jerry: Thanks.

Digi: Well, on behalf of everyone at SSS, we're out of here! Remember folks, take care of yourself and--

Jerry: Hey, that's my line!

Digi: Anyways, we're outta here!