Match #109: Mario vs. Marth

The Question: Who will win the next round of the Triforce Tournament?

The Fighters for Hyrule Temple

Mario	Marth

Link: Hello... Welcome to the Super Smash Stadium.

Megaman: The superpowers have decided to have Link and I commentate the next match of the Triforce Tournament.

Link: I theorize that they're jerks.

Megaman: There's actually four comentators today. Lets take a look at the list.

Link: Our next commentator is... Zelda?!?

Zelda: That would be correct, Link.

Link: (Voice thick with sarcasm) Yay...

Megaman: And the other commentator is... Link!

Link: Uh... yeah, we know.

Megaman: No, take a look at this...

Link: Link, Megaman, Zelda, and Link... That's...

Young Link: Hi! Are you guys ready?

Adult Link: Oh, hey, Kid.

Y. Link: Hi.

Megaman: You're both Link?

Zelda: I'm fairly certain we've gone over this before...

A. Link: This is going to get confusing... From now on, you're Junior.

Y. Link: Junior? What! No way! I'm Link!

A. Link: I'm Link!

Y. Link: I'm Link!

Zelda: How about this... The small one can be Link, and the big one can be Backstabbing Jerk?

A. Link: You're one to talk! I spent years helping you, and you pushed me away!

Zelda: Did you ever think that maybe you were coming on a bit strong? (Mimicking Link's voice) "Kiss me, princess!"

A. Link: Well I'm sorry if I felt that saving your life so many times warrented a bit of affection!

Zelda: I'm a princess, not some kind of two-bit-

Megaman: We've got a match to commentate! From now on, the big one's named Legolas, and the little one is Ernie.

"Legolas": That's the dumbest... Hey! Why does it.. My name's Link!

Megaman: Not anymore!

"Ernie": I don't get it...

Zelda: We're not elves, you know! Tolkein or Keebler!

Megaman: According to my databases, elves are human-like creatures with slanted features and pointed ears. So are you.

"Legolas": This is... Okay, lets just start the fight... And I'm NOT Legolas!

"Ernie": Don't we need to introduce the fighters first?

Zelda: Yes, we do, Link that isn't a jerk. In the third round of the Triforce Tournament, Mario is fighting Marth at Hyrule Temple.

Megaman: Three lives each. No items. We want to make this fair, after all.

"Legolas": I actually got a chance to talk to- oh, for the love of! Who's putting that there? That's it! (Adult Link storms off)

Voice: AAAAAHHH!

There goes one intern.

A. Link: (Adult Link comes back) Okay, that's settled. As I was saying, I got a chance to talk to Mario and Marth... They're both on the same page of helping me put it somewhere safe if they win, so we're not too worried of the outcome of this match.

Zelda: Excuse me? They should be giving it to me...

A. Link: Whatever you say Ganna.

Remember, kids. Toad DOESN'T wear a belt.

Zelda: There was far more going on there than you know...

A. Link: Whatever you say, princess.

Y. Link: Mario and Marth are looking impatient...

Zelda: Then lets start this...THREE, TWO, ONE

Y. Link: FIGHT!

Megaman: Mario's off to an agressive start, leaping up and hurling fireballs at Marth.

Zelda: Marth is struck by one but leaps over the others, going in with a chop.

A. Link: Mario's struck and sent back, but he quickly hops to his feet.

Y. Link: Marth rushes in for another strike...

Megaman: But Mario dodges and grabs him, spinning an Airplane Swing to toss him off the edge.

Zelda: Marth makes it back quickly and brings a Half Moon slash towards Mario's head.

A. Link: A quick recovery comes witth a foot to Marth's back!

Y. Link: Marth moves to his feet, halting a momement to wait for Mario.

Megaman: Mario runs in, and Marth swings...

Zelda: But Mario rolls back being hit by the Falchion.

A. Link: That's not a Falchion.

Y. Link: What do you mean?

Megaman: The plumber steps in again...

Zelda: Marth swings once more, but the cape sends him back!

Megaman: And Mario grabs him from behind!

A. Link: I know swords. That's a Longsword, not a Falchion.

There will be a test.

Zelda: He calls it a Falchion; it's a Falchion.

Y. Link: Ooh, Launched into the air and hit by the plumber's boot!

A. Link: That's a two-bladed sword! Falchions aren't!

Megaman: Mario goes to follow with a drill kick, but is Countered away!

Zelda: You're being unreasonable. It's completely irrelivent.

A. Link: But he's using a longsword!

Y. Link: Marth catches him with an aerial swipe before he lands!

Megaman: And Mario tosses fireballs back as he stands, halting Marth's rush.

