Match #105

The Question: Who's the NEW cutest fighter?

The Fighters: Kirby vs.Pichu vs. Ice Climbers
The Arena: Fountain of Dreams
Item Ratio: Low
Lives: Two

Saiyaman: Hi there, ladies and gentlemen! Are you ready for another match?

Audience: Uh...maybe?

Amber: Sure you are! We've got an interesting one for you tonight. Where's that backstory tape?

Saiyaman: Got it right here. (pops in the tape.)

(On the tape, we see Quinn Mallory leaping through the wormhole into another dimension.)

Amber: Oh, I forgot I used this tape to record an episode of Sliders.

Saiyaman: Darn it. I hope we don't have to go back to the plushies. (fast-forwards and finds the backstory, where we see Pikachu and Pichu conversing.)

Pikachu: Chu, pika pikachu chu pika chu pika pika.(You know, I've heard people saying recently that you're even cuter than me.)

Pichu: Pi? Pichu pi! Pichu pi chu pi! (Really? Wow, that's neat! I could be the cutest one here!)

Pikachu: Pika. Chu chu pika chu pikachu pika chu pikachu pika pikachu chu pika chu.(I dunno. We once decided that the cutest is Kirby and I don't think he'll give up that title without a fight.)

Pichu: Pi. Pichu chu pi pi chu pichu? (Oh. Does this mean I'll have to fight Kirby for the title?)

Pikachu: Pika. (Probably.)

Pichu: Chu, pi pichu chu! (Okay, I'll give it a try!)

(Slightly later, at the locker rooms...)

Nana: Did you hear? Pichu wants to fight Kirby for the title of cutest fighter!

Popo: What? I thought we were the cutest ones here now! Let's get in that match and prove we're super-cute too!

Nana: All right!

(The tape ends.)

Saiyaman: So, we've got a three-way fight. The fighters have two lives each and the item ratio is low. Our arena is the Fountain of Dreams.

Amber: Huh? I thought Ray blew it up.

Saiyaman: Fortunately, our trained repair crew had it fixed up in no time. Let's take a look.

(We see 175 putting the final touches on the arena.)

Amber: Hey, where's our trained repair crew?

175: They formed a union and went on strike. I'm the best you could get on short notice to finish up before the match.

(Outside the Stadium...)

Foreman Spike: What do we want?


Foreman Spike: When do we want it?

Crew Members: WHEN WE'RE HUNGRY!

(Back in the Stadium...)

Saiyaman: So, what are you using to fix the arena there?

175: Just the handyman's secret weapon. (holds up some duct tape.) It's just until the cement gets here. I should leave now, shouldn't I?

Amber: Yeah, the fighters are coming in as we speak.

175: Whoops! (leaves as the fighters arrive.)

Saiyaman: Okay, let's get started! Ladies and germs...

Amber: Boys and girls...

Saiyaman: All other ridiculously cute beings we don't have time to mention...

Amber: SSS is spending absolutely nothing to bring you...




Saiyaman: And now, for the twenty-thousand in attendance...

Amber: And for the fourty-thousand watching worldwide...


Amber: Pichu and the Ice Climbers quickly go at each other, Pichu taking an early strike with Skull Bash! Kirby, meanwhile, hasn't moved for some unknown reason.

Kirby: (pulls his foot up.) Finally! Darn loose duct tape strands. (smoothes it into place.)

Saiyaman: That was nice of him. Meanwhile, the Ice Climbers catch Pichu up in a Blizzard attack followed by Squall Hammer! Kirby comes up and runs through them both with a running attack!

Amber: Kirby winds up a Hammer attack, but Nana interupts that with a regular smack while Popo hits Pichu with an upward Smash! Pichu comes back down on him with a Thunder Jolt and a throw to the left!

Saiyaman: Nana heads over and rejoins Popo, smacking through Pichu with a running attack as she does so! Kirby then gets Pichu with several quick blows and a Final Cutter attack!

Amber: Now rejoined, the Ice Climbers unless a dual Ice Shot attack on poor Pichu and double-Smash him! Pichu goes flying to the right as Kirby Swallows Popo for his ability!

