Match #161

The Question: Who out of the first batch of this season's winners is qualified to compete for the title "King of the Stadium"?

The Fighters for Battlefield
Mario Donkey Kong
Marth Ike
Stock: 1 life
Items: Low

Metal Man: Laaaadies and Gentlemen, robots and ungodly time-traveling spirits! Welcome to the second not-quite-annual King of the Stadium match!

SIMBER: You mean Gentleman 1 and Gentleman 2. There is no way anyone else is watching this. I tripped over a pile of virtual tumbleweeds just getting here.

Metal Man: Wait... why would you have to walk here? Don't tell me... you're a crazy man who's painted himself teal! I KNEW IT!

SIMBER: Walking is faster than the Stadium's horrible dial-up.

Metal Man: ...Bah. I'll figure you out sooner or later!

SIMBER: For this lovely tournament, three battles will occur in rapid succession, followed by one final finale. The three battles will be slightly shorter than usual, with low items and one life per combatant. We don't want to be held up waiting, anyway.

Metal Man: But I have all the time in the world...

SIMBER: Those two fans have been waiting months! And you want to make them wait? No. We shall begin now... with Digi and Navi with the first match of the tournament!

Metal Man: I still think my epic battle with all of them at once with high gravity and raining bob-ombs would be better...

Digi: 15 of the Super Smash Stadium's fighters have qualified for the chance to win the honor of King of the Stadium. Here, we're taking five of them and narrowing them to one finalist in the Battlefield. Will it be Mario, defending champion Donkey Kong, Marth, Ike, or Wario?

Navi: They all seem like they've got a pretty equal shot of winning...Lots of strong fighters here, I'm almost scared to interview the losers!

Digi: Well, we can split that bill if you need to. Anyways, we're going to try to keep most items out of the way, but don't be surprised if the fighters go for a Smash Ball...

Navi: It just wouldn't be an SSS match without a little potential for chaos, would it? Looks like the winner will need luck on his side as much as skill.

Digi: I agree with you there, Navi. The fighters are entering the arena--Mario on the lower left, Donkey Kong above him, Marth's way up top, Ike's below Marth, and Wario's to the lower left. Battlefield's a small stage to begin with, this is only going to make it more crowded.

Navi: Something about the way DK's standing tells me he's going really lay into the other contestants soon. I don't think he's at all ready to give up his title. Kinda neat that we've got two dreamy, er, strong swordsmen in this battle.

Digi: I thought that's what you called Link, not Ike and Marth...and there's the start of the match! Sure enough, just like you thought, Donkey Kong is laying into the plumber, slamming him into the ground.

Navi: *blushing* Beggars can't be choosy...*snaps back to normal* Wow, and he's got Ike too, rolling right into him and launching up with his famous Hand Slap!

Digi: Wario's trying as well, he's also unsuccessful! Flies off the edge, but he stays on...yeah, he's even giving himself some open space to taunt.

Navi: Look at him, just shrugging to the crowd like it's nothing!

"Fakery Bakery! The cake is not a lie!"
Donkey Kong

Digi: Marth's charging a Shield Breaker on Ike and connects! With a finals berth on the line, no alliance is safe. He keeps going with Dancing Blade, and Ike is getting some air time...

Navi: ...which he takes advantage of, slamming into Marth's face with his Aether! Meanwhile, DK's in trouble, stuck in Wario's oversized maw...and he's getting scorched by Mario's fireballs at the same time!

Digi: The Kong is being caught completely off guard, and he's being robbed by Mario's Super Jump Punch!

"Spinarak Silk Shorts: Youngster-approved!"
Donkey Kong

Navi: Looks like Donkey just turned the tables, slamming Mario down with his Headbutt, and pulling off a quick Giant Punch while the plumber's stuck in the ditch!

Digi: He's still after him, too, with that Giant Punch! However, Mario reverts to one of his old favorites when he gets up, the Mario Tornado--hey, now he's grabbed DK and glancing at the edge of the platform!

Navi: I think I know what Mario's thinking...and that can't be good for Donkey! A quick spinning "Bowser Toss" and off DK goes, out of the arena and out of the match!

Digi: Just like that, the champ is out! Long live the King! Marth and Ike still going at each other, though, and Marth gets burned with an Falchion Eruption--and Captain Falcon is probably ready to punch me for that.