Zelda: If he has a longsword, what are you using?

A. Link: Also a longsword.

Y. Link: Ooh, Mario's gotten in close and Drilled down onto Marth.

Zelda: Your swords don't even look alike.

Megaman: Drill into Tornado, excllent combo there.

A. Link: There are different kinds of longsword. His is more of a bastard sword.

Y. Link:And up into a bicycle kick as Marth is sent up... Hey, Megaman... Why's it called a bicycle kick?

Zelda: Excuse me? What did you just call Marth?

Megaman: Because you spin around like the wheels on a bicycle.

A. Link: I didn't call him anything! It means he's got a longsword that can be used easily in one hand or two.

Y. Link: Oh... Ooh, Marth's up and mad! He's run in and grabbed Mario!

Zelda: That's still not the type of word you should be using in front of a princess.

Megaman: Two knee attacks to the face...

A. Link: Well excuuuuse me, princess.

Y. Link: And a slam into the ground!

Zelda: Don't use that tone of voice with me!

Megaman: Marth moves back before Mario's recovery kick...

A. Link: And why not?

Y. Link: But he's in quickly with a two-slash combo!

Zelda: Because I'm a princess, that's why not.

Megaman: A few more fireballs tossed as Mario gathers himself, but Marth's sword deflects them.

A. Link: And you'd be dead a hundred times over if it wasn't for me.

Y. Link: They're staring each other off...

Zelda: I could handle myself just fine.

Megaman: Marth steps forward...

A. Link: No you couldn't! Until you started going around as Shiek, you were nearly incompetant!

Y. Link: Mario rushes in to meet him... But Marth steps back and gives him a strong slash!

Zelda: How dare you! And you wonder why I never saw fit to show you affection...

Megaman: Mario's sent towards the edge, and Marth chases.

A. Link: You're just making excuses!

Y. Link: Mario leapt off the edge! What's he doing?

Zelda: I'm just telling the truth, you arrogant cad!

Megaman: A few flicks of the cape, and he's brought himself to the lower level!

A. Link: You're telling what you want to be truth!

Y. Link: What's a cad?

Zelda: Maybe you just don't understand what truth is!

Megaman: Marth's dropping down through the platforms to get to him.

A. Link: Maybe I'll pull the lense out on you?

Y. Link: If he's a cad, am I a cad, too? What's a cad?

Zelda: Why not hold it up to a mirror? Maybe you'll finally see what an idiot you really are!

Megaman: But Mario's waiting for him, and a shield raises to stop Marth's Half Moon.

A. Link: Maybe I'll hold it in front of you and see the selfish witch you pretend not to be?

Y. Link: Is being a cad bad? I don't think I want to be a cad...

Zelda: How dare you...

Megaman: WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE COMMENTATING?!?

A. Link: Sorry...

Y. Link: Sorry...

Zelda: Sorry...

Megaman: Marth's been hit!

A. Link: It's still not a falchion.

Zelda: You're still a cad.

Y. Link: What's a cad?

Megaman: AHEM!

A. Link: Marth and Mario are smacking each other around down there, bouncing back and forth.

Y. Link: Yeah, damage builds up fast in that cave cause there's nowhere to go.

Zelda: Marth's been grabbed!

Megaman: And an Airplane swing sends him flying straight to the left.

A. Link: He's not getting back from that one.

Y. Link: BOOM!

Zelda: Boom?

Y. Link: Yeah, you know, big flash of lights and sound when someone falls...

Zelda: Oh.

Megaman: Marth's making his way back, coming carefully to the cave area.

A. Link: Mario's ready, peppering the area with fireballs.

Y. Link: Marth drops down anyway, then hops over the fireballs.

Zelda: He makes a sharp swing at Mario...

Megaman: And Mario slips back a foot!

Zelda: Wait, what did he just do?

A. Link: That's the Wavedash!

Megaman: Explain, please?

A. Link: It's a faster, smoother way of motion than running... But it's really hard. Luigi was doing it when he fought Mario. I haven't been able to get the hang of it.

Y. Link: When Marth was off guard, he slipped back in and Headbutted him, ooh.

Zelda: And up into the Boot, no less.

Megaman: Marth gives a quick slash as he stands, running over to grab Mario.

A. Link: Another Knee hit, and then he tosses Mario forward, bouncing him off the ground..

Y. Link: And a Dragon Killer smash attack, ooh!

Zelda: Mario's sent flying forward... He's gone.

A. Link: Yeah, right in the sweet spot, too.

Megaman: Sweet spot?