Saiyaman: Pichu returns to the battlefield with a Quick Attack as Kirby is hit by Popo's downward air attack! Seeing an opportunity, Pichu sneaks up behind Popo and hits him and Kirby with a Smash attack!

Amber: Both fighters land on the left platform as Pichu hops up after them, unleashing a Thunder attack as he goes past them! Kirby shields against the attack, but the Ice Climbers are hit before they can dodge!

Saiyaman: As soon as Pichu lands, Kirby hits him with the Ice Climbers' Ice Shot move, but the Ice Climbers wham through both of them with Squall Hammer! The move sends them off the platform where Pichu hits them both with a low Smash!

Pi: 67% K: 41% IC: 45%

Amber: Both Kirby and the Ice Climbers go over the edge of the arena, but Kirby floats back as the Ice Climbers use Belay! As he returns, Kirby comes down on the Ice Climbers with Stone!

Saiyaman: Pichu grabs the stone-formed Kirby and slams him into the ground as the Ice Climbers smack Kirby and Pichu as they descend from Kirby's prior attack! Kirby leans his way to the right as the Ice Climbers throw Pichu off the edge!

Amber: Pichu tries to come back, but the Ice Climbers smash him away for a KO! As they do that, Kirby comes up behind them with a Hammer and knocks them off the edge as well!

Saiyaman: Pichu returns on the platform and makes a beeline for Kirby as the Ice Climbers use Belay to return again! Kirby prepares to attack again, but is interrupted by an Skull Bash from Pichu!

Amber: (throws in a Fan near Pichu.) Pichu has the Fan and begins a furious assult on Kirby with it, but the Ice Climbers go over him and avoid it! Pichu tries a Thunder attack on them, leaving him open to a Hammer from Kirby!

Saiyaman: The Ice Climbers evaded the aforementioned Thunder and hop down to beat on the other fighers with Squall Hammer! Left close to the edge again, they try to escape, only Popo does, as Kirby's Smash attack KOs Nana!

Amber: With his offensive power in half, Popo tries to retreat for a bit, only to have Pichu hop up and block him! Pichu KOs Popo with an upward Smash, followed by Kirby hitting him with Final Cutter!

Saiyaman: Both of the Ice Climbers return to the arena now and swing their hammers for an attack at the other fighters! Pichu dodges and Kirby shields, nullifying the attack!

Amber: The Ice Climbers are vunerable again, so Kirby launches some rapid punches as Pichu attacks from above! There are no favorites here, as when Pichu lands, Kirby hits him with a low Smash!

Pi: 36%D1 K: 108% IC: 12%D1

Saiyaman: Kirby attacks again with Ice Shot, but the Ice Climbers smash it out of him, not to mention hit Pichu! Pichu returns and hits with a strong Skull Bash while Kirby just barely makes it back with Final Cutter!

Amber: Pichu hits the Ice Climbers with a thrown Fan and dashes underneath while they're flying, as does Kirby! The Ice Climbers land on the left platform and throw an Ice Shot, to which the other fighters leap over!

Saiyaman: As they do that, Kirby uses the leap to hit Pichu with a Hammer attack! Pichu hits Kirby with a midair attack and throws him once they hit ground level as the Ice Climbers rush in!

Amber: The Ice Climbers strike Pichu with a Blizzard as Kirby floats back in again after being thrown! Pichu leaps in and delivers a quick Smash to Kirby, finally KOing him!

Saiyaman: The Ice Climbers use a few basic smacks against Pichu and continue their attack with a Squall Hammer! Kirby returns on the revival platform, drops behind the Ice Climbers and hit with an upward Smash!

Amber: Pichu attacks Kirby with a Thunderjolt, but misses as Kirby hops up to kick the Ice Climbers! The Ice Climbers shield against Kirby's blow and counter with a strong hammer smack!

Saiyaman: As Kirby falls, Pichu powers up a Skull Bash and unleashes it on Kirby as he hits the ground level! Kirby doesn't go very far, allowing Kirby to Swallow him up, but not copy his power!

Amber: That's because the Ice Climbers have dropped to attack, but Kirby hit them first with a Pichu projectile! Popo turns and Smashes Kirby while Nana does that to Pichu!