Navi: Marth seems to be struggling to get his bearings back, but not before Ike slashes him into the air...and burns him again...and again...and again! He's got to get out of there...oh! He's angling his fall to the right platform...but Wario slams into him with his Corkscrew Conk attack! It's another K.O.!

"Star Road...Not Starbucks, but an incredible simulation."
Donkey Kong

Digi: For a match with five combatants, Wario's played the scavenger role amazingly well. Ike and Mario pick up on this, ganging up and giving him a flurry of shots. Wario punches his rival, though, and Mario's sent off to the left, but still alive.

Navi: Let's see if Ike's sword skills can...nope, the Wario Waft propels him out of the ring! I'm glad we're up here in this booth where we're safe from the fumes!

"Cheese plushies: You know you want one."
Donkey Kong

Digi: Wario's running in, but Mario sends him back with FLUDD. Wario sets up a belly flop, but misses. (glances at the arena) Hang on, I see a Smash Ball...

Navi: Hey, look! Mario's jumped to it and he's got it! Wario might be in trouble!

Digi: Oh, he knows it, too, going for another Corkscrew. It hits but he will be denied the Smash Ball.

Navi: Look! Mario's on fire!

Digi: The Mario Finale! Wario cannot get up in time after the Conk! He's hit, and out! Mario is moving on!


This game's winner is...Mario!

Navi: Whew, what a rush, looks like it's time for me to do my job...

Digi: Indeed, why don't you talk to Mario and I'll go talk to one of those less fortunate.

Navi: Great idea. (walks over to Mario) So, Mario, how's it feel to have a shot at the big title bout?

Mario: Well, I-a-almost didn't think I would-a-make it. Wario's tricky...I'm-a-just glad I was so lucky!

Navi: Well, good luck on the road to the championship!

Boshi: me...

Navi: WHERE DID YOU COME FROM? *takes out sword*

Boshi: Yoink! *runs away*

Digi: Well, that was atypical, Navi. But I am with Ike, who was third in the match. Ike, your first season here, how was it to be in the running?

Ike: I thought I did pretty well, but I think I shouldn't have fought with Marth too much at the start. There's a lot on the line and we could have settled that later in the fight.

Digi: Very true. What do you think about Mario winning?

Ike: A fitting victory for a hero like him, but...I wish it could have been me or Marth moving on. Maybe Roy will win his match and get in.

Digi: Thanks a lot. Is Marth willing to talk?

Ike: If you think your viewers won't mind him ranting in Japanese, go ahead.

Digi: (nods) Okay, then I think we'll let him cool off on his own. Thanks, Ike.

Ike: You're welcome.

Navi: Well, I guess I'll see how the previous King of the Stadium is faring, um...

Donkey Kong: How could I possibly lose? Everything was perfect, and then...

Navi: Um, don't worry, we all have our bad days, and um...

Donkey Kong: I was set up! *punches* Somehow, something was rigged...sigh, I'm off to drown my sorrows in bananas. Later. *walks off*

Navi: That was...awkward.

Digi: Yeah, I had a feeling DK wouldn't be too happy about that. Now, usually this would be the point where we'd ask questions, but since we've got to clear the way for the next five-man match, we'll be holding off for now.

Navi: I wonder if anyone around here wants to be chocolate buddies...Er, anyway, let's hope the next match is as exciting as this one was!

Digi: Still trying to go for that, huh? (shakes his head and chuckles) In any case, moving on the next match...

SIMBER: Metal Man, put on the next match.

Metal Man: But it isn't done yet!

SIMBER: Fine. We'll have everyone sit and stare at this line until you pick up the pace and put it up.

Metal Man: Bah! Fine! I'm on it, I'm on it!

*A few minutes later*

Metal Man: Here you go everybody, the next match!

SIMBER: What? I'm not in it? I'll get you for this!

Metal Man: Aieeee! *Leaps out a window!*

Match events by Terri
Navi's commentary by Terri
Digi's commentary by Digi
Pre-and-post match banter by Metal
HTML and site stuff by Metal
Special Thanks to Yesman, Dark Ermac, Pat V, Light Bear, GameGuru, Saiyaman, and Wolfman2000