A. Link: Marth's sword is weighted near the tip... So that if he strikes with the end of the weapon, it hurts a lot more than getting struck with the center.

Y. Link: Not like Roy's sword, which is weighted near the hilt...

A. Link: Or our swords, which are evenly weighted.

Y. Link: Yay us!

A. Link: We rule!

Zelda: Cad...

Y. Link: What's a cad?!?

Megaman: And here comes Mario back to the top...

Zelda: Mario moved off to the right side of the stage and... taunts.

Y. Link: He's really big.

A. Link: He's SUPER Big.

Megaman: And now he's not. He moves to the tunnel and starts dropping fireballs into the area below.

Zelda: Marth slips off to the right to avoid the rain of flames.

Y. Link: And Mario drops down into the area, still tossing flames.

A. Link: Marth's main weakness is his lack of a projectile... And his tiara.

Megaman: Marth tries to move in again, but Mario glides back and hits him with another fireball.

Zelda: What's wrong with his Tiara? I think it's gorgeous.

Y. Link: Mario backs up to the edge, and Marth swings his sword again!

A. Link: Yeah, but it's clearly a GIRL'S tiara.

Megaman: It was a gift from his sister.

Zelda: See? Perfectly good reason.

A. Link: That doesn't make it any less womanly... Whoah, Mario dropped off the edge!

Y. Link: And Jump Punch gets him to grab it AND hits Marth for two coins!

Megaman: And followed up with a kick as he gets back.

Zelda: I'm sure it makes sense for those with siblings.

A. Link: Yeah, well, we don't have any.

Y. Link: We have Saria. She's like a sibling!

A. Link: True. We love Saria.

Megaman: Marth's getting up with a quick slash, though, catching Mario twice with his sword.

Zelda: And wouldn't you wear something like that if Saria gave it to you?

Y. Link: No.

A. Link: It's very, very girly.

Zelda: ...Cad.

Y. Link: What's a cad?!?

Megaman: He grabs hold of Mario and tosses him up...

A. Link: Ooh, and he catches Mario on the way down!

Zelda: Another toss up..

Y. Link: And he's caught Mario again, wow!

Megaman: And up goes Mario...

A. Link: And caught again...

Zelda: And up again...

Y. Link: Caught again, this is getting bad.

Megaman: Looks like the chain throwing's working, so Marth keeps tossing him up...

A. Link: Ah, smart this time. Drill kick stopped Marth from grasping him again!

Zelda: Drill into tornado again.

Y. Link: And a headbutt as Marth lands, smacking him against the cieling.

Megaman: Marth bounces, hitting the floor, and swings his sword as he recovers.

A. Link: Mario's knocked back and runs in at Marth!

Zelda: Marth swings...

Y. Link: And Mario slides back, and then in!

Megaman: And follows up with a Fire Glove blast to Marth's face, sending him out and away!

A. Link: Mario's doing great.

Zelda: Much better than you did.

Y. Link: ...Can you two stop fighting, please?

Megaman: It is kind of annoying.

A. Link: It's not my fault that the only words that can properly describe her can't be said on television.

Zelda: And it's not my fault that he's a heartless, arrgoant, narcissistic-

Y. Link: STOP IT!

Megaman: You're starting to upset the kid...

A. Link: Hey, you're tougher than that, right? Not gonna let someone like Zelda upset you, are you?

Y. Link: Umm... Well... it's...

Zelda: Leave him alone, Link. You don't need to corrupt him. At least give him a chance of being a better person than YOU.

A. Link: Corrupt? He's going to be a hero when he's my age!

Megaman: You two can make a few moments feel like- Ah, finally! Marth's back and ready for action! Look, things to commentate on.

Zelda: Right... Marth's heading down to the cave again...

A. Link: Quicker this time, going in and quickly slashing Mario.

Y. Link: Mario jumps up when he recovers.

Megaman: But Marth swings an Anti-Air Slash and sends him up on the left, through the platforms.

Zelda: Mario's staying at the top this time... He's showing off that slide, back and forth...

A. Link: Looks like Marth's getting fed up. He leaps up to Mario and starts chasing!

Y. Link: Mario leads him off towards the left edge!

Megaman: Fireballs are tossed, but Marth hops in with the airborne Double Slash.

Zelda: Mario's sent off the edge, but Marth's waiting with his sword!

A. Link: Marth slashes a smash, but Mario capes it, stopping the sword and getting back on the edge.

Y. Link: And kicking Marth in the back!

Megaman: Mario rushes in to follow, but Marth sends a slash across his chest!

Zelda: Mario's on the defensive now, and Marth hops in for an Aerial Swipe, tossing him forward.