Saiyaman: Kirby lands just in front of the right edge of the arena while Pichu goes flying over the left edge! He returns with Quick Attack as Kirby Swallows Popo once again for his power!

Pi: 94%D1 K: 51%D1 IC: 44%D1

Amber: (hits a button.) A Monitor popped up on the central platform and Pichu gets there first with his Quick Attack! He opens it to reveal a Freezie, a Home Run Bat and a Metal Box, the second of which Pichu grabs!

Saiyaman: The Ice Climbers grabs the Freezie as it drops down and hold onto it as they hop up and use Squall Hammer on Pichu! As they happens, they also snag the Metal Box, turning Popo to metal!

Amber: The Ice Climbers smack Pichu with the Freezie, freezing him solid! The height it knocked him from the attack sends him over the top and out of the match! Poor guy.

Saiyaman: I take you wanted him to win?

Amber: I thought he was the cutest.

Saiyaman: Kirby leaps up to their level with Final Cutter and throws a few punches before the Ice Climbers grab him! They smack Kirby twice before throwing him up and dodging the subsequent Stone attack!

Amber: Kirby follows them downward to ground level and piledrives Popo with his throw! Popo is back on his feet as the two Ice Climbers swing at Kirby with a running attack, only to have Kirby leap and attack from above!

Saiyaman: Kirby launches a Smash attack against them as the Metal Box wears off, then swings his Hammer! Popo goes off the edge, but returns with Belay just in time to get another Smash attack! He can't jump back and gets KOed!


(Afterwards, in the locker rooms...)

Kirby: Hey, guys, good fight. No hard feelings, right?

Popo: Yeah, I guess so.

Nana: No hard feelings.

Pichu: Chu. Pi pichu chu pi chu pichu. (Okay. I guess we're all cute in our own way.)

(Later, in the lounge area...)

Saiyaman: You seriously think Pichu is cuter than Kirby?

Amber: Totally! He should've won that by a-...

175: (walks over to them.) Hey, guys, glad you're here. I need to talk to you about something.

Saiyaman: This isn't like your plan for the perfect murder, is it?

175: Hey, if I had got the 9-iron, a spare tire and Alex Trebec to help, it could've worked, but that's not the issue. Now, you know that mysterious guy who showed up to heal contestants during a few matches, Dr. Mario?

Saiyaman: Yeah, what about him?

175: I've done some research and I believe that Dr. Mario may actually be... (looks around.) ...Mario.

Amber: Uh-huh. What makes you say that?

175: First off, Mario and Dr. Mario have never been seen together at the same time. Secondly, the names are too simular to be a coincidence.

Saiyaman: Are you sure on that? It's not like the name is copyrighted.

175: Thirdly, take a look at these photos. (pulls out several photos.) As you can see, there's an undenyable resemblence between Mario and-...

Amber: Actor Kevin Sorbo?

175: (looks at the picture.) How'd that get there? (sees Navi.) Here, Navi, have a photo. (hands it to her.)

Navi: What's this? (looks at the photo.) Oooh, he's a hunk! Thanks. (walks off.)

175: Now, as I was saying, note the undenyable resemblence between Mario and Dr. Mario.

Saiyaman: True, but it could always be someone impersonating Mario to keep his identity secret.

175: No, it must be Mario! I'd bet money on it!

Saiyaman: Really? Care for a friendly wager then?

175: Okay then, if Dr. Mario isn't really Mario...I'll buy pizza for all the SPs!

Saiyaman: And if he is?

175: Then you...have to make me an SP for a week!

Saiyaman: I'll take that bet!

175: You're on! You can go tell the other SPs while I search for clues. (heads off.)

Amber: I guess all we have left are the questions.

  • 1. Is Pichu really cuter than Kirby?
  • 2. Is duct tape that safe for arena building?
  • 3. Will 175 find evidence linking Mario and Dr. Mario?
  • 4. Is concession stand food worth forming a union over?

    Saiyaman: So, any idea what happened with the union?

    Amber: Last I heard, we caved in and gave them 50% off the regular price.

    Saiyaman: A small price to pay to keep our arenas from falling apart, I suppose.