A. Link: A solid strike, and another sends Mario flying off the edge.

Y. Link: He's leaping over to follow! Half moon swing!

Megaman: Mario's sent down, but he catches himself in the air and leaps back up, doesn't look like enough, though.

Zelda: He's not aiming for the ledge! He's leapt at Marth!

A. Link: It's the cape!

Y. Link: Marth's jumping the wrong way!

Megaman: And Mario's too far to recover, they're both dropping down...

Zelda: A sacrifical attack for Mario plays out perfectly!

A. Link: And the prince is down!

Y. Link: DOUBLE BOOM!

Zelda: ...Prince?

Megaman: That was well done on Mario's part.

Zelda: Marth's a prince?

A. Link: Yeah, have you been out of the loop or something?

Zelda: A prince... Hmm...

A. Link: Before you say anything more, I don't care if you pursue Marth, and it's not going to make me jealous. I have a girlfriend. Anyway, where was I?

Zelda: You were explaining how much of a narccissist you are.

"Arrogant Jerk": I am not a... Huh? HEY! THAT'S IT! Prepare to be stabbed AGAIN! (Rushes out of the commentator's box)

Megaman: ...I'll go see how Marth is. (Exits after Link)

Zelda: Cad...

Y. Link: I'm not a cad, am I?

Zelda: Oh... Of course not!

Y. Link: ...Why do you hate me? Him... Us...? Why do you hate Link?

Zelda: I don't hate him... I'm just very mad at him. ...He's much better to Malon than he ever was to me. (Hugs Young Link) I'm sorry... You'll understand when you're older.

Y. Link: But... I don't like seeing you fight.

Zelda: Run along... There's nothing you can do...

Y. Link: ... (Walks off, whispering to himself) We'll see...

A. Link: Great job, Mario!

Mario: Thanks. I a-do my a-best.

A. Link: You need to win this... The only other person left in the tournoment I can really trust with the triforce is the kid.

Mario: Don't a-worry. I'm a-sure he'll do a-fine...

A. Link: I don't know... I keep getting these... visions. I'm really worried about his fight with Roy.. It's almost as though I remember losing, even though I know the fight hasn't happened yet... And they keep coming with these migranes.

Mario: Maybe you should go a-talk to the a-Doctor. I don't a-know about your a-visions, but I a-think he can a-help with the a-migranes.

A. Link: Yeah... Good idea... I'll see you later. (Heads off)

Megaman: Marth! Can I talk to you?

Marth: Yes.

Megaman: How do you feel about the results of this match?

Marth: Mario is a great guy... I'm a bit unhappy that I lost, but I am hoping he wins the tournoment. I don't want to see another incident.

Megaman: Glad to hear that... I'm rooting for him, too.

A. Link: Hey! Marth, a word, please!

Marth: Yes?

A. Link: Your sword.

Marth: Falchion?

A. Link: That's not a Falchion.

Marth: What?

A. Link: A Falchion has one blade and is heavy. Your have a longsword.

Marth: Oh...

A. Link: But you call it a Falchion.

Marth: Ah, see. There is a good reason for that.

A. Link: What?

Marth: I don't speak English very well.

A. Link: That is a good... Urg...

Marth: Urg?

A. Link: Sorry... My head's just... really hurting right now.

Zelda: Well, it's just me still in the box, so here's my questions for you...

• 1. Will Mario pull through in the tournoment?
• 2. Why is Link such a cad?
• 3. Will Sonic or Waluigi win in the next round?
• 4. ...Why do I suddenly feel a horrible headache coming on...?

Impa: You have a visitor...

Y. Zelda: Who?

Impa: The fairy boy.

Y. Zelda: Send him in! Quick!

Impa: Enter.

Y. Link: ...Hi... Zelda...

Y. Zelda: Hi, Fairy boy!

Y. Link: Link, please...

Y. Zelda: Oh, my apologies. Hi, Link.

Y. Link: I wanted to talk to you... (steps closer) I want to know what you expect of me...

Y. Zelda: Oh, you're my hero now! You're going to have to stop all the baddies!

Y. Link: Is that all...?

Y. Zelda: What do you mean?

Y. Link: ...I brought you flowers... (Holds up a few fresh-picked flowers)

Impa: ...I'll leave you two to talk. Princess, do not hesitate to call if you need anything.

Y. Zelda: ...Y-yes... Of course.

Y. Link: Oh, Impa! Before you go, can I ask you a question, please?

Impa: Of course. What is it?

Y. Link: ...What's a cad?

Remember kids, Young Link has the Ocarina of Time